


For The Emperor

by willingsurrender



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, But Mostly Smut, Canon-Typical Violence, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Heavy Angst, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, POV Second Person, Sorry Not Sorry, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Unhappy Ending, Unhealthy Relationships, Updating weekly, could possibly be triggering so check tags before reading, there is a lot of really unhealthy stuff in coming chapters
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-13
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:08:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 28
Words: 65,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26991910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/willingsurrender/pseuds/willingsurrender
Summary: Once there was chaos, war, famine. Now, under the rule of the First Order, peace had settled across the galaxies. At the top stood the man you loved, the man who had brought it all together. Kylo Ren, first Emperor of the new Order. You were his empress, his passion, his queen. But such power and such emotion, was bound to come with pain and anguish.Updates Weekly, but probably more often.
Relationships: Ben Solo | Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/Reader, You/Original Character
Comments: 7
Kudos: 61





	1. Chapter 1

Once there was chaos, war, famine. Now, under the rule of the First Order, peace had settled across the galaxies. Cities were rebuilt, purpose was given to those who survived the battles. Fear had been replaced with harmony and prosperity. At the top stood the man you loved, the man who had brought it all together. Kylo Ren, first emperor of the new Order. You had been by his side since the battles had begun, first serving as a member of his council. You didn’t come to the Order with much; you’d lost your parents in your teens and had since lived a very solitary life. All of your time went into your work, climbing the ranks within the Order’s branch on your planet. Receiving a promotion was the most exciting moment of your life; finally, being able to leave your home and feel like you were making a difference within the new world. 

Your job was to advise and feedback on planets under your designated supervision, sitting in on meetings and occassionally reporting to superior officers if called for.  
You had been at the capital for around 2 weeks before first meeting him; his presence swallowed you as he entered the conference. Even though you were sitting at opposite ends of a crowded room, it felt as though his attention was solely on you. Mask gazing in your direction, Kylo studied the new recruit; you were fresh and hopeful, the glimmer in your eye told him you were kind and gentle, something that not many people within the capital could say anymore. He scanned your mind, trying to learn all he could while you focussed on the conversation around the table. As the only woman in the room, you desperately tried to speak but were continuously shut down. As you began to explain your view on the current subject matter, one of the officers positioned opposite you interrupted. Your fists clenched, frustration building but before you could voice your anger, Kylo stood. “I think the new recruit was speaking officer. You’ll do well to remember your manners around a young lady.” The entire table turned to face him; it was the first thing he had said all meeting. Your cheeks flushed pink, hand tucking your hair behind your ear as he signalled you to continue speaking. Addressing the room, your eyes kept darting over to the man who had defended you as he once again sat down. Head resting on his hand, he watched you with an intense energy. Even after you had finished speaking, his eyes never left you. With the meeting drawing to a close you quickly gathered your belongings and stood, wanting to thank the man who supported you. But as you turned to walk towards where he had been positioned, you realised he had already left. 

You were anxious for the next meeting, mind not being able to focus on anything other than the mysterious mask that had stared you down during the last assembly. He was all you could think about; he’d buried into your brain and consumed your conscious thought. As you made your way into the conference room, you realised that your designated seat had moved. No longer were you placed at the bottom of the table; you had been allocated the seat at the head, next to Kylo. You took your seat, nervously looking around the room as your eyes caught the disapproving glares of officers entering and finding their own places. They didn’t like that you now sat at such a prestigious position on the table after only being here for such a short time. Looking down at your data pad you failed to notice the tall black frame appear beside you, taking his seat and scanning the room. “Something the matter soldier?” Kylo watched as the officers to his left straightened up, gaze snapping from you to the masked superior. “You have a problem with the way I have chosen to seat this council?” The officer shook his head furiously and let his eyes drop to the table in front of him. Kylo’s mask glanced towards you and then back to the table, signalling the meeting to start. While the conversation around the table became heated, men turning on each other as they argued over trivial matters, you felt Kylo’s leg rest against your own as he sat forward with his arms resting on the table. Your knees pressing against each other, lip caught between your teeth as you watched his hand move from the table to rest on your thigh. The shouting and debating began to simmer into background noise as your mind focussed solely on the feeling of his hand on you. Conversation turned to your sector, eyes shifting to you. Realising you were expected to speak, your back straightened and words began falling from your mouth. Giving your report was easy; there were no real issues in your sector and everything you had to say was straight forward. What made it difficult was the feeling of fingers running up and down your thigh, shielded from view by your proximity to the table. As you finished your report, the hand left your thigh. Kylo stood, walking around the table as the officers’ discussion quickly returned to the heated debate it was before your report. His back rested against the wall, gaze never leaving you as he took you in from his new perspective. There was something so intriguing about you; just as he hadn’t left your mind since the last time you met, you had not left his. Kylo couldn’t explain his fascination with you or why your image wouldn’t leave his brain. He didn’t know why he imagined your body in his arms when his eyes closed, or why the thought of your smile calmed him so much. He respected you as an officer, he admired your drive and ambition; he saw a lot of himself in you which only made his curiosity grow. The meeting drew to a close and you rose from your chair. 

Turning to the door, you felt a hand gently grip your arm causing you to draw your attention to the person behind you. Your heart dropped slightly, disappointed that the hand didn’t belong to the masked figure that plagued you. One of the younger officers beamed down at you, smiling as your eyes met. “I hope you don’t mind, but I just wanted to say you’re doing really well. I know how hard it is being the new guy. So well done sticking with it.” You smiled, body turning to face the man “thanks I really appreciate that, it’s been pretty rough. I’m starting to feel pretty unwelcome around here.” The hand on your arm began to rub up and down as he tilted his head slightly, “I can assure you, there’s definitely people around here that are happy about your arrival.” Your lip caught in your teeth as his smile became suggestive, his eye dropping into a cheeky wink. Before you could speak, a strong presence behind you sent a shiver down your spine. “So glad to see you taking the time to harass the new staff, instead of returning to your post, general.” The modulator made the tone harsh, causing you both to freeze. The man released your arm from his grip and bowed. “I’m sorry sir, I was simply welcoming the newest member to the team. Wouldn’t want her thinking we’re all mean and closed minded.” He smiled at you once more, dropping another quick wink before walking away. As you turned to speak to the frightening man looming behind, he walked away before you had the chance to meet his gaze.


	2. Chapter 2

One morning, you were called into the command centre. There had been plans to expand housing within your area of supervision and the Supreme Leader had requested an audience with you. This was the most important moment of your career and you had spent all week preparing all the data and plans needed for your meeting. Walking into the Supreme Leader’s office, you bit your lip as your eyes fell on the cold mask that watched you as Kylo stood by the large window next to the throne of the Supreme Leader. You hadn’t expected him to be there; his presence making you even more nervous. Head bowing down, you smiled and began your presentation. The look on the face of the Supreme Leader suggested that he was impressed with your work, nodding along as you explained the general plans for development. Pausing to allow time for the leader to read a report directly from the ground, your eyes drifted over to Kylo who began to make his way over to you. He started to circle you; arms crossed over his chest as each foot step made your heartbeat race. “Clever little one, aren’t you? Doing all this by yourself. It makes me wonder why you’re just a simple officer and not in a higher position…” he stopped in front of you, Force wrapping around your throat as he lifted you into the air. You began to kick, fighting the restraint on your neck as oxygen started to escape you. “I see inside your mind, little one. I see your passion, I see your drive. But I don’t see any goal or aim. Any strong allegiances and that makes me cautious.” You heard the Supreme Leader order him to drop you, like he was a dog, a low growl leaving the mask as your feet met the floor once more. Panting, you staggered backwards trying to catch your breath.  
“You like to entertain the officers around here with your pretty little smile, you like to make a scene and make sure all eyes are on you. To me, you’re either a resistance spy or a threat to the leader. No one just appears with the level of knowledge and skill you have. So, tell me, little one. What exactly is your aim here, and where do you loyalties lie?” Each step backwards you took was mirrored by one forward from Kylo; he had you pinned to the wall as you staggered over your words. “I have no idea what you’re talking about Commander Ren… M…my loyalty has always been to the Supreme Leader. A… All I’ve ever wanted was a chance to prove myself. That’s all. No one has given me the chance; all I want is the chance to prove myself. To you.” His head tilted, watching as your big eyes focussed on him, small frame cowering under his pressure. “That’s a good girl,” his hand rested on your cheek, “that’s what I like to hear. Tell me exactly who you want to prove yourself to.” Eyes closing as the hand stroked your cheek, you let out a long sigh before looking up at him once more. “You, sir… I want to impress you. I want you to know what I can do.” Kylo’s body was ripped away from yours as the Supreme Leader launched him across the room, pinning him to the wall. You heart jumped out of your chest, watching the exchange between the two powerful men.  
“Know your place boy. You do not antagonise my work force. This young lady is here to serve my purpose, not to entertain your boyish fantasies.” Kylo returned to the floor, body tense as rage began to take over. Cape whipping from the force of his movements, the enraged man stormed out of the room leaving you dazed, concerned and aroused. 

After the incident with the Supreme Leader, Kylo quickly took it upon himself to acknowledge your potential and endorse you. Giving you control of more projects with each meeting he oversaw. Before long, you became his personal advisor which consisted of spending many long nights alone trying to ignore the irrefutable tension between the two of you. Trying to throw yourself into the work, you repressed the thoughts that filled you head during your time discussing serious matters. But every time your eyes met that mask, your mind raced with images of his body close to yours. You craved his hands on you, body aching for his touch whenever he was close. The power he exuded always sparked an excitement within you. Every time he spoke, he commanded such a respect from all who heard him. Even though you’d never seen his face, something powerful drew you to him, like it didn’t matter what was beneath the mask. On the nights that you worked alone with him, you kept as much distance between the two of you as possible; unwilling to give in to the screaming of your body’s desire. You knew he heard it, his advances and the innuendo in his voice only made it harder for you to focus on your work. 

One night, after a glorious victory over the Resistance forces, the tension could not be ignored, and you spent the night in each other’s ravenous embrace.  
He had invited you up to his personal chambers for the first time, luring you in with a toast to your joint success and the promise of a relaxing evening off. You decided to dress for the occasion, opting for a short black dress and heels. Knocking on the door of his quarters, you straightened out the dress whilst the door swung open on its own. The empty corridor threw you, making you uneasy as you walked in and shut the door behind you. Your breath caught in your throat when you saw him; his eyes shining in the dim light of his room, scar running down one side of his face. You were looking at his face, not the mask, and your brain could barely process it. His smile was one of the most beautiful things you’d ever seen, not being able to take your eyes away from his mouth as he walked towards you. You’d heard rumours and had your own guesses; from the way he composed himself you had expected someone older, more weathered. But he was young and very beautiful. “Good evening little one, I was worried you’d leave me hanging. But I’m so glad to see you’ve dressed up for me” He took your hand in his own and left a gentle kiss on the skin, his eyes scanning over your body with a glimmer of hunger. You smiled, eyes still staring at the face in front of you. He was one of the most handsome men you’d ever seen. “Lost for words pet?” he chuckled and led you into the main room, “I told you, tonight is for relaxing. So,” he handed you a glass of wine and sat in the large armchair positioned by the window, running a hand through his thick dark hair, “I thought I’d let my hair down.” You chuckled and stood at the window beside the chair. Looking out at the city below, you sighed and sipped your drink. You could very quickly get used to a view like this, the company next to you making it much sweeter.  
“So, why did you invite me up here Commander?” He turned to you, looking up from where he sat and smiled. “Well I couldn’t just walk around the tower without my mask, pet. But I thought it was time I saw that beautiful smile of yours with my own eyes.” His hand caught yours once more, pulling you to stand between his legs. You placed your glass on the table beside you and looked down at the man in the chair, biting your lip as your gaze met his. “Is it wrong of me to say that you have beautiful eyes, commander?” Your cheeks turned pink, the sudden burst of confidence shocking yourself as you saw a smile form on Kylo’s lips. He rose from his seat, free hand reaching for your cheek as he angled your face up to his.  
“Is it wrong of me to say I want to kiss you, officer?” His head tilted as he waited for your response. Pulse racing, you wrapped your arms around his neck, bringing his mouth crashing into yours as you moaned against him. His hand gripped your hips, rutting his own against you as your fingers tangled in his hair. The hunger for each other consumed you both, clothes flying off as you gave into the desire that had built for weeks. 

It didn’t stop there; with each victory and each extension of his power over the enemy, Kylo’s infatuation for you grew. He saw you as the driving force of his success and so turned to you whenever he progressed towards his ultimate goal. Soon you were no longer his advisor, but his companion. His muse and inspiration for a better world. Every time your name left his lips it was as if everything was right in the universe. By the time Kylo has risen through the ranks of the First Order, you were his rock, his power, and his biggest supporter. When the time came that he overthrew the Supreme Leader and seized control of the Order, you were on his arm and fighting his battles by his side. His empress, his passion, his queen. But such power and such emotion, was bound to come with pain and anguish.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things start going wrong.

Peace reigned over most of the galaxies. 

Emperor Ren had seen to it that the Resistance had all but fallen, and the people were given the chance to join and prosper. 

The capital had been the shining jewel of the new Order for the past few years; a beacon of hope for the future under the new emperor. Its streets felt safe and secure, enough for you to roam without guards or protection. Everyone knew you, respected you. You stood by his side at every public speech and parade, every battle and announcement. Your face was known just as his mask was, and people held you to the same regard as him. 

The streets felt like home to you and you took every chance you could to join the people in their everyday lives. It felt nice to escape the meetings and inspections, to simply speak to people about their lives and joys instead of missions and reports. The marketplace had always been your favourite. The smells, the sounds... It was magical and everyone loved seeing you. The merchants would greet you fondly as you walked by, praising your efforts and thanking you and the Emperor for the life they were able to have. A part of you always felt embarrassed; these people were so good and so kind, even after the years of war they had lived through. You didn't always feel you deserved their praise, after all you had been protected from the fighting due to your position. Many of them had lost so much but were able to rebuild in their new home. They saw you as part of that rebuilding, and welcomed you openly no matter what. 

Kylo knew where you were at all times; he was in your mind and in your heart wherever you went, always able to feel your presence and pinpoint where you were, so you always felt protected. With every day you've spent together, your bond grew; your minds worked as one even when your bodies were apart.

You walked through the market, as you would any free day you had. The children playing in the fountain always made you smile, and the smells of the market stands brought back memories of your galactic travels on the arm of the man you adored. All the locals smiled and greeted you openly, each more than happy to spend their time hearing stories of battles far away. 

You would sit and spin tales for the children and their parents who would smile as the children excitedly hung on your every word. It brought you so much joy to see their smiles and know that their future was secured because of what your lover was doing. You had always been passionate about helping the future generations; you volunteered on your home planet as a teaching assistant before joining the Order. 

Perched on the fountain side, your words filled the imaginations of those who sat at your feet, longing to one day tells stories like this themselves. A beautiful gleam of the suns in the sky touched your skin and warmed you as the locals marvelled at your words. It was the perfect day, the perfect moment.

Until it wasn't.

Before you could react, a hooded stranger ran at you. He darted through the crowds, jumping over the children and leaped at you before you had a chance to react. Knife in hand, he grabbed you and charged you both backwards into the fountain. The people screamed and scattered, too afraid to act as the water around you began glowing red. The knife had dug deep into your shoulder, as the stranger wrestled with you, trying to get a hold on your neck. 

Your screams were heard far from the scene, you felt it. 

As the stranger finally gripped your throat, your eyes began to close; the pain becoming too much. It was then you saw it, the burning glow of red that you'd seen so many times before just before your eyes closed. 

The pressure on your neck had gone, as you noticed the red light had penetrated the stranger's chest and made a clean break through his entire body. Lifeless and limp, the body soared into the air and crashed through a pile of old crates. You couldn't move, body searing with pain, floating in the water that mixed with your blood. As your eyes fluttered open only to shut again, your body was lifted into the air and placed on a medbay vessel. Your caught a glimpse of the cold mask of the man who'd saved you as you were carried away for treatment.

Hours had passed; your wound had been stitched but you lie alone in the cold medbay bed. You thought he would have come to check on you by now. Your mind kept reliving the moment you were stabbed, and the moment the hot saber pierced the man's chest. 

Shivers ran through you as your mind showed you the fearful eyes of the public as their emperor slaughtered a man in the middle of the city centre. 

You knew this was bad; he had just ascended to the top and now he was exposed as an emotional and vindictive murderer in front of those who were meant to trust him. As your mind clouded with fearful visions, the door to your room flew open. The cape swooped in and covered the figure as he stormed towards your bed. His hand grabbed yours as he knelt next to you, mask shielding the emotion in his eyes. "How did this happen... how did I let this happen," his voice grew cold and harsh, grip on your hand tightening. His anger grew and you knew he would explode if you didn't calm him. 

"This isn't your fault, I'm ok I promise you," you placed your free hand on the side of his mask, "it will all be ok..." You reached for the clasps on the back of the helmet but he sat up, stopping your hand from freeing his face. 

"How could I have been so careless, lashing out when there were so many nearby." You frowned and took your hands back. 

"So, you weren't talking about me... you, you were worried about your appearance?" You sat up, wincing as pain shot from your shoulder. His head raised to meet yours,

"Of course my appearance, do you understand the severity of what happened? My position is compromised because you had to leave yourself exposed to tell fairy tales to younglings."

Your heart shattered with each word that escaped the mask, tears filling your eyes as you retreated as far as you could from where he was. "How could you say these things? How could you come here, to me like this, and scold me when you couldn't even keep one town peaceful," your voice began to get louder with each word, you slowly raising from the bed to try and stand, "if you were half the leader you make everyone believe you are, I would be free to safely walk the streets without having to worry that my life is in danger. How dare y-" your words fell short as the Force wrapped around your throat. Kylo stood, hand outstretched as his power clenched your neck, just as the stranger had only hours ago. 

"Your weakness," he paused and stepped closer to your body as it fought for freedom from the invisible restraints, "exposes me. How can I lead them when you are such a liability? You are nothing but a burden to me, pet." His grip disappeared from your throat as you regained composure, stepping backwards to create as much distance as possible between you and the masked man whose words cut deeper than any knife ever could. 

"You disgust me, you never cared, did you? Never!" you screamed, "you wouldn't say these things if you did. All I've been is a toy to you, a means to an end. I helped you build this world, you know it. You'd be nothing if it wasn't for me. Everyone told me to run, everyone told me not to fall for it and yet here I am, by your side from the beginning and you're pushing me away... tell me you love me, or at least care about me... please." Tears ran like hot rivers down your face as you clutched your sides, pain overtaking you. His silence spoke volumes as your head dropped, arms wrapping around yourself in an attempt to find any sort of comfort. 

"I want you gone; you're relieved of all posts. You are no longer needed; someone will replace you and their efforts won't cause such distraction I'm sure." With that last sentence, he left the room. You were alone, left to absorb what had just been said. A loud, painful cry fell from you as you collapsed to your knees, sobbing into your hands as your whole world had just walked away.


	4. Chapter 4

Two years had passed, and life had moved on. 

You were over him. At least, that's what you told yourself. You loved your new life, your new love, your new home. For a while you felt him still in your mind, as if he was watching to know where you'd gone. But you learnt to block him out and moved on. How could you hold on when he cast you out so coldly?

Thomas wasn't like that, Thomas showed you love. He listened, he protected, and he made you his entire world. And you loved him. 

At least you told yourself you did. 

Your new life together was happy and peaceful. Everything was peaceful. You couldn’t have found someone more opposite to Kylo if you tried. Thomas had curly blonde hair, not much taller than you but still broad. He was soft spoken, gentle and humble. His energy was so refreshing and always made you happy when you were in his presence. Whenever Thomas touched you, it was soft and caring. He was always cautious not to push your boundaries and helped you battle your inner demons in any way he could.

There was no more Resistance, no more fighting. Since you left, Emperor Ren had solidified his position and brought harmony to the entirety of his domain. Maybe it was true; maybe you were the distraction that was holding him back. While your conscious mind moved on, your heart could not let go so easily. 

The dreams and flashbacks never stopped. You told your new friends they did, you told Thomas they did. But every night, your body and mind craved him again and again. Over and over. You felt his gloved hands, his hot breath every time you closed your eyes. Nothing has ever come close to what he did to your body. But you would never speak it, never admit it to anyone, not even yourself.

The farm was perfect, it was practical and gave you plenty to fill your days with. You adored the animals, spending most of your time caring for them. Every part of it was built by the man who picked you up off the street as he rode by that night, never expecting to bring a lost soul home from the market.

He saw you injured, broken and alone, and took you in. He didn’t see your exposure as weakness, he saw someone who deserved love and kindness. Since that night, Thomas has given you the world and your heart kept beating because of him. You shared every dark terror, every distant memory and everything that had happened to you during your time in the arms of the most powerful man in the galaxy. Nearly every memory… You could never admit to him that your mind still craved the man that had cast you into the streets where Thomas found you.

It'd been months since you last went to the capital. You avoided it as much as possible; the memories were just too much. Many of the townspeople still knew your face, knew your past. Their looks and whispers broke you every step you took down those busy streets. In the years since you’d left, you only visited a handful of times. 

Thomas had needed supplies for his farm and had asked you to spend the day with him. You couldn’t bring yourself to turn down another trip; you’d run out of excuses to stay behind.

The streets were busier than usual, an excited rumble amongst the crowds made you uneasy. As Thomas began trading with a merchant, you heard chanting and clapping erupt from the crowds. Turning, your heart dropped as you saw the imperial procession emerge from the horizon. Rows of storm troopers marched as the senate stood on the moving platform. A scene you used to know and love, now filling your heart with anxiety and dread.

Falling to the floor, gripping your temples as pain shot through your brain, your knees collided with the cold stone of the pavement. A faint cry left your lips, alerting Thomas and causing him to drop just as quickly to your side. You knew what the pain was, and you feared what was going to follow. Shaking and crying, you couldn’t push the pain out. You were too close; his power had a greater effect when you were in such close proximity. Too scared to fight it anymore, you gave up and allowed the pain to fill you, ears ringing as tears spilled from your eyes. The ringing forcing your eyes shut as you barely registered the hands of your loved one embracing you and picking you up from the floor.

Thomas took you down a side road; he saw the pain in your eyes and knew being amongst the crowds would make it worse. The pain only grew; you knew he was looking for you. Thomas held your hands to steady you as you leant against the wall, breath slowing slightly but not enough to hide your nerves. “Darling what's wrong, what’s happened? Do I need to get help?” Thomas cooed. His careful and loving nature warmed your heart, calming your nerves for a brief minute as your eyes met his. But before you had the chance to speak your ears filled with the booming voice you'd tried to forget for so long. Not even the modulator could hide the aggression in his tone, not to you anyway; you knew him too well.

“That won't be necessary,” his shrill voice pierced your ears as the pain in your head dispersed, “I'm here now, my pet.”

Your stomach dropped as your eyes met the dark void of his mask, the image that had plagued you since your departure. Gripping onto Thomas' wrists, you slowly steadied yourself back up into a standing position, not letting go as you turned to the masked figure before you. “Shouldn't you be on that parade, waving to your adoring people? Instead of creeping around the back streets?” Your arms crossed at your chest, confidence growing as the pain vanished. Thomas turned to you, silently willing you to stand down. He knew everything, he knew what happened, but he still feared the man before you just as much as everyone else did. His love for you and your safety outweighed his urge to defend you and fight against the figure that blocked the street in front of you. 

“She's just hurt,” he says as he turns back to the mask, “I apologise for her behaviour, sir.” A leather clad fist clenched at the idea of another man speaking on your behalf, as a mild chuckle escaped from underneath the cold metal. 

“I think you'll find I know her far better than to accept an apology from some peasant boy. Now, what is it you're doing here?” His frame relaxed, leaning against the wall beside him as if he found the whole show amusing.

Those eyes, even behind the mask pierced your soul and rummaged around your brain, hearing every thought and emotion that swelled inside of you. Flashbacks of nights long ago spiralled as he began to approach, slow and calculated steps closing the gap as you felt a hand on your lower back. Thomas tried to reassure you, but you already knew how this was going to go. “Did you miss me, my pet? You’re still just as beautiful as ever… perhaps even more so.” Thomas had had enough, and stepped in front of you, his protective nature taking over. Something you knew he would regret. 

“I’d like to remind you, Emperor, that you are speaking to a lady who is already spoken for. So kindly, respect that and choose your words more carefully.” This sudden confidence shocked you, but also caused a great unrest as you waited for a response. Thomas had always defended you, especially when someone tried to disrespect you because of your past or where you had come from. Your heart stopped as the gloved fists tightened, eyes fixated on the empty space between the two men. The hands slowly raised, one to rest on the saber adorning his waist and the other into the air. As the hand raised, so did Thomas, his own hands shooting to his neck as the weight of the Force clamped down on his throat.

“You've made your point now stop! Don’t do this Kylo.” You shouted, stepping forward and hitting the cold, black chest of the one endangering your... Your... you couldn't even think of the right word; his grip was as tight on your brain as it was on Thomas' neck. As your hands collided with his chest, the mask snapped down to look at you. Just as your eyes met, Thomas dropped to the floor. Hard, laboured breaths came out as he regained composure.

“So brave now, aren't you little one? The years seem to have made you strong my love.” Another chuckle, the noise fuelling your anger. So wrapped up in the tension and proximity between you two, you failed to hear Thomas stand back up and cough, only remembering his presence when he grabbed your arm. 

“It’s time to leave,” he spoke softly, but before you could turn to face him, Kylo spoke. 

“You're so right, it is time you leave. I'm happy to arrange travel back for you while,” his head turned back to you, a hand lightly caressing your cheek “this one follows me back to the imperial tower. I think the time apart has caused her to forget her manners when addressing superiors.” You knew under that mask lived a dark smirk as the words left his mouth. Thomas went to protest, but you knew that would only cause more pain. You flinched away from the hand at your cheek and turned to the man you'd spent the past lonely years with. 

“Please, just go... I promise it'll be ok. I'll be back soon, I love you.” You had to stay; you knew that Thomas’ life would be in danger if you tried to protest anymore. As the words left your mouth, you heard a loud laugh behind you. He was in your head once again; he knew what you felt on the inside, what you wanted to say. Thomas’ eyes filled with dread, but he nodded. He kissed you softly before pushing past; you knew why he did it and it made you smile slightly. You watched as he walked away, wishing you were following behind him. Your eyes turned back to the caped horror that stood between you and your comfortable life. 

“Something the matter pet? Would you rather trail after the peasant?” His head tilted as he watched you, waiting for a response. You simply dropped your head and stared at the ground, unable to think of what to say next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone, Leo here!   
> So, fair warning, things are going to start going very wrong from this point. I will include trigger warnings at the start of any really bad chapters, but for the most part I probably won't. Please bare in mind this story is not a depiction of a healthy relationship - it is toxic and very damaging. Do not read on if you aren't ok with heavy smut, abuse, humiliation, death and all the major bad things in life because its probably coming up somewhere 
> 
> I love seeing comments, on here and on my socials. Reminder, find me @willingsurrender on Instagram and tiktok where I post content about the story and reply to messages. I dop hope to see you all there!


	5. Chapter 5

Footsteps thundered throughout the marble room, as you trailed behind the black cape cascading off the shoulders you used to cling to. Each step, each tap brought back feelings and memories you had long suppressed. “No point trying to hide them, pet, we both know what goes on in that filthy little brain of yours. All the time.” The voice boomed as you entered his chambers.

It was as if you never left; everything was exactly as it had been the day you packed your bags and fled. Each drawer and light, each decoration and chair. All the same. Your feet instinctively wandered the halls, looking around at all the features you’d grown so used to in your time there. The door slamming behind you broke your stunned train of thought, causing your body to turn around sharply. Your heart practically jumped out of your chest as your eyes finally met his. 

His eyes, not the mask this time. 

Pulling you in and hypnotising you, your body lifting from the floor as the Force carried you across the room. You couldn't speak, your mind racing as his eyes shone like stars in the darkest galactic skies. Once again, a hand caressed your cheek. But this time there was no leather barrier between your yearning skin and his. “Oh, my darling, how I've missed you...” a long sigh left his smiling lips and hit your face “my beautiful sweet girl. It's been far too long since I felt that mouth of yours.” His thumb grazed over you bottom lip as his eyes glistened with a devilish gleam. Your head was telling you to jump back, thoughts of Thomas strong but fleeing as you became lost in his eyes. His smile grew, as if he saw the other man disappear from your mind. “Now, now pet, what am I to do with you? All for myself once again. All alone, and a lesson that needs to be learnt.”

A sudden wave of sense filled you, as you stepped backwards and straightened yourself out, arms once again crossing as your face hardened. “I don't know what you think is going to happen. I only came here so you wouldn't kill Thomas on the street. We both know you're good at that.” His smile faded with the last sentence rolling from your tongue, replaced with an aggravated frown. As he stepped forward, your face hardened. “You wanted me gone, remember? You're the one that broke me and forced me to leave the life I loved, the person I loved. So, don't you dare stand there smiling like nothing happened, your excellence. How can YOU even think I would let you near me after all you've put me through, you self-righteous j-“. 

Before you could finish, his hands wrapped around your neck and his lips crashed into yours. The sensation and force of his movements nearly knocking you off your feet. One hand left your neck and snaked around your waist, clasping your bodies together as the kiss intensified. A muffled moan left you as your hand tugged at the black locks falling into your eyes as they cascaded down his forehead, a growl leaving Kylo's lips as you added more strength to your hand’s movements.

A firm grip found your arse as your body was led to the large bed towards the back of the room. As your knees hit the edge, your hands pushed against his chest causing the kiss to break. “I can't do this, Kylo... Please don't make me do this.” Your name fell softly from his lips as he smiled, tightening his grip on your throat. 

“My love, I'm not doing anything your thoughts aren't begging me to do,” his mouth fell to your neck, leaving large open mouth kisses up and down. A sudden sharp bite to your skin causes you to moan and pull hard on his cape, ripping it from his shoulders and throwing it to the floor. “See, your whole body is pleading for me, screaming my name. How could I deny it? My sweet thing.” You couldn't find the words anymore, your body failed you and your resistance depleted. All that left your mouth was 

“Kylo...” as you fell onto the bed.

Your arms pinned above your head by the invisible hands you knew too well, the man you once loved looming over you on his knees. This was how you remembered him; this was how you missed him. Once again, that sly smile crept across his mouth, “I've missed this view too”. He leant down, lips caressing your ear as his hands groped your chest, “I know you want me love. I know you do, but I know your head is hurting. Because of him...” the smile faded slightly. Your eyes flickered between his lips and his eyes, mind exploding with hundreds of questions and thoughts, but your body reacting to every grope and movement of his hands. As your focus faltered, Kylo's face softened and he sat up. “You want answers my dear, I know. You want to talk it out, you want to understand. But darling,” he sighed “you know I'm no good with words, and when I have you like this” he paused, bit his lip and whispered your name, “I just can't think of anything other than your eyes rolling back as I ruin you.”

Your cheeks flushed red, but you looked away and sat up, pushing him off. “I can't... Thomas, he loves me. He's been so good to me”. You looked at the floor, trying to focus anything other than the eyes that were burning holes into you as you spoke. “He looked after me, treated me like I was his entire galaxy, when you cast me aside as if I were nothing...” Your eyes flickered up for a second to catch his, and you wished they hadn't. Anger, pure anger was all that shone through. His fists clenched at your sides; vision trained on every movement you made. This was the face you saw in your nightmares, the face you feared the most, but before you could let the fear overwhelm you, your tongue began to race. “I was loyal, I was supportive. I gave my everything to you for as long as I was by your side, in every capacity. When I needed you, when I was scared and hurt, you threw me away. Do you remember what you said that day? Well, do you?!” Your voice began to raise as your eyes filled with tears. Kylo stood, turning his back, and walking over to the window, resting one hand on the glass. “Do you remember? Or shall I remind you? Because I haven’t forgotten, I could never forget. Those words have plagued me every day since,” you shouted as you stood from the bed. His silence only made your anger grow. "Your weakness exposes me, you said. How can I lead them when you are such a liability? You told me that I was a burden, that I made your leadership a joke, remember that?!" 

Before you could continue, the invisible hand crushed your throat and launched you towards Kylo, his figure unchanging as he stared out over the world he had created. As you began to cough and your legs started kicking, he turned to look at you, stone cold expression across his face. “You think I don't know,” his voice was low and calm, but every sentence made it grow. Each word becoming harsher and ending with a growl, “you think I've been able to forget? You think I haven't spent every night, in our bed, reliving the moment my world, no, my UNIVERSE walked out of the door?” He turned to you, eyes locking with your own as your vision became blurry. The lack of oxygen beginning to set in as your fight for freedom began to fail. “Don't you ever, ever dare question me again. Do you understand?” His last sentence barely audible, snarl too strong as rage filled his entire body. You could barely speak, opting to try a faint nod instead. As you did, you throat was released and you dropped into a pile on the floor. Eyes weeping and breath stuttering, you looked up through the tears to the man stood above you. He simply growled and turned back to the window. Your heart broke all over again, as if you'd travelled back to that very day and experienced it once more. A fist smashed against the window panel, startling you as you crawled backwards. He glanced at you, before shaking his head. Forehead pressed against the window, Kylo closed his eyes and clenched his fists. “You break me, my dear, you effect everything I do. I never stopped watching you, listening... I never looked away, even when his hands were on you and your lips were on him. When you tried to shut me out, I couldn't...”

Your eyes glued to him, watching every movement and every breath that hit the glass. Your heart was screaming to reach out and hold him, but your body wouldn't move. “My love, my life... in the arms of another. And I put her there, I did!” Fists connected with the window once again as a tear fell down his cheek. “I felt helpless, like I had to choose between my life’s work and my future with the woman I loved, the woman I love… You don’t understand; it was too early, too poorly timed. I nearly lost my position because of what happened. Everything we had built was slipping from my hands.”

You couldn't hold back anymore, you stood and slowly began to approach him, eyes trained, watching for any change. Your hands reached out and rubbed over his shoulders, settling on them as you slowly turned him round. “I thought it was best,” his eyes didn't leave the floor as you made him face you, “I thought you'd be safer and I'd be better, I thought you were better without me.... but I...” his voice cracked as your hand reached up and cupped his cheek, wiping away the tear. Any anger that had filled his body had gone, replaced now with a dark sadness that you’d only seen a handful of times. “I am lost without you, my dear. I, I am sorry”. His eyes met yours, his hand covering your own on his face as the other landed on your hip. You couldn't speak, so you simply continued to stroke his cheek, waiting for his next sentence. “You ground me and make me whole; you are my power and my balance... I need you”. 

Your face began to move towards his, eyes flickering to his lips before meeting his eyes again. Before you connected once again, a faint whisper fell from his lips. “Stay with me... Please…” Your lips answered on their own, lightly connecting to his. This time, it was soft and meaningful. It wasn't hungry or flustered. This time was healing, like the touch of his lips fixed all the cracks in your heart that'd festered for years. Your arms wrapped around his neck as his once again reached around your hips. There was no lust, or dominance. In your arms was a man who wanted to give you everything in the universe because he needed you to stay. A muffled cry crawled from his lips and into yours, soft tears meeting your cheek as you felt the man you loved crumble under your touch. The time apart had left him broken; with no one he trusted with his emotions, years of pain and anger had festered until this point. Kylo was known to be emotionless and cruel, but you knew him better than that. You knew he was broken deep down, that a lifetime of pain and suffering had left scars that may never truly heal no matter how much love you gave him.

You wanted to stay, you had to stay. For him. But it wasn't that easy. Your mind once again wandered to Thomas and to the life you had built in the time you'd been away. Kylo broke the kiss and rested his forehead on yours, “I know what you're thinking... I, I need you to stay... I won't let you leave again. You won't leave, you won't.” The tone in his voice changed, now stern, and almost harsh, sending goose bumps across your body. The shift from pain, back to anger was evident. You looked down, and then back to his eyes, simply nodding.


	6. Chapter 6

He didn't take it well... but, how could he? 

Never in his wildest imagination did Thomas expect that one simple journey into the capital would cost him so much. The man who picked you up when you were broken and gave you a home, now sat in silence as you cried in front of him. Thomas didn’t shout or scream like Kylo would, he didn’t fight or grab you. He simply looked to the floor as you explained what happened. All the emotions whirling round your head spewed from your mouth in an inferno of pain and confusion. How could he be happy to see you leave him for the same man who broke you so long ago? It was hard and you tried to stop the hurting as much as you could, tried to buffer the heartbreak. 

The last thing you wanted was to hurt the beautiful soul that stood before you, but Thomas could barely look at you as you packed the last of your things. You tried to make him understand, but even you didn't fully know why he had such a control over your heart. Thomas was perfect, he was the kind of man any woman would pray for. You had him in your arms but willingly were about to walk away and give it all up for someone who had turned his back to you in the past. Your eyes now red with tears, reaching out to him one final time but bringing your hand back again after catching the look in his eye. You walked to the door and sighed. 

“I will always remember you; I will always think of you and be so thankful I had you in my arms and my heart. But I must do this, he needs me. Too many people depend on him… and he depends on me. If you ever need help, or find yourself nearby, I’d love to see you…” Your eyes met his, then drifted to the floor before finally opening the door and leaving.

His last words spun around your head for hours, even after returning to the tower. 'I hope he gives you the moon and the stars, because that's all I ever wanted for you. But be careful because he was the reason you ran into my arms to begin with...' 

The last line rattled you, causing a flurry of emotions as you walked into the bathroom within Kylo's chambers. He had gone to a meeting a while after you'd arrived, making sure you were settled and comfortable before making his way, leaving you with just your thoughts. They kept repeating in your head as the warm water finally met your naked skin, 'He was the reason you ran...'

Lost in thought, you didn't hear the door to the bathroom open or the footsteps coming towards you. Finally snapping out of your trance when a cold hand gripped your waist, you spun to see Kylo stepping under the water with you. His naked body was something that always made your heart flutter, and this was the first time you could enjoy it since reuniting. While your eyes wandered his pale frame, his were fixed to your face as if he was studying you. His head tilted slightly, reading your thoughts like a novel. When your eyes finally made their way up to his, you knew what he was hearing. His hands began stroking your waist, softly digging into the skin, and pushing you against the cold tile wall behind you. You bit your lip and placed your own hands on his chest, fingers running over the scars that littered his skin like a constellation. “My pet couldn't wait for me before she got naked, could she?” You knew he was avoiding what he'd heard, trying instead to lose himself in your body. “I've missed this view so much, so fragile and beautiful. Like you'd break if I was too rough...” his lips connected with your neck just underneath your ear, leaving feather light kisses between each word. “Let's see how much it takes to break you”. Closing your eyes, your head fell back against the wall exposing more skin for his lips to assault. It didn't take long before his teeth began digging into your flesh, covering you in purple marks that would flourish the next day. You belonged to him once again, and he wanted to make sure everyone knew. Your moans only spurred him on, his hips slowly rolling into yours and he growled against you neck.

“Kylo, please just... don't tease me.” You pulled on his hair and ground your hips in time with his, desperate for friction. His lips paused, and his head rose to meet your eye level. 

“Or what,” he cooed “you'll run away?” Your breath caught in your throat, and your eyes locked with his. You knew what he meant, what he’d heard inside your mind. A heat crept up your neck and into your cheeks, the redness causing him to smirk. “You're not going anywhere pet, never again” and with that his lips crushed yours, teeth clashing in a bid to bite and smother your lips with his. Your arms were glued to the wall above your head by the familiar invisible restraint, as Kylo's nails dug into the flesh of your thighs. He brought your legs to his waist, and instinctively your legs wrapped tightly around him. “You want me, do you? You want me to fuck you now, like this? All soaking and whimpering for me, slut”. His sentence was cut short by moans and whimpers falling from you as his thumb moved from your thigh to the walls of your mound, threatening to touch your clit. His lips found your neck again, leaving your mouth free to cry out and whimper for him. 

“Kylo please just fuck me, please…” Your hips bucked up to meet his hand as it circled your sensitive nub, refusing to give you the pleasure you desperately craved.

“Oh, gods I've missed the sound of you begging” his hips roughly thrusted into yours, causing a whine to pass your lips and your head to drop back. “Talk to me you beautiful little slut, make me need to be inside you. Tell me what you want, who you want inside you.” Your mind was shutting down; the sensation of the water mixed with the growing heat between your legs and the hard throbbing of his cock pressed against your folds was becoming too much. “Beg me bitch” he growled against your skin, biting harshly on your shoulder. That was all you needed to break, words spilling from you like a fountain. 

“Kylo, baby please. Please fuck me, break me, ruin me. I need you inside me, filling me. No one fills me like you do, so please just do it.” You could feel the smirk against your neck, and without warning your hips smashed against the wall with the force of him finally entering you.

“No one fills you like me, right?” He growls, forehead leaning on yours forcing you to look into his eyes. “No one fucks you like I do, no one. Right?” His hips began thrusting at a violent pace, your eyes rolling into the back of your head. “That's it, give in to me. Let me take over your whole body. My love,” his nails scratched your thighs as his thrusts sped up, “you will always be mine and no one else's”. Your arms fighting the Force that pins them in place, longing to rake your nails across his back. 

“Kylo, please...” You could barely speak, “let me hold you, let me feel you. I want to touch you.” He smiled at you, kissing your lips softly and nodding. Your arms dropped to your sides as the Force disappeared. Immediately, you dug your nails into his back, catching the scars that lived there. A low groan erupted from his lips, eyes closing as his hips faltered. He's always loved the pain your nails brought him, the rough lines like pleasure trails charging his thrusts.

It was your turn to smirk, scratching over the raised lines you'd created. Both of you now moaning and whimpering from the sensation of your bodies moulding into one.

Your mind cleared of all worries and thoughts, instead it filled with the man in front of you. How he felt, how he looked. The smells, the touches, the sounds. It was all you could focus on, and he knew it. He loved it; it drove him wild. A hand dropped to your clit and began rubbing furious circles against it, causing your whole body to jolt forward and collide with his chest. Your moans became louder and more erratic as the pleasure he was causing drove you insane. One hand tangled into his hair, whilst the other continued digging into the skin on his back. With one hard tug, you brought his head back. It was your turn to leave your mark; the lines on his back just weren't enough for you. An evil smirk adorned his face as he let you cover his neck and shoulder in long, hard kisses. Your teeth nipping at his skin, his hips jolting harder with every bite. “That's it my princess, you know that I am yours. You know I only want you. This pussy is mine; this body is mine” the circles on your clit sped up, “this mind is mine, isn't it?” You simply growled and nodded against his skin, tugging harder on his hair. This pressure against his scalp pulled a deep moan from the back of his throat.

“Kylo, I'm so close. I'm so close please just let me cum. I need to so, so bad” Your forehead fell onto his shoulder as your arms let go of his hair and wrapped around his neck, clinging to him as if he'd disappear if you let go.

He didn't speak, he simply rested his head on yours and sped up. Both so close, both desperate to please the other after so long without. You couldn't hold on anymore, you knew you would explode if you didn't release soon.

“Cum for me darling, scream my name... Let the people know their princess is back. Let them know that their leader has his heart back. All I want is to please you my love, give you everything this universe has. Fuck, yes baby. Let them know you’ve come home”. You didn't expect something so sincere, and it made your climax even more explosive. As you unravelled, his name fell from your lips over and over. Screams and moans erupted from you as Kylo thrusted viciously into you, chasing his own high. You gripped his hair and bit his shoulder as your aftershock began rippling through you, the pain sensation causing him to shoot his hot load into you. His body shook and his teeth dug into your skin, breaking through until the area bruised. Groans fell from his lips, your name rolling off the tongue as though it was only meant to be said by him. The pleasure and love in your heart brought tears to your eyes as you clung to Kylo, afraid to let go after missing his body for so long.

As the shocks began to wear off, you both stilled. Kylo's arms dropped your legs slowly and instead began stroking your sides as he felt you cry into his shoulder. You couldn't help yourself, your sobs flowed out of you and refused to stop. Muffling the noises in his chest, your hands rested in fists against him. Kylo couldn't move, he didn't know what to do, or what you wanted from him. He simply held you and swayed slowly, his chin resting on top of your head and hands running up and down your back. The tenderness of his touch calmed you, the feeling of him holding you made your heart feel whole.

After a minute of allowing you to calm, Kylo turned the water off and slowly led you back to the bedroom with a towel wrapped gently around your small frame. He carefully settled you on the bed and waved his hand, the blinds slowly closing as he laid you down. Your tears had stilled and instead a small yawn escaped your lips, your eyes blinking slowly as the fatigue took over. “Oh, my sweet little girl, so tired. So beautiful.” His lips gently fell on your forehead, leaving sweet and tender kisses as you got comfortable. Waiting eagerly, you close your eyes and prepared to feel his warm body against yours. But after a minute of nothing, your eyes opened to see him fully dressed and stood by the door.

You sat up and tilted your head, but before you got the chance to question him, he spoke softly. “I wish I could stay, but there's an issue on the outskirts of town that I need to oversee. It won't take long, I promise. I'll be back before you wake, my princess.” That name, that name he uses for you could cause your heart to explode. You simply nodded and settled back down. Of course, a little disappointment washed over you, feeling the cold space around you, but you knew it had to be like that sometimes. You saw a flash of sadness in his eyes before he turned and left; you knew he wanted to stay as well. As silence takes over the room, your eyes slowly flutter shut once more. It'd been so long since you'd slept in this bed and yet it felt so familiar; so right.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey lads, I'm pretty drunk right now... lol, so have 2 chapters at once! Little trigger warning here, this is where shit really starts to hit the fan. So please ready with caution, and only proceed if you are ready to deal with trauma, mental and physical abuse as well as degradation and humiliation. You've been warned! Enjoy my lovelies

Your peaceful slumber was interrupted by muffled shouting from outside the suite. You recognised the voice to be Kylo but couldn't make out what he was saying. As you sat up, the doors blew open and he came storming in, mask adorned and saber in hand. You covered your still naked body with the bedsheets and watched as he began pacing up and down, unsure if he'd even noticed you. A young man came to the door with a data pad, trying to speak as calmly as possible as Kylo raged and began swinging the saber at the walls.

You flinched and looked to the officer, who had just noticed your presence. His eyes travelled up and down you, examining the skin exposed to him while the sheets swayed from the force of Kylo's swinging. His eyes felt familiar to you, as if you’d locked gaze with them before. As if he sensed what was happening, Kylo froze and turned to the man. “Something you want boy?” He slowly began walking towards him, saber still lit in his hand. You tried to calm him, 

“Love, is everything ok?” He simply lifted his finger to you, silencing you with his eyes fixated on the now visibly terrified person in the doorway.

“Erm, y... yes sir I... I wanted to give you the f... full report on the a... att...” Kylo silenced him as well. 

“No, no, no, that's not what I was referring to,” his gaze transferred between you and the trembling figure at the door, “you seemed to be so fixated on the lady in the bed, so tell me... is there something you want?” It was at this point you realised who was at the door. It was the same man that had tried to flirt with you in your first month at the capital. The one that Kylo had scared off before he was able to ask you out. The saber lifted, now pointing directly at the man’s throat. You jumped up, making sure the blanket was secured around you. 

“Kylo stop this now! Leave him alone he meant no harm”. As the word left your mouth, the mask snapped round to face you, saber following slowly as he stalked towards the bed. 

“Oh, I should've known. Little slut like you, you do love the attention of any man who gives it to you. Don't you?!” His rage boomed throughout the room as the tip of the red beam drew dangerously close to your lips. “You address me as Emperor Ren, do you understand?” Too fearful to speak, knowing no way of getting past so much rage, you slowly sunk back down onto the bed. Your head nodded and then bowed slowly, unable to look up. The warmth radiating from the saber vanished from your face as it moved back towards the officer at the door. Kylo edged forward again, looking the shaking mess of a person up and down. “That, is mine,” he stated, saber swinging towards you and then returning to the man, “you do not look at her, you do not think about her, you do not acknowledge her without my permission. Do you understand boy?” The saber contacted the wall just by the officer’s head, causing you both to flinch. A quick nod satisfied Kylo’s questions, as he waved to signal the officer to leave. Within seconds the door was slammed shut and you were left alone with the masked anger. Tears began falling from your face as you laid down and turned away from the man now staring at you from the doorway. You heard the saber turn off and the clips of his helmet undo but refused to turn around. Muffled sobs left you once again, only this time you didn’t have his warm body to comfort you. This time your eyes spilled sadness and regret instead of relief. 

And he knew it, he could hear what you were saying in your head. You felt the mattress dip as Kylo sat at the edge of the bed, his back facing you as he looked out the window. Frozen in fear and pain, you couldn’t bring yourself to turn around, or speak. Instead, your mind ran with thoughts. ‘How could you say that to me? I left a loving and happy life behind for you, again… and this is the way you see me?’ The tears wouldn’t stop falling, your sobs the only noise in the room. As your mind raced, Kylo sighed and stood up, walking into another room, and shutting the door.

A few moments later, Kylo emerged again free of his armour dressed only in the trousers he usually slept in. He didn’t speak, simply climbing into the bed next to you. Feeling his hot breath on the back of your neck, you knew he was watching you. “I… we lost a lot today,” he spoke softly, waiting for you to reply or acknowledge him but you wouldn’t move, “men, supplies, a lot. And it was because I trusted idiots with a task that I should’ve known was above them.” His hand touched your back, gently running his fingers up and down your spine. “Worthless, spineless… the lot of them,” as he spoke, he moved closer to you, silently registering the way your body reacted to him. You knew he was trying to apologise, but he couldn’t bring himself to say it. “I’m not used to you being back, pet… not used to turning off my anger. When you were gone, everything lit a fire of rage within me; no one was safe from it. It will take time for me to adjust again.” You didn’t want to push him away, but you needed better than what he was giving. In your head, you simply said 

‘I am not here to be your punching bag. I am not going to stay if this is what I get. And you can’t even apologise…’. His arm wrapped tightly around you, bringing you flush against his chest. You finally turned to look at him, noses nearly touching as you stared in each other’s eyes. 

“I know pet, I know”. The final words to leave his mouth before he closed his eyes and embraced you tightly. The smell of melting metal filled the room, the faint glow of saber marks still apparent in the walls. You nuzzled your head into his neck, feeling his body relax as your small hand rested on his arm. It wasn’t enough, but it was a lot from him, and you knew that. As you drifted back off to sleep, this time in his arms, you couldn’t help but fear the choice you had made.

A few days had passed since the incident and things had been tense. All throughout the tower, a nervous energy buzzed as plans were being made to counter the issues to the south. Kylo had spent most days in meetings or personally checking military tactics, leaving you alone for a lot of the time. His words didn't leave you, as you sat by the big window looking out over the city. Neither did the ones Thomas left you with. They mixed and filled your mind with doubt.

The city was beautiful, it was so vibrant, and the people seemed happy. It was so different to the war-torn mess that sat here many moons ago, before Kylo rebuilt. You knew how much it all meant to him, to finally sit at the top and rule over his people. But you felt like it would never be enough. And you, would never be enough. 

As the thoughts carried by a sigh left you, you began to feel a tension around your throat. Before you knew it, you shot into the air with the pressure growing tighter. Still facing the window, gasping for air, you felt the cold metal of his mask against your shoulder. “What have I said to you about questioning me? Pet.” He spat the last word, clearly angered by what he'd heard roam your mind during your time alone. You couldn't answer, as the pain in your neck grew tighter like he wanted to squeeze every bit of oxygen from you. “You still think of that peasant boy when you're sat in front of all this luxury. All this, that I give you, and yet your mind still goes to him.” His free hand tangled into your hair, pulling your head back harshly so he could see your face. “And you say I'm the one who will never be satisfied... hmm” he chuckled and threw you onto the bed. The Force leaving your throat as you struggle to regain your breath.

“What is wrong with you?” You panted, rubbing your throat as your eyes met the harsh void of the mask. He simply laughed and walked over, hands resting on the bed in front of you. 

“You. My dear, are what's wrong with me.” You tried to speak again but was silenced by a gloved hand covering your mouth. “I wouldn't advise that; you don't want your punishment to become worse now. Do you?” Kylo stood once more, hands moving to free himself of his trousers. A single leather finger beckoned you over as his hardening cock sprung from its constraints. Edging closer, your eyes followed his gloved hand capturing his member and pumping slowly. A groan, barely audible through the modulator, met your ears as his head tilted. He watched as you moved towards him, as if he was surveying prey.

“Your mouth has gotten worse pet, too long without me teaching you how to speak to your Emperor. Now,” he lifted your chin with his finger until your eyes met, “open for me slut.” Mouth open, tongue dangling past your lips, you readied yourself for what was about to happen. As his thumb ran over your top lip and pressed against your waiting tongue, you couldn't help but close your eyes and whimper softly. It didn't take long for the digit against your tongue to be replaced with his now throbbing piece. The tip just gently grazing the back of your mouth, as he thrusted in slowly. “Let's put that filthy little whore mouth to good use, shall we?” he chuckled and collected your hair in his hand before completely filling your mouth. Nose connecting to the small hairs that littered the bottom of his torso, your throat opened for him as if it wanted this as much as he did. 

Kylo began to thrust at a villainous pace, tears forming in your eyes as you choked on him. The vibrations causing him to groan and pull your hair, his cock working in and out of your mouth, chasing a release. “Oh gods, that's it slut. You love to take me like this, don't you? Love wrapping those pretty little lips around me while I fuck your face.” You moaned and nodded, unable to deny how much pleasure this gave you as well. Your left hand grasped the base of cock, pumping what you couldn't manage. Your right hand slithered into your own panties; a desperate whine left you as your finger grazed your aching clit. 

A static laugh erupted from the mask above you, as your hand was removed from your longing nub. “Sluts like you don't get to feel good when they've been bad.” His hands found your head once again, one tangling in your hair and the other squeezing your neck. Stars began forming before your eyes; you could barely breathe. Arms becoming weak, they dropped to your side as you focussed on trying to get any air into you. “Oh fuck, I love having you like this. You know I can take whatever I want, and if I want to, I can take your breath from your lungs if you’re a bad girl again.” The hand on your throat tightening, cutting off your windpipe entirely. You tried to cry out, but Kylo was too consumed with lust and anger to hear you. His thrusts became harsh and erratic, nearing his release as he pulled your hair once again. The world began turning black as you slowly slipped out of consciousness, the last thing you remember was Kylo's member falling from your mouth and hot spurts of cum landing on you as you fell backwards onto the bed. All too much for you, you fell into a deep sleep, body trembling as it finally inhaled much needed air.


	8. Chapter 8

You woke up to a quiet room. Your face had been cleaned and wiped of any evidence of what had taken place. You were resting on the mountain of pillows with the covers firmly tucked around you. Glows of saber burns were evident in the walls, as if he’d lost control entirely once you’d collapsed. 

Even in his fit of rage, he looked after you, cleaned you and let you rest. It almost felt like what happened was a dream, or more specifically a sick nightmare. But you knew it was real, because as you turned to the mirror that stood tall by the bed, the red marks around your neck solidified what you went through. Fear washed over you; he had bruised and ravaged you. He had let himself be so consumed in anger that your wellbeing didn't matter, and you collapsed under his hands. How could this happen? How could he do that to you?

How were you meant to stay here, stay with him, when he treated you like this? He hurt you and wasn’t even around when you awoke to see if you were alright. You began thinking of all the ways you could get away, working on a plan to escape the command tower and reach safety outside of the city. While your head said run, your heavy heart weighed you down; you knew you didn’t want to leave, it was just fear.

Footsteps echoed from the hallway and your head snapped towards the door, the man who'd caused such pain and fear stood with his head pointing to the ground. No armour, no mask. Just a man full of shame exposed to you.

He'd heard you; you knew it.

In his hand, a single red flower lay limp at his side as his eyes finally left the floor to meet you. Tears streamed down your cheeks, heartbeat racing as you were frozen with fear. He began to close the distance, slowly and carefully making his way over to the bed. Every step cautious, until his knees met the edge. “I brought you this...” he placed the flower softly on the bed, your mind raced as you registered it. This wasn't just any flower; this grew on your home planet. You hadn't seen one in years; you couldn't even comprehend how he'd got it for you. But he did.

You met his eyes and your heart shattered. Never had you seen such pain in them, such fear in the man who haunted nightmares throughout the galaxy. Your words scared him, as his actions scared you. No words were exchanged for a period, each of you simply lost in the emotion of the other’s eyes. 

Looking away, you reached for the flower and brought it to your face. The smell so nostalgic, your body finally relaxed as your breathed in its sweet scent. A broken smile crept across your face as you wiped a tear from your cheek, your eyes locked on the beautiful reminder of home in your hand. Your mind began to wander, you couldn't remember ever telling Kylo about your home. “You didn't, love” he spoke quietly as he sat on the bed, still keeping his distance “but your dreams speak for you. So beautiful, such happiness as you dreamt of those fields.” He smiled slightly as you looked up at him. “Pack a bag, we leave in an hour.” And with that, he stood and left the room. Your brow furrowed as you watched him walk away, wiping the last tear away and climbing off the bed. 

Holding the flower as if it was a child, you delicately placed it in a glass of water and proceeded to follow what you'd been told. With no idea of what was happening, you packed a few essentials and changes of clothes into a small bag and then walked to the door. Kylo stood at the exit of the chambers, armour fully in place and a bag in his hand. He nodded to you and walked out; you instinctively began to follow him.

The ship was new, sleek. It's engine almost silent as it took off. You'd never been in such a ship before, taking it all in as you sat in the passenger seat beside Kylo who had decided to pilot himself, leaving the two of you alone for the duration of the trip. 

The stars shooting past you as the ship left the atmosphere always mesmerized you, no matter how many times you saw it. Your hand touched the window as you watched the galaxy unfold before your eyes, Kylo glancing over and smiling at the childlike wonder in your expression. “Not even the stars can rival your beauty, you know” he said as he turned back to the controls, flicking the switch to autopilot, and standing from his seat. You smiled lightly and watched as he walked towards you, his hand reaching out for you to take. One last look out at the stars, before taking his hand and standing. As you stood in front of him, your hand left his and reached up to the mask still on his head. The clasps hissed as you removed them and pulled the helmet away from his face, long black curls falling as you did. Looking into his eyes was just as wondrous as the stars that passed you on your journey. There was a veil of pain that made them shine in ways you’d never seen eyes sparkle before. No one could look into your soul the same way those eyes did. You placed the mask on your seat and looked back up into those eyes, every time you did was like the first. 

“I still don't know where we're going” you muttered, eyes falling to the floor and hands fiddling with your clothes. You didn’t know how to act; wounds still fresh and no time to process what happened. 

“My pet, if I told you that would ruin the surprise wouldn't it?” He slowly lifted your head with a finger under your chin and leant down to leave a soft kiss on your lips before walking out of the cabin. The touch was gentle, but the feeling lingered as you picked up his mask and sat back in your chair. Such cold, harsh features sketched into the metal. Your fingers followed the lines across it, examining every scratch and mark.

Music began to play from outside of the cabin, causing you to step out, hoping to find where it was coming from. Kylo stood in the middle of the hull, once again with a hand extended to you. Walking over, you hesitated; looking up at him before giving in and moving closer. You placed the mask on the side and took his hand, feeling him spin you round in time with the music and then bring you to his chest. Silence between you, as you danced to the soothing sounds of music flowing through the ship. Your hand in his, head on his chest relaxing into the movements. Kylo rested his chin on the top of your head and sighed, holding you tightly against him. “I don't remember the last time we danced...” You said, almost too quietly to hear. He smiled and spun you once again, this time your back was pressed to his chest as you swayed to the melody. 

“You still fit so well against me my love, as if you were made just for me. Not even the years apart could change that.” Kisses following each word, starting at your temple, and moving down your neck. A small flinch caused his lips to pause, his eyes looking to you as he moved away from your neck and back up to your cheek. A satisfied hum left your lips and you head rocked back onto his shoulder, hands laying on top of his at your waist.

The moment was so tender, so peaceful, it was as if all your troubles and problems melted away into the darkness of space. You turned to face him again, arms wrapping around his neck as you got on your toes to place a small kiss on his nose. He chuckled slightly and embraced you, face burying into your collarbone and arms so tight around your waist; he almost lifted you from the floor. You held on as your bodies followed the lead of the rhythm flowing from the speakers. A muffled “I love you” fell from your lips as you placed a kiss to his temple and let your lips linger against his skin. You really meant it, for the first time in years you said I love you to a man and meant it. But in your head, you couldn't stop the thought surfacing 'but I'm so afraid of you...'

Kylo stood and rested his hands on your hips, looking into your eyes as he considered what to do or say. You saw the glint of hurt in his eyes as he'd listened to that thought as if it was his own. Before he could speak, the music stopped and was replaced with a beeping noise to signal your destination was close. He released you from his touch and took a seat back in the cabin to safely land the ship. Your eyes followed him as he left, but quickly focussed onto the approaching planet that came into view. Rushing over to the window, hands pressed against it, you couldn't believe what you saw in front of you. “Home” you whispered, looking down to the planet you spent your childhood on. The planet you hadn't returned to since you joined the Order, after the passing of your parents. There is was, still as beautiful as ever. You walked behind Kylo's chair and placed your hands on his shoulders as his gaze stayed on the screen, but his smile gleamed just for you. “I can't believe this... I...” a tear fell from your cheek as one of his hands took yours and brought it to his lips, light kisses left on each knuckle. 

“Are you happy my dear?” You simply nodded and rested your head on his, unable to speak as your eyes glued to the beautiful red fields that came into view as you descended.

Before exiting, Kylo placed the mask over his head once more. You wish he’d let the world see his beautiful features, but a part of you adored that they were just for you. As you walked down the ramp from the ship, your eyes darted around in every direction; you wanted to take it all in at once. A welcoming crew waited at the bottom of the ramp, saluting their emperor, and waiting for orders. Kylo led on as you simply stared in awe. It was hard to believe where you were, where he’d brought you. The sky was a perfect pink, as the cloud dotted across like freckles. You were escorted to a remote stronghold in the middle of one of the red fields, built as if it was designed for you; like it was something out of one of your dreams. Kylo turned to you before you entered, and simply said “it was, love.”

The insides reminded you of a rustic mountain retreat, much like the ones you spent time in during your early days working for the First Order. Warm and homely, but spacious. The crew had brought your bags to the door and then left, giving you both privacy as you settled in. Senses overloaded; you couldn’t help but spin around as you took it all in. “I don’t understand, w… what is this place?” you turned to Kylo, who had already removed his helmet. 

“We used to dream of somewhere like this together, remember?” he walked over to you and held your hands, “a place for us to get away, to relax and enjoy each other fully.” As his thumbs rubbed over your hands, your eyes looked up to his. 

“When did you do this? How did you...” he smiled and silenced you with a kiss. It was short but sweet, lips parting only slightly as he spoke. 

“Look around darling, explore. This is all for you.” His hands left yours as he walked towards the large fireplace and sat on the sofa that faced it. You thought about following him, but excitement overtook you and you began skipping around the house. Every room a mystery, every detail so thought through. It all felt so familiar to you; like it had fallen directly out of your imagination.

An hour or so of exploring brought you back down to the fireplace where Kylo sat, a smile lazily forming as he saw you approach. “My princess looks happy, is she?” his hand reached to you and guided you onto his lap, your knees falling either side of him. You smiled and nodded, hands resting on his shoulders. The light of the fire created a red hue in the room, highlighting your lover’s features perfectly. He looked so beautiful in this light, so peaceful as his head rested against the sofa and his hands rubbed up and down your thighs. 

“My emperor looks peaceful, is he?” you smiled and leaned closer, noses touching as your hand rested on his cheek. Kylo chuckled and brought his lips even closer to yours. 

“He is, now that his sweet little thing is with him once again. Now that she can see what he does for her, what he wants to give her,” he caught your bottom lip between his teeth and pulled lightly. Your eyes closed and hands moved into his hair, curling the soft waves between your fingers. He smirked as he released you, gently licking your bottom lip before pulling your hips towards his “this is all for you my love, all for you. No one knows this exists but us and the few trusted men that guard it. You can come here whenever you want. It’s yours.” The words absorbed into your heart and soul, soothing you and putting you in a state of pure bliss. You wanted to thank him, wanted to show him how grateful you were and so began leaving soft kisses from his ear to his collarbone.

A long sigh left his lips as his head tilted back further, silently pleading for your touch. Soft pecks became long and slow kisses, bites following as you covered his neck in passionate markings. His hands began digging into your hips, moving them, and making you roll against him. Both of you moaned in unison, the friction becoming taunting as your mouth passed from his neck to his chest. You quickly worked on ridding him of his clothes, but as his hands moved to remove yours, you paused. “Oh, no, no sir,” you grabbed his hands and pinned them above his head, “you’re not the one in control here, you sit back and let me thank you.” A smirk grew on his face as he shrugged and let you guide his hands away from you. Clothes finally removed; your body lowered onto the floor between his legs. Kissing his thighs, your nails scratched down his chest towards his now hardening member.

His hand started creeping towards you, but the stern look in your eyes made them freeze in their tracks. “I said no. You don’t touch, you don’t move,” smiling as you took him in your hand. Kylo’s eyes closed and his head dropped back, hands closing into fists above his head. You knew he couldn’t watch you, because if he did, he wouldn’t be able to hold back. You loved seeing this, the light from the fire intensifying every bead of sweat, every scar that covered his chest. Hand slowly beginning to move up and down, your tongue lapped at his tip, teasing him. His eyes clamped shut and teeth bit his bottom lip, a groan escaping as he tried to resist taking over. “You’re so pretty right now, baby boy” his cock grew hard, springing as you used such a gentle pet name. “such a pretty boy…” you smiled up at him as your hand sped up. “Can you open your eyes for me baby boy, can you?” He shook his head, biting his arm as he began to lose himself in the pleasure. “Please baby, please let me see those pretty eyes,” you purred as you began licking at his tip again, hand only going faster as you watched his arms move away from his face. Once your eyes locked, you took him into your mouth as far as you could manage. Kylo’s hands began to twitch, nails digging into his own wrists as his eyes filled with lust. 

“Oh, my love, please just let me touch you.” He bit his lip again and you moaned around him, nodding slowly; you craved his touch. Almost instantly, his large and rough hands gripped your hair and moaned as he tugged at you. This only spurred you on as you sped up your pace, cheeks hollowing as you craved his release. “That’s my good girl, slowly for me… fuck” he rubbed his thumb over your cheek, groaning as he watched his cock fall from your mouth. “Can my princess take her clothes off for me?” he cooed down at you, hands running over your cheeks and back into your hair.

An idea formed in your head and a devilish smirk plastered across your face. He watched you and sat forward, face edging towards yours. “Don’t ever think about it…” he laughed and leant back into the sofa. 

“Or what, pretty boy?” you sat back on your knees, hand stilling at the base of his cock and squeezing. A strangled moan fell from his lips as you applied more pressure to your grip. “I want you to beg for it love, make me want to strip for you” smiling, you twisted your wrist, “don’t you want that baby, in the light of the fire, my naked body moving just for you…” he whined. The leader of the new empire whined under your touch and it made you feel powerful. Your hand slowly began raising and falling on his cock once more. “Come on now my pretty boy, you just have to say it once for me? For your princess”. Your sweet smile broke him, eyes locking on yours as his grip in your hair tightened. 

“P…please just, oh fuck” you squeezed his tip and slapped it, his head shooting backwards and chest rising harshly, “please let me see your body, let me watch you strip. Please.” You couldn’t hold it in, a chuckle left your lips as you stood, looking down at the panting man staring at you.

Your movements were slow and calculated, the look he was giving you fuelling your confidence. Each dip and sway of your hips mesmerized him, his hand moving up and down his member as he watched you eagerly. Shedding your top layers, your hands raised to your clothed breasts and squeezed them, your teeth clamping down on your bottom lip. He groaned as his eyes followed your hands, his own hand speeding up on his throbbing cock. You blew him a kiss, which he caught with his free hand and smirked. The fire roared behind you, giving you the perfect lighting to drive your lover wild. Your hands circled behind you, as you unclipped your bra. But, before it fell, your body quickly turned to place your back to him. A frustrated groan left Kylo’s lips, his hand raising and waving, spinning you around himself. You chuckled and covered your breasts with your hands, sticking your tongue out at him. He shook his head and laughed, biting his lip as he thumbed his tip. Your hands dropped and you walked towards him, resting a hand on each of his knees. “Are you satisfied, emperor?” you placed one hand over his own, halting his movements and smirking. “You seem satisfied, sir.” Your face came closer to his, you finally sitting back down on his lap. Kylo sighed and shut his eyes, head dropping back before focussing on you again.

“Only you can do this to me pet,” he stroked your cheek, “only you could make me ask for what’s rightfully mine.” You smiled and crashed your lips into his, hands tangling in his hair and you rocked against him, hips colliding. Moans erupting from both of you, so much pleasure and love in one moment. His hands left your hips and moved up along your back, but as one rested on your throat you flinched and sat up. The marks from before were still sore, the fear you felt at the time washing back over you. Kylo brought his hands back to your waist and furrowed his brows. You bit your lip and looked away; afraid he’d see the tears forming in your eyes. “My darling,” he whimpered, taking your hands in his and pulling you into a loving embrace, “please, please don’t fear me… the whole galaxy fears me, I rule because of the fear I create in people. But you,” he sighed and shook his head, “I just can’t bear to think of you fearing me too… not like this.” You sighed and rested your forehead on his.

“I’m sorry, I… it just hurts…” you couldn’t look into his eyes, and so just stared down at his chest.

“You know I can hear you love, there’s no point lying. I know what you thought on the ship. You are afraid of me…” he bit his lip and closed his eyes. You found yourself sitting up and dropping your head backwards, hands covering your eyes. 

“I can’t help it, I’m sorry for what I said but I can’t help it. What happened… it did scare me. It hurt me and I never thought you would do that…” You finally looked down at him, his eyes fixed on your neck as his hands rubbed the sides of your stomach. 

“My love I… I can’t explain it, I’m….” his words faltered, and eyes closed. You sighed and stood, picking up your clothes. As the warmth of your body left his, he immediately sat up and reached for your hand. “my love please, don’t leave, I… I’m sorry”. He said it, he finally really said it. You looked at him, broken and fearful below you. 

“I’m not leaving, I… I just don’t want to carry on, not right now.” He simply nodded and stood, walking over and scooping you up into his arms. So strong, so warm. You always felt safe when he held you like this, no matter what had happened. His heartbeat soothing you as you were carried up the stairs and into the beautiful master bedroom. You smiled and nuzzled into his chest; his skin soft against your cheek. Kylo gently climbed into the bed with you still in his arms, laying on his back with you settling onto his chest. Gentle, feather like kisses covered your face as you looked to the man beneath you. Each kiss made your smile grow, fingers playing with a single curl of black hair at his shoulder. 

“Never feel as though you must fear me, please…” his voice was barely above a whisper, hands laying on your hips as you made yourself comfortable on top of him. “You are my life, and I will never let anything happen to you my love. Never.” You nodded, resting your head against his chest, and listening to the soothing sound of his heart.


	9. Chapter 9

The next day was like a dream, you spent the entire day in Kylo’s arms. He wouldn’t leave your side; whatever you wanted he got for you, wherever you wanted to go he was there with you. The suns in the sky meant it was the perfect weather to explore the fields surrounding the barracks. It had been so long since you let your hair down and just enjoyed nature. Kylo had never seen this side of you; so pure and natural. Watching you run through the fields and roll around in the flowers made his love intensify more than he ever expected. Someone so cold never knew this kind of love was possible. It scared him; how much he could lose loving you so much. But it was a risk worth taking.

Snapping him out of his thoughts, you dragged him onto the floor with you, laughing as his shocked face came crashing down on top of you. Propping himself up on his elbows, Kylo laughed and looked down at the radiant smile across your face gleaming up at him. You’d never seen such happiness in his eyes. Dressed in slim fitting causal wear to avoid prying eyes that his usual uniform attracts, he looked normal. He looked human. There had never been a time more sentimental to you, more loving. Pink skies made the glow in your lover’s cheeks gleam brighter than usual, heart raising as you gazed up at him.

Laying there together, you felt an eternity pass and couldn’t think of a better way to spend your time. Kylo leant down and kissed you; slow and passionate, savouring your flavour as if it was the first and last time he’d taste it. Your hands tangled into his hair, legs wrapping around him. He smiled against your lips, one hand by your head to steady him and the other resting on your thigh. You had dreamed of a moment like this; surrounded by beautiful red flowers, holding the man of your wildest fantasies as he kissed you with so much love you felt your souls intertwine.

As he pulled away, your hand cupped his cheek as you smiled up at him. "You look so beautiful like this Kylo... so happy." His smile mirrored yours as he kissed your head. 

"My love, I'm happy because I have you. I was so alone... so lost, for so long. And, then you came into my life. I had everything, but I gave it away. Now, now I'm never letting you go again. I never want to feel the way I felt when you left." 

"Kylo, you won't," your thumb stroked over his cheek as he leant against your touch, his eyes closing as he sighed, "you won't feel like that because I won't let you. I won't let you lose yourself to the dark again. You just need to let me in and tell me if you need me... I'll do anything for you." 

"Anything for you my sweet. With you by my side, I am whole... not even the Maker could tear me away from you. Never again." 

The rest of the day was filled with loving embraces and tender moments. Kylo’s hands never rose above your hips, scared to trigger fear in you the way he did the night before. You appreciated his apprehension; it meant a lot that he would restrain himself to make sure you felt safe with him. 

Nights by the fireplaces relaxed you, laying in the arms of your lover allowed your heart to mend. The warmth of the fire and your bodies tangled together allowed you to sleep better than you had in years. Each day filled your heart with hope for your future together, each night healed any wounds your past had left you with. After a few nights, Kylo had mentioned you would have to head back to the capital soon. You wanted your last night to be special, and so decided you would surprise your love and cook for him. While he slept peacefully on the sofa, tired out from you running circles around him in the fields earlier, you began to prepare the meal you first made him when you moved into the command tower. It was one of his favourite dishes and you knew that it was special to him when you prepared it.

About an hour had passed, and everything was prepared. The last elements were placed into the cooker, so you decided to sneak upstairs and get changed. You wanted it to be a special night, so decided to dress up. As you slowly walked down the stairs, you noticed Kylo had awoken and was watching the fire burn, eyes trained on the way the flames danced. You snuck up behind him, covering his eyes with your hands and kissing his neck. “Hello sleepy head, did I give you too much of a workout today?” You giggled and moved around so your stood in front of him, still covering his eyes. 

“What are you up to pet? I hope you haven’t been naughty while I’ve been resting.” He smiled and reached up to move your hands, lip catching between his teeth as he took in your appearance. “What’s all this for princess?” he smiled and stood, wrapping his arms round your waist, and drinking in your body.

“I decided to do something special, as a thank you,” you smiled and led him to the kitchen, “I made dinner tonight. Sent the helpers home and prepared everything myself.” His head tilted as he scanned the kitchen. Before you could react, he lifted you up and spun you around. 

“You know,” he smiled and put you back onto the floor “if you wanted to say thank you, you could’ve just sucked my dick.” You giggled and hit his chest, a laugh falling from his lips as he kissed your head. “I’m just joking my love, thank you for all of this. You really are my special girl.” The rest of the evening was spent in pleasant conversation and warm embraces. Retiring to the bedroom early, you felt asleep tangled in each other's arms sharing nothing but sheer adoration between you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Little bit of a short one today, but its just a filler. Trust me, things are going to get messy real soon.... hehehe 
> 
> Love you all. Thank you so much for all the support. It really makes my day!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi Guys!! Quick AN here just to say thanks so much for the continuous love and support. This is chapter 10, so we're nowhere near done. As an estimate, we're looking at 46 parts here so please stick around, share, comment and vote! find me on tiktok and instagram as @willingsurrender where we can talk and interact. I'm happy to answer questions or hear your theories about where this is going!

A month had passed since the trip. You quickly got back to how life was before you left all those years ago. A new purpose took over your life; working for the Order again made you feel useful. Like it was where you truly belonged. You helped co-ordinate supply vessels, ran inter-city projects, and helped Kylo in any way he would let you. 

Kylo had become less cautious with you, returning to his usual touchy and provocative self, even going so far as to become affectionate in public, something that was new but exciting to you. He’d have you on his lap during meetings, lips on your neck while the officers around you bickered or offered reports. The mask had begun to disappear in meetings; trusted colleagues now able to look upon the face of their leader. Kylo claimed it was because he felt more assertive when he could look into their eyes, but you knew it was because it gave him the chance to show off how much you melted as his lips touched your skin. He thrived off of the looks of jealousy, of anger, that the officers sent his way as he claimed you whenever he pleased. In town, his hands would slip down your waist and rest on your arse as you talked to locals, squeezing and groping the flesh as you tried to keep composed. Things felt so normal and after how relaxed the getaway had made you, you felt unstoppable. The Order was thriving; new planets joining and pledging allegiance every day, bringing in new tasks and opportunities.

One day you were asked to attend a public event as a representative of the emperor. It was the opening of a new inter-planet marketplace, where merchants from all over could trade alongside each other. As you roamed the lanes between the carts, your eyes fell on an all too familiar smile. Thomas approached you, eyes shining as he embraced you. You couldn’t believe it was him, hugging him tightly and smiling. You were so pleased to see him, taking so much pleasure in catching up on everything that had happened since you last saw each other. 

Your words spun tales of progress and hope, much like the stories you used to tell the children. It was just like spending time with an old friend; someone who was so familiar to you putting you at ease. As you lost yourself in conversation, you felt one of the storm troopers who had accompanied you to the event tap your shoulder. They said that they felt as though your actions were not serving the interest of the emperor and asked you to immediately return to the tower. You rolled your eyes and told them to leave, enjoying spending time with someone who brought you happiness outside of your lover. You weren’t going to be ordered around my two men who were there to serve you.

Walking around the newly built space, you spent the next hour with Thomas, reminiscing on the good times you’d shared. It was refreshing to speak to someone outside of your normal lifestyle. You'd learnt he hadn't moved on, favouring putting all his time into his work on the farm. It made your heart ache slightly to think of him alone, but you knew how much the farm meant to him as so knew he was happy.

Turning the corner to exit the market, you saw the mask trudging towards you. You were frozen in place as the Force captured your body; holding you like a statue as Kylo closed the gap and stood before the two of you. “I thought I sent you out on business, only to hear you neglecting your duties in favour of this,” he turned to face Thomas, also frozen in place but not from the Force, from pure fear, “peasant boy again.” You tried to move, to reach to Kylo in a bid to calm him down but couldn’t. 

“Kylo please, let’s just got back. You know nothing was happening we were just catching up. He was here to support your new venture. Nothing else.” Your body became free of its constraints and you immediately placed your hands on his arm, trying to soothe him and restrain him from lashing out. His gaze still fixated on Thomas, who had bowed his head to avoid looking into the void of the mask. “Please, take me home… please.” It was evident how much fear had washed over you, your heart nearly pulsing out of your chest as merchants began to circle the scene. Kylo’s presence always attracted crowds, meaning that it was important to try to help him regain composure quickly. You heard a sigh escape the mask as his posture relaxed, putting his arm around your waist and briefly surveying the area. 

“Know your place next time boy; don’t feel so inclined to address a superior without permission.” Thomas nodded, apologising for any issues he’d caused, and sending you one last remorseful glance before walking away. Considering what could’ve happened, you were proud of Kylo for keeping so calm. You smiled slightly and turned to him, running your hand up to his shoulder.

“Thank you my darling. I’m so proud of you. You handled that so well and I appreciate it so much. That’s what makes you such a powerful leader, you command such respect.” You knew he’d still be mad, so tried saying anything to make his mind loose focus on his anger. Your walk back to the tower was silent, his arm firmly grasping you close to him as you entered his chambers. Losing the grip on your waist, Kylo walked towards the window and stood with his arms crossed behind him. You sat on the bed facing him, waiting for something to happen. 

“I know you wouldn’t betray me my dear,” his gaze stayed on the city below you, admiring his years of hard work. “I just can’t have you seen with another man… Especially him.” Kylo’s fists tightened as he referenced Thomas; you knew how he felt about him and knew there was an insecurity surrounding the time you’d spent with him. 

“I’m sorry Kylo, truly I am. I didn’t think about it, I was just,” you sighed, trying to find a good way to word your next sentence, “I was excited to see a familiar face that’s all. It was nice talking to someone from outside the tower.” You bit your lip as he turned and walked towards you.

“Excited? To see him?” he crouched in front of you, mask meeting your eyeline. Your head bowed, knowing you had said something wrong. 

“I just meant… I mean I like talking to people that’s all. Speaking to someone different was refreshing.” You looked up at the cold metal that sat inches from your face. 

“Refreshing? Hm, so I’m not enough, is that it?” His fists lay on the bed either side of your legs, voice becoming low as anger began to build once more. 

“No! Oh, gods no! My love of course not,” you reached to take off his mask, desperate to hold his face in your hands and wipe away any doubt he had.

As the mask came off you leant forward as quickly as his lips became visible to kiss him softly, mask dropping to the floor with a loud crash. You wanted to reassure him, to make him feel better. His hands relaxed and settled on your thighs, lips melting into the kiss. Your hands cupped his cheeks as your lips glided against his, feeling the anger dissipate from within him. You hummed against his lips and stroked his softening features. He pulled away slowly, the words falling from lips next caused your eyes to shoot open. 

“No more little adventures on your own my sweet one, from now on.” He stood and walked away, not giving you time to protest. As he reappeared, armour shed, you tried to protest his last notion, but he raised his hand to silence you before you could get a word out. “Now, now. I know you don’t like it, but it’s for your own good. Mine as well. We can’t have our people thinking we are divided, now can we?” Your bottom lip caught between your teeth, considering what he was saying. Kylo sat next to you on the bed, taking your hands in his own. “You know I do it because I want you safe. I don’t want to upset you. My princess can have the world at her feet, but we must consider our position within the new world order.” It made sense; he wasn’t being vindictive or cruel. He did have your best interests at heart. “You can still see the town my dear, whenever you like” you looked up, hope gleaming in your eyes. The thought of not being able to spend time with your people dulled your heart. “You just have to be accompanied my love. By me.” You nodded; spending more time with Kylo wasn’t a punishment, and if it kept his mind peaceful you would obey.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In honour of Adam's birthday, here's an extra chapter for you all! Happy birthday you rudely large man x 
> 
> Trigger warning: suicide, depression
> 
> This is a short but heavy one so please proceed with caution and only carry on if you're in the right frame of mind

You couldn't take anymore. 

Weeks of being trapped within the marble constraints of the tower had started to drive you insane. You knew he wanted you to be safe, but you were losing your mind.

You felt like you were suffocating, and he wasn't even around to calm you. When Kylo said he’d have to accompany you into town, you felt secure in the idea that you could still go and experience life outside the walls of his chambers. But since that day, you had only ventured out together a handful of times.

Tensions had grown on one of the neighbouring planets, a new wave of resistance had appeared, and the Order was adamant on tackling it quickly; killing off the virus before it spread. This meant that much of your collective time was taken up strategizing or planning assaults on enemy bases. Most days you would wake to an empty bed as Kylo would be called into emergency talks. Loneliness was beginning to overcome you; the four black walls of your suite beginning to feel like a cage.

It'd been a week since the Order deployed troops, overseen by Kylo and you'd heard nothing from him. No word of his safety or progress against the resistance. It was the first time you'd been apart and your heart was aching. The loneliness consumed you, fear engulfed your heart and you couldn't take anymore. 

Your kind heart had been replaced by an empty void. Your other half had disappeared and the demons inside your mind told you he was never coming back. 

No interaction, no routine, no change. Your days had merged into an empty void. All you had was your thoughts, and that felt like torture. Things became so dark inside of you; there was no warmth and hope had all but diminished.

The guards at the door never came in; they were simply in place to stop you leaving. You couldn’t even look to them for the social interaction you craved so badly.

There’d always been a darkness inside of you. It started from a young age, when your parents initially became involved with the First Order. They would spend days away at a time, travelling to conferences and rallies, volunteering in any way they could while you stayed home alone. Fear and anxiety would consume your mind in the time you spent alone; you knew they loved you and they were only doing what they thought would help secure a better future for you. Whenever they returned, you were greeted with as much love and affection as possible. They were never gone for more than a few days, but each time your mind would run into dark places that scared you.

You hadn’t felt this darkness in years. Being with Kylo, and then Thomas, meant that you hadn’t truly felt alone in a long time. But in the past few weeks, with only the suns in the sky as company, you mind wandered back to the darkness and you couldn’t find the strength to fight it anymore.

You knew you wouldn't be disturbed. It was all too much, and you couldn't take anymore.

Tears spilling from your eyes, you placed a handwritten note on his pillow and made your way into the bathroom.


	12. Chapter 12

News travelled fast; within the hour of the discovery, a messenger was sent to Kylo's post, the letter you’d left on his pillow in hand. 

A minor injury to his arm had taken him out of battle, so the messenger found him sulking in his chambers as the battles fought on outside. Rage filled his entire body, animalistic groans could be heard throughout the compound as his saber met every surface and piece of furniture in the room, the note taunting him as it fell from his hand onto the bed.

'Suffocated in life, and so suffocated in death. My love I’m sorry, I truly am. I’m sorry I couldn’t be strong for you anymore. It is all just too much. The longing to be by your side, the yearning to be free to walk the streets. I can't be caged any longer. It isn't fair, it hurts too much. I can't take anymore.

From a time long ago, I have always feared the darkness that dwelled inside of me. Without you by my side, giving me strength, I couldn’t keep it away any longer.

You know me, my dear. You know my need to be free. To roam the fields and wander the streets. May we see each other again in the fields of red in my dreams. I love you.'

Footsteps boomed as he raced towards his ship, co-ordinates pre-set by crew members who'd had it ready the second the messenger arrived. Kylo could barely see, his mind so clouded with anger and fear that he barely made the flight back in one piece.

They'd found you cold, limp and hanging from the ceiling. As you stepped off the sink, a bottle had fallen and shattered, alerting the stormtroopers outside that something had happened. They barely got you in time; consciousness all but faded and lips slowly turning blue. You couldn't remember much, no recollection of how you made it to the medical centre, but you awoke in a medbay bed. 

Your mind replayed the scene from so many years ago when you last awoke in a bed like this and you began to sob. An end, that's all you wanted. An end to your pain, to your fear and to your suffocation. But you never got what you want, and now you had to face the consequences of your actions. Wails and cries passed your lips as your eyes burned with tears and your throat throbbed with pain. 

That's when you heard it, shouting. Demands, questions, orders. You could hear him searching for you, voice so loud but so cold.

You heard medical staff begging him to calm down, trying to delay him as he stormed through the door into your room. No mask, no emotion. His cold, haunting eyes pierced yours as he stood in the doorway; unable to move as he took in your appearance. 

Pale, weak, crying... 

You looked as though nothing could fix you, and that broke him inside. Cries slowing, tears disappearing, you watched as he slowly stepped closer. He wasn't looking at you; he was looking through you, through your thoughts and memories. His eyes darted around your face for any sign that you would be ok but halted when they landed on the red marks swelling at your neck. The marks so similar to the one he'd left before, when his anger got too much. It was as though he had done this to you.

Seeing the look in his eyes made what you did feel real. Feel wrong. Your hand reached for him; throat too sore to speak. Moving closer, eyes not leaving your neck, he knelt beside you and took your hand. “Why...” he whispered, eyes finally meeting yours, “Why did this happen?” New tears began forming in your eyes as his words met your ears, the heartbreak in his voice mimicking the feeling you experienced the last time you sat in this room.

“I... I...” Your throat scratching each time you tried to reply, face contorting from the pain. Kylo rested a hand on your cheek and looked into your eyes. 

“Don't speak, just think... let me in”. Your mind began running a million miles as you felt his presence inside.

'I felt so alone, so scared. You had gone and I didn't know if you were ever coming back... There were rumours you weren’t coming back… I couldn't take anymore. I was so scared.' His thumb began stroking your cheek as he sat in silence, listening to everything you wanted to say. 'I felt like I was suffocating in there, like I was a prisoner in my own home. Nothing felt right, it all just hurt so much. Everything was dark, my heart had vanished with you as you took off that day. It... It felt like the only thing I could do....' Your head dropped; eyes clenching shut to stop waterfalls cascading down your cheeks. You couldn't look at him, too scared of what you would see. His hand didn't leave your face, still rubbing slowly as Kylo rested his forehead on your leg. He was broken, scared. He'd failed you and he knew this was all because of him. His hand finally fell from your cheek and joined his head on your lap. Hand resting weakly on his back, you tried to soothe him but couldn’t find the strength to move. His breath was broken, tears forming in his eyes as his head raised once more to investigate yours. You tried to smile, but your face was too numb to move.

“This was me; this was my doing…” he stood, pacing up and down the room. Eyes locked on him; you couldn’t react from fear your body would break. “I was careless, I left you and didn’t even consider what would happen to you. My darling, you…” he stopped and turned to you, “you could’ve died. You wanted to die. Because of me.” Your head shook gently, your mind raising with reasons that he was wrong. You knew he was listening; he knew you wanted him to feel better. A silence fell as you both of you absorbed the other; feelings and fears passing between each of you. He was back now; he was there to look after you. That’s all you wanted.

Kylo had you moved back up into your shared chambers; he wanted to be by your side as much as he physically could be while you recovered and being in the medical centre made that difficult. You were visited twice a day by doctors overseeing your recovery. Kylo sat by your side during every appointment, never letting go of your hand. Your maid dressed and cleaned you, making sure you were comfortable and always checking that you were feeling ok. Whenever Kylo wasn’t around, she was there to make sure you never felt alone. She was a kind woman, probably nearly twice your age but with a young soul that always made you feel calm in her presence. Her hands were skilled and gentle, always touching you softly and checking you were comfortable. She was the closest thing to a friend you had outside of your work life and Kylo. She was special to you, even though you didn’t spend much time together.

Each day you grew stronger; having Kylo with you helped you heal more than any medicine could. Your only time alone was during emergency talks where he had to leave you for a brief time, but as the resistance was slowly defeated, there was less need for Kylo to directly oversee events.

It took about a week for your voice to fully return, swelling disappearing and strength returning. The first time Kylo’s name left your lips was like a symphony for him, smile stretching across his face as he ran to your side and softly kissed you. It was a sign you were recovering and that filled his heart with hope. 

Another week passed and you were walking again, body almost fully recovered. 

Even though you were stronger, Kylo refused to take you out into the city; too afraid your body would give in because of over stimulation. No matter how much you begged to see the people again, he would simply hold you in a tight embrace and shake his head. It had become frustrating; you weren’t a china doll and wanted to get back to normality. The more he babied you, the less you could move on from what happened.


	13. Chapter 13

One day you’d had enough; walking out of the bathroom you saw Kylo reading on the bed. “I want to go out.” Your voice was firm, arms crossing against your chest. He simply looked up at you and tilted his head, almost amused by your sudden burst of confidence. “I’m sick of sitting around while life passes me by. I’m not a child, Kylo, I can make my own decisions and it’s time for me to move on and experience things again.” His book closed and he shifted so he was perched on the side of the bed watching you, a smile crawling across his face. Your head tilted to the side, foot tapping as you became annoyed. “Glad to see you’re so amused by all of this, because I’m not,” you walked over to the wardrobe and picked out some clothes, “I’m going into town whether you come with me or not.”

With your back turned to him, you began to dress yourself. A hand connected to your hip which startled you, body spinning and face tilting upwards. Without a second to register what was happening, Kylo’s lips attached to yours. His hands snaked around your waist and held you tight to his large frame. Your body melted into his touch as he guided you towards the bed. 

As your knees grazed the edge, back colliding with the mattress, you dug your nails into his shoulders. His thumbs rubbed circles into your hips as you squirmed underneath him. “So, my princess feels better does she?” his lips tickled yours as he spoke, playfully biting your bottom lip between sentences. “Ok, we’ll go out,” you smiled and kissed him once again, hands wrapping into his hair and letting your tongue push past his lips. He moaned into your mouth before pulling away, “but,” your brow furrowed, unsure what he was going to say next. “When we get back, your body is mine to play with.” A dark smirk adorned his features, hands digging into your hips. Your cheeks flushed red, mind racing with memories of times the man above you had ravaged your body in ways no one else could. “Is that a deal, my pet?” He kissed you once more before moving back, waiting for you to answer. 

You simply nodded and bit your lip, smiling as he licked his lips. “Oh pet, biting that lip of yours will only make me want to keep you in here. So, I can have you all to myself, however I want…” One hand slipped under your shirt and caressed your breast, a low hum leaving you as his fingers connected with your nipple. Before you became intoxicated with his touch, you pushed him off and laughed. 

“You won’t win that easily mister.” You chuckled, causing a smile from Kylo as you both stood and changed into your formal wear.

Fresh air: it felt like heaven against your skin as you walked beside your masked love. As you strode down the streets, cheers and waves came from all angles. You didn’t know where to look as townspeople lined to catch a glimpse of you both. 

Questions of your disappearance began; no one had seen you in a month and many had assumed you had left again. But seeing you, hand in hand with their emperor, gave them faith and joy once more. You were loved by the city folk. Everything you did for them, the time you spent helping and entertaining them sat in their hearts. You were just as crucial to their lives as the man behind the mask. 

Kylo squeezed your hand lightly, making sure you were fine as you walked through the market. You smiled and rested your head on his arm as you walked. It felt better than you could imagine to be outside again, and to have Kylo with you made it perfect. Stopping to speak to an older woman running her own food stand, your eyes caught sight of the same familiar face you saw the last time you ventured out. Thomas smiled and waved from a distance, too afraid to approach. You smiled and looked up to Kylo who had also noticed him. 

“Can we just say hello, together?” The mask turned to you and slowly nodding, your smile gleaming as you squeezed his arm and began walking over. Thomas bowed as you closed the distance, smiling to both of you. 

“It’s good to see you out and about again, madam” you giggled, hearing that from him felt so foreign but funny. “A lot of the merchants had worried something had happened to you,” he glanced up at Kylo and then back to you “we missed your presence in the marketplace. Your smile always cheers up the workers.” You felt Kylo’s grip on you tighten, picking up on the tone in Thomas’ words. “I would hate to imagine anything happening to you, or… anyone causing you harm.”

“I assure you, I’m fine,” you said, rubbing Kylo’s arm slowly as you pre-empted his anger. “We all need to take a break sometimes. But I’m back now and so happy to see everyone again.” Kylo’s head titled, looking towards Thomas, 

“the people should know that I would never allow any harm to fall on my love,” he looked down at you and then back to Thomas, stepping forward slightly. “There is nowhere in this universe that she would be safer than in my arms.” A small growl left his mask as he finished his sentence. Your teeth caught you bottom lip, holding his arm tightly and sliding a hand under his cape to rub his spine slowly. 

‘Don’t do this here, Kylo. Not now, for me.’ You silently willed him to relax with your mind. Thomas nodded, but the look on his face told you he wouldn’t leave it at that, much like the look you saw on his face that day in the alley; he wanted to push Kylo’s buttons, too long had he waited for the opportunity. 

“I understand that sir, but I can’t help but think back to a time where she felt safer in the arms of someone else.” He glanced down at you and then back Kylo. “There were rumours that tempers had become too much, again.”

You couldn’t let this continue. Stepping between both of them before Kylo could react, you raised you hand to silence Thomas. “I think that’s enough now. You should remember who it is you are addressing before trying to use such a tone.” Thomas looked to you as if you were a stranger; he never expected you to treat him as if he was just another subject. “I appreciate your concern, I truly do. But, like everyone else within the First Order, I am safe and thriving because of your leader.” Kylo’s hand rested on your lower back as he stepped forward to stand beside you once again. 

Thomas took a step backwards, looking into your eyes once more before bowing. “My apologies madam, I meant no disrespect. It was simply a case of my mind working before I could consider it.” He stood and turned to Kylo, “I do hope you forgive me Emperor Ren; I’d hate to think I was in your bad favour.” The look on his face concerned you; Thomas had never been an angry or hateful person but, in this moment, it was like he was someone else. Kylo nodded, before turning to the side. 

“It’s time to go my dear, there’s much to be done.” Your heart fluttered as the promise you’d made before venturing out replayed in your mind. You nodded and glanced towards Thomas once more. 

“It was lovely to see you again Thomas, I hope we meet again soon.” You smiled and allowed Kylo to guide you out of the marketplace and back towards the tower.

“Now, that’s my girl,” he purred as you walked back into the chambers. You turned to him as he removed his mask, a large smirk waiting for you. “The way you stood up for us, showing that peasant boy how you really felt, who you belong to. The way you commanded such respect…” he sighed and walked over to you, “gods, you made my cock throb.” He bit his lip and took your hands, leading you to the bedroom. “You made me so, so proud my pet. I think you’ve earned a reward.” 

Kylo lifted his hand, using the Force to guide you into the air, before throwing you onto the bed. You squealed and giggled as you bounced on the mattress, crawling up until your head landed on the pillows. A smile growing on Kylo’s face as he crawled over you, seeing the happiness in your expression made his heart swell. “Will you undress for me pretty boy?” He smiled down at you and connected your lips. 

As your kiss intensified, layers of clothing disappeared from both of your bodies. Your hands roamed his newly exposed naked torso, fingers darting across his scars as you bit down on his lip, stopping him from pulling away. A low growl left his body as you pulled on his lip, a smirk forming on your face. Once you let go, Kylo sat up and let his eyes wander up and down your body. It had been over a month since he’d last felt you, last had you in his control. There was an intense hunger growing from both of you, eager to feel and explore every part of each other’s bodies. Your hands rubbed up his thighs, body sitting up, so your chests were touching. His hand cupped your cheek, smiling and leaving a gentle kiss on your nose. “Lay down pet, it’s time for me to look after you.” 

His hands slid under your thighs, lifting your legs up onto his shoulders so your head fell backwards again. Your heart rate began to increase, realising what was about to happen. It had been so long since your felt his mouth against you, your eyes closing as the first lick contacted with your folds. A shaky breath left you as your hands became entangled in his hair, bringing his face closer to you. “My girl is so needy,” he smirked and flicked his tongue over your clit, “so ready for me, whenever I say.” Your hands pulled at his hair, urging him to continue.

“No teasing pretty boy, you said this was my reward. So, get working.” You smirked as he groaned and kissed your thighs. 

“The only reason I’m allowing that is because you were such a good girl while we were out.” He smiled and began his assault. Pleasure rushed through you in sudden bursts, Kylo’s hands digging into your thighs as his tongue entered you. His growls sending vibrations through you, loud moans falling from your lips as he showed you no mercy. His face nuzzled into your pussy, tongue lapping at your juices as you pulled on his hair.

“Kylo, oh gods, yes. Just like that” your chest rose as pulses of euphoria shot from where your bodies connected. Bruises formed under his hands as Kylo held you down, pinning you to bed while his lips wrapped around your clit. He sucked harshly and shook his head, lips locking around your pulsing nub. You could feel your climax growing as your lover devoured you. Hands roughly tugging on his hair, thighs squeezing shut around his head as you couldn’t control the sensations burning within you. Kylo removed his head from your mound, thumb coming down harshly on your clit as he looked up at you. 

“That’s it my love, lose yourself for me. I want to hear my name as you cum. Scream it so they can hear you in the market.” You knew why he said that, you knew his ego was growing after what happened earlier, and he wanted you to feed it more. You nodded and threw your head back against the pillows, orgasm approaching quicker than you could comprehend. Kylo’s tongue slipped inside of you once more, thumb still viciously drawing circles on your clit. As pleasure consumed your entire being, your body shot upright as your hands yanked at his hair. His name spilled from your lips over and over, in a scream of euphoria. 

Your moans echoed throughout your room, jaw dropping and eyes rolling so far back you felt your soul leave your body. Too overcome with pleasure, you failed to notice Kylo raising in front of you. Chin covered in your arousal, his hands grasped your shoulders and pinned you back onto the bed. Your eyes locked with his, finger darting over his chin and tapping his lip. Kylo smirked and took your digit into his mouth, tongue swirling as he cleaned your finger. As you fell from his mouth, his teeth caught the end of your digit and you giggled. Your hands reached up, arms locking behind his neck and pulling him into a kiss. A brush of his throbbing cock against your sensitive heat as your bodies rolled against each other made you groan.

“I think it’s time I have my fun now, don’t you pet?”

Kylo’s lips connected with your neck as his hand snaked down to your hips, roughly flipping your body over and guiding your lower half up until you rested on your knees. One hand reached between your bodies, gripping his member, and lining up with your entrance, while the other held your hip roughly. With a sharp bite to your shoulder, he thrusted into you. Your nails dug into the mattress, jaw hanging open as your bodies became one. One hand reached around to his waist, nails digging into his skin as your head rolled back; your body was too consumed with pleasure to try and focus on anything. 

Kylo began thrusting but kept his pace slow and deep. His lips travelled along your shoulders and over your collarbone and left purple bruises wherever he could. Hips jutting into yours with conviction; he wanted to fill you and create as much pleasure as possible. Your name fell from his lips as your nails dug harder into his skin, scratching your nails deep into his thigh, moans spilling from you as your head clouded with the feelings your lover was giving you. Hips speeding, Kylo became compelled to chase his high. Your moans fuelling him as his pace quickened and his thrusts became erratic. 

His hand tangled into your hair, pulling you backwards until your back collided with his chest. Your arms raised from the bed, the Force dropping them over Kylo’s shoulders allowing your fingers to tangle in his hair; the new angle allowing Kylo to hit deeper within you. “Oh god that’s it my pet, such a good little slut for me. For only me." He pushed your body back onto the mattress, one hand on your lower back as the other bruised your waist. "Look at you, all bent over… Gods what a view, the way you grip the sheets as your arse bounces when I fill you” he growled and kissed you with as much force as his hips crashing into you. One hand reaching for yours, Kylo gripped your small fingers in his own as you both reached for the headboard to support your bodies, kiss becoming interrupted by loud moans spilling from each of you. “You’re such a good girl for me, letting me have you however I please. Showing those commoners where your allegiance lies.” A tear fell from your eye, pleasure becoming too much as your eyes clamped shut.

“I really need to finish Kylo, please, can I cum?” His evil smirk could’ve sent you over the edge in that exact moment. 

“Look at you, begging me to make you cum, again. That’s right baby,” his hips got rougher, thrusts bordering on painful as you desperately tried to halt your climax, knowing if you came before he said so you’d be punished. “Gods, I can feel you clenching around me. You like it when I fill you like this don’t you slut? Nobody has ever filled you like me… no man could pleasure you the way I do pet.” He bit your lip and growled, using the Force to play with your clit once more. “It’s time you let go my darling, time you cum with me inside you. I want to feel that pussy, my little pussy, spilling as you scream for me.” And with that, you exploded. 

A scream escaped you as your chest shot forwards, unable to contain the pleasure you felt. Kylo groaned, loving seeing you unwind underneath him. His thrusts didn’t slow, riding you through your high as he became desperate for his. “Baby, baby yes!” You cried as your hand pulled your hair away from your eyes, the other squeezing the hand that interlocked with yours. That’s all he needed to push over the edge. Your name fell from his lips repeatedly, his body shaking above you as his climax washed over him. Kylo collapsed on top of you, panting heavily as you both came down from your elated states.

As you regained focus, you looked back at him and smiled. Before you could speak, Kylo looked at you and blurted, “Marry me…” Your entire being froze, unable to even consider what he just said.

“W…what did you say?” you sat up slightly as his softening dick fell from you and turned to face him. He simply smiled and took both of your hands in in his. 

“Marry me, my love.” He was serious, he really did just ask you to marry him. Tears filled your eyes as you looked up at the man sat in front you. You raised up onto your knees, wanting to be level with him as you answered. 

“You really mean it? You’re sure you want me? Me… I’m nothing.” Your mind couldn’t comprehend what was happening, unable to believe he really wanted you for the rest of your lives. 

“Not to me, pet. Maybe once, but no longer. You are everything to me.” A smile grew on his face, looking down briefly before catching you gaze once again. He kissed your hand, pulling you closer to him until your chests touch. “You really want me to ask you, again?” he chuckled, amused by your reactions, knowing what was going on inside you head. You couldn’t speak, so instead dived on him. Lips crashing into his, body colliding with his strong form until you were laying on top of him. Arms wrapped tightly around his neck and your lips glided against each other. He lifted you up so your body was hovering over him, lips breaking as he sat up and held you on his lap. “I don’t think I’ve got an answer yet, pet” his head tilted as he bit his lip.

“Of course, you idiot” you smiled and hugged him tightly, tears falling onto his shoulder as you took in what was happening. He was no longer your lover, your partner. He was your fiancé. ‘Of course, I will’. Never had your heart been filled with such happiness. 

His smile beamed brighter than any sun within the galaxy, finally being able to call you his own officially. “My love,” he held you tightly to his chest, hand stroking through your hair, “my wife…”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Really sorry I'm late updating, I've been going through a lot of personal struggles and my motivation for anything fun has disappeared. To make it up to y'all, I'll be uploading 2 chapters today! Hope you enjoy, love you guys!

The announcement of your engagement sparked parties and celebrations throughout the Order and its territories. There was a genuine respect and adoration for yourself and the emperor.

The streets lined with well-wishers every time you ventured out, people showering you in praise and wishing you the best for the future. Kylo finally felt relaxed enough to let you go out on your own; the engagement response made him feel secure enough in his people to trust them with his most prized possession once again. Each time you went into town, for business or simply leisure, your smile shone brighter and you heart filled with such pride.

The ring was everything you could've dreamed of; made from the finest silver, laced with gold streaks leading up to the beautiful red jewel at the centre. It represented him; it represented your love. At every opportunity, you were thrilled to show it off and to allow people to see how much you truly meant to your love. Women would swoon at the mere sight of such a gorgeous ring, some even turning to scowl their own husbands for not performing so well. Everyone was so happy for you. Well, nearly everyone.

As you sat by the fountain reading to the merchant's children; their parents busying themselves within the market, you noticed Thomas watching you from afar. You smiled and waved, beckoning him over as you finished your story for the younglings. “No babysitter today then?” His words felt cold, harsh. Nothing like you'd seen from him before. 

“Excuse me?” Your brow furrowed, smile quickly disappearing and a frown took its place. “I don't have a babysitter, and I don't think you should take that tone about the emperor.” Your arms crossed, cape flowing in the breeze, wrapping around your legs as you studied the expression on the man in front of you.

His eyes moved to your hands, examining the ring on your finger. “I heard the news. Shocked me, to be honest. Thought you had more sense than to lock yourself up.” His words frustrated you; everyone had been so kind and so congratulatory. You didn't expect your ex-lover to jump for joy, but you thought at least he'd be happy for you. “You really want to spend the rest of your life as a lap dog? Never really being in control of yourself, never knowing freedom again?” His arms mirrored yours, crossing against his chest as he watched for your reaction. Stepping towards him, your arms fell to your sides and fists clenched.

“I really think you should consider what you're saying here, Thomas...” his name left your tongue as though you were spitting poison. He simply laughed and took in your appearance. 

“Wow, he really is inside your head. You almost sound just like him; all you need is a mask.” He laughed once more and stepped towards you, running his hand down the fabric of your cape hanging from your shoulders. “I know you... I know this costume isn't you. I know this life isn't you.” He sighed, and whispered your name, coming dangerously close. You wanted to step back, but also didn't want to back down under the pressure he was exuding. “Run away with me.... let me take you away from all of this. We'll start again, and you can have the life you really deserve.” You were shocked, hands lying flat on his chest as you pushed him backwards.

“I can't believe you, how... are you actually crazy?” You shook your head and turned to the side, eyes looking into the water rippling from the fountain. “This is my home; these are my people. I love this life and the man that gives it to me. You know he'd kill you where you stand if he heard any of what you just said.” Your head shook once again, arms crossing as you turned back to Thomas. “I love Kylo, more than anyone will ever know or understand. Gods, more than I can understand!” Your voice raised slightly, causing a few concerned looks from passers-by. “He can hear me, you know. He can always hear me, and I can guarantee he's on his way here now because he would never allow this...” as you spoke, a hand met the bottom of your spine, causing you to flinch and your head to dart towards the culprit. The modulator masking the pure rage you could feel emitting from his body.

“I've been courteous to you boy, I've allowed your tongue to waggle like that of a common stray, but I think you've overstepped a little too much this time.” His grip around your waist tightened, pulling your small frame against his side. Your hand rested on his chest as you looked up at the cold metal face in front of you. “She would never leave me, not for you. Not by choice. Look at you,” a pair of storm troopers appeared behind Thomas and held his arms behind his back, restraining him as Kylo released his grip on you and walked towards Thomas. You couldn't move; too fearful of what he was going to do. “You are nothing, boy. Absolutely nothing. You think you compare to me? To what I do for her?” He laughed and turned to you, beckoning you over. Lip between your teeth, you slowly approached the scene unfolding in front of you. Your hand gently placed on top of the extended leather clad one that called you over, fingers interlocking as you looked towards Thomas. His expression was one of pure hatred, as though the kind and loving soul you once knew had gone. “Do you want to go with this man, my love?” Kylo's voice broke you out of your train of thought, eyes turning to the tall figure looming above you. You simply shook your head and looked down, free hand landing just above his elbow as you held his arm. “You can tell me pet. This is your chance,” his free hand lifted your head slowly, a deceiving softness in his voice sent chills downs your spine. Your head shook once more, but that wasn't enough. “I've asked you a question, my dear, and I expect you to respond properly.” The finger under your chin now becoming a hand tangling in your hair. Heartbeat accelerating, your eyes fixated on the mask in front of you. Fearful his rage would soon become uncontrollable, you stuttered over your words.

“Of course not, Emperor. You... You know that I would never... You know my place is w... with you.” The grip on your hair faded, now stroking fondly through the curls that cascaded over your shoulders. In unison, you both broke your gaze from each other as you turned to face the restrained man in front of you.

“You coward,” Thomas growled as his arms were held tighter, “look at her, she's terrified of you! She doesn’t love you; she fears you!” He tried to break free, but Kylo flicked his hand, bringing Thomas swiftly onto his knees. “Go on, kill me. I don't need to read minds to know you've thought about it since we first met in that alley. Go on, do it. Show her who you are. Show everyone! Can't even look me in the eye when you do it. What kind of man are you?” Before he could even react, you grabbed the saber from Kylo's waist and backed away. He turned to you and walked over; each step you took backwards was mirrored by him taking one forwards.

“My love don't do this, not here. Please,” You tried to reason with him, noticing a crowd now growing due to all the commotion. “You're better than that, you know you are. I know you are. Don't give him what he wants, please.” A tear fell from your eye as your legs met the fountain's edge, unable to retreat any more. Kylo towered over you, head tilting slowly as he studied you.

“You want him alive, do you? Want me to spare his life so you can keep him around? Maybe you should go with him.” Your heart sank, an all too familiar scene threatening to play out.

“No, please... Please don't say that. You know that's not what I mean. You know it.” A quiet sob fell from your lips as tears began flowing at an uncontrollable pace. You could hear a straggled groan come from Thomas as one of the stormtroopers kicked him in the back, making him drop on his stomach to the floor. It was all becoming too much too quickly for you, emotions overcoming you as you couldn't control the cries that left you. Your eyes darting around to the faces of those who watched on, fear in their eyes. Not for themselves, but for you. Kylo outstretched his hand, silently demanding you return his weapon. “Tell me you love me, please…” You couldn't move, hands too scared to return the item you'd stolen. “I need to hear you say it, now.” You begged, watching as his shoulders visibly tightened. His mask came down to your face, an inch away from your reddening cheeks.

“You want to do this here? In front of everyone pet. You want me to look weak in front of my people.” You shook your head and looked down. “Give me the saber, now...” there was a dangerous tone to his voice, one you hadn't heard since before the trip you shared on your home planet. Hands shaking violently, you placed the saber in his outstretched hand. “That's a good girl...” he turned to face the troopers once more. “Take him to the imperial cells. I think it's time I taught this man some manners.” Kylo's body shifted to face you once more, saber clipped back onto his waist. He took one of your hands in his, bringing it to his chest as his other rested softly on your cheek. “Relax now pet, it's all over. He’s gone, he won’t mess with your head again, alright? I'm here now, I'm here.” You fell against his chest, gripping him tightly as you began crying. He guided you to sit down on the edge of the fountain, his hands wrapped around you as your body melted into his touch. The crowd fell silent, watching as you broke down in your fiancé’s arms. He cooed gentle words of encouragement in your ear, voice so soft even through the modulator, hand running up and down your back until you began to settle. His priority was you; he didn’t care who saw his gentle nature. His princess needed that from him and that’s what he was going to give her. 

Your tear stained eyes looked up to meet the mask that watched your every move so carefully. “It's time to go now pet, there's some things I need to take care once we're back,” You knew what he meant, and it scared you to no end. “I want you to help me.” Spine becoming stone, your entire frame stiffened at the idea he'd just insinuated. Without a chance to reply, Kylo stood and began to lead you back to the tower.


	15. Chapter 15

It wasn't what you expected. 

You thought he'd be bruised, bloody... chained to the walls like an animal as troopers bludgeoned him. That’s how Kylo’s prisoners always looked; he would torture and break them until he got what he wanted. You’d seen it before, but tried to forget as you couldn’t allow yourself to think of Kylo as the monster he could be for too long. But no, as you entered the room he simply sat on the floor. Not a single mark on him. His eyes shifted from the floor to you, and he smiled. “Sent you in first they? Gods, he really is insane.” Thomas stood and walked towards you. A part of you wanted to retreat, but you knew you had to stand firm. Any sign of weakness was a victory for him, and you couldn't allow that.

“You're lucky you're still breathing, and that's down to me. If I hadn't acted, you would be in two parts as someone mopped up your remains from the street.” He laughed and stopped, now standing a few feet away. 

“My little hero, how could I ever repay you? Ha, so now what, you here to finish the job? They got you your own little glow stick to go with your outfit?” Your cheeks flushed red, frustration creeping up your spine as your hands rested on your hips.

“What are you hoping to achieve here Thomas, really? I thought you were better than this. Better than all of this. And here you are, as much of a villainous snake as the rest of them.” He took one step closer to you. 

“As much as him you mean...” his eyes scanned your body as he spoke, calculating his next move. “I'm surprised my attitude offends you, considering to cowardly company you seem to keep these days.” The door opened and slammed shut. You knew who had entered but didn't expect to turn and be met with the eyes of your lover. No mask, just him.

“Cowardly you say, hm. That's very rich coming from the man who tries to manipulate a poor woman into turning against her fiancé.” He stood next to you, the dim light of the room hardening his features as you turned and watched Thomas' expression change from spite to concern. “Not so talkative now are you boy? Funny, isn't it... Most people say the mask is what they fear. The cold metal hiding any real evidence of human nature. And yet, now I've removed it you seem more scared than ever, I see it in your mind. I feel your fear growing. But this what you wanted, wasn’t it boy? You wanted me to look you in the eye.”

Thomas took a step backwards, unable to form words as an intense pressure was applied to his throat. Kylo walked towards him, standing toe to toe as the air was squeezed from Thomas. You looked away, not wanting to watch. Kylo extended his free hand, asking you to come forward. You shook your head and turned away, facing the wall as Thomas' gasps and chokes became louder. “My love come here for me. Now.” A sigh passed your lips as you turned and slowly approached. Kylo smiled and held his hand out for you to take. As your hand connected with his, Thomas flew across the room. His weak body slamming against the wall and falling to the floor.

“Don't make me watch, please. This is not my world, not what I want. If you must do it, just let me leave.” Your voice was distressed, eye flickering towards the man on the floor as your name left his lips while he groaned in pain. A finger lightly connected with your chin and brought your face towards Kylo, a kiss placed on your lips. You closed your eyes and tried to focus on just the kiss, forgetting what was happening around you. You sighed against his lips, hand resting on the side of his neck as he pulled your hips towards him. A small whine left your lips as Kylo pulled away, smirk crossing his face as he turned back to the man on the floor.

Thomas had sat up, eyes burning into you as your lip caught between your teeth. “I'm not going to hurt him love, not while you're here. As long as you're a good girl and do as you're told.” Confusion washed over you, your gaze turning to Kylo as he took a seat in the singular chair situated at the centre of the room. “Will you be a good girl for me darling, and get on your knees?”

Realisation hit you; you knew why you were there now. Kylo wanted to show Thomas who you belonged to, who you obeyed. He wanted you to submit and pleasure him while Thomas watched powerlessly. That's what he meant when he said he wanted you to help. You weren't expected to physically help hurt the man you once cared for; he wanted you to break his heart entirely. As your mind spun, you were gently lifted off the floor and brought in between Kylo's legs, his body relaxed as he leant back with one arm leisurely over the back of the chair, like this was the most casual event he'd attended in weeks. As you dropped back onto the floor, your hands rested on his knees to steady yourself. “You're taking a little too long pet, are you going to serve your emperor?” His head tilted as he captured your hands in his own. “Or should I just slaughter the pig where he lays now, while you're here?” A smirk played against his skin as you furiously shook your head and lowered onto your knees between his legs.

A small groan came from the corner of the room. “D... Don’t do this... Don't make her... ugh, fuck,” he clenched his side, the force of the impact bruising his insides. “You can't force her to do this.” Thomas tried to catch your gaze, but you simply looked back up at Kylo. His long black hair falling over his eyes as he leant down, face almost touching yours. 

“No one is being forced here, are they my darling?” His hand stroked over your cheek, a smile growing on his face as you agreed and reached for the buckles on his trousers. Your name once again fell from Thomas, but you carried on your movements. You couldn't look at him, trying to forget he was even in the room as your hands snaked under the layers that dressed Kylo. A satisfied groan left his parted lips as your hands wrapped around him, tugging him from the tight restraints of his clothes. Cock springing out before your eyes, slowly becoming firm under your skilled touch. 

You wanted this to be over as quickly as possible, so tried to use every trick you'd picked up from your times exploring this man's body. A purr of your name made your eyes look up to the groaning man above you, head rocking back over the chair. One hand tangled in your hair, the other capturing your free hand that rested on his leg. Your own hand moving swiftly up and down his growing shaft, thumb playing with beads of precum that dripped from the tip. In a moment of madness, you looked over to Thomas who was pinned to the wall; the invisible restraints of the Force making sure his head was trained on your actions. Kylo growled as he noticed your attention shifting to the other man, hand in your hair redirecting your face. “I know you can do better than this my love. Show him what that filthy whore mouth does for me.” Your lips parted as Kylo guided your head down onto his now fully erect member. Tongue swirling around the tip, you let out a shaky breath before lowering your head as far as you could manage. 

“Stop this Ren! Stop it now” Thomas roared from the corner, desperately fighting against the confines of the Force. Kylo simply chucked and helped your head bob up and down. Your name slipping from his mouth over and over, dramatic moans adding to the bubbling rage within the man in the corner. Your hand pumped what you couldn't manage to fit it, trying to create as much pleasure as possible. Kylo stroked your hair before tugging roughly, causing you to groan around him. “I bet she never did this for you. Oh gods, fuck, just like that love. Nice and slow for me, ugh... oh fuck.”

Kylo was taunting Thomas; wanting to hurt him as much as possible without laying a single finger on him. “It's because I satisfy her,” he smirked and pulled your hair again, trying to pull as many moans from you as he could. “I pleasure her in ways you couldn't even dream of. Whenever I want, isn't that right pet?” You nodded quickly and began to pick up your pace, head twisting as you sucked on the throbbing piece in your mouth. A low moan erupted from Kylo, his eyes closing as his mind clouded with lust. “Gods, you should see her beg for my cock. The sweetest sound in all the galaxy. The needy little slut she is, always begging me to destroy her.” He pulled your head away from him, angling it up to look at him. Kylo sat forward, hand in your hair holding you in place. “Show him slut. Beg to suck my cock.” Your breath was shaky, your conscience conflicted. You wanted to, because it was true; you were needy, and you loved having him in your mouth. But you didn't want to be a part of this game. You didn't want to hurt Thomas more than he was already hurting. Kylo's face became hard, a growl leaving him as he listened to the thoughts running in your mind. “You heard me, you little whore. You're going to beg, or I will kill him now and take you however I please over his dying body.” Never had you seen this side of Kylo, not truly. He was a murderer, a killer. A monster. You knew it and had seen it multiple times. But you never knew he was torturous. Never knew he could be so cruel.

“P... please sir,” You sighed and looking into his eyes. “Let me suck your cock. Let me please you.” His head tilted slightly, watching you as your hands began pumping him again, starting at a frantic pace.

“You can do better than that, slut.” His hand raised and pointed in the direction of Thomas, a loud cry of pain coming from him as Kylo began to break the bones in his arms. Fear overcome you, urgency in your voice as you begged. Not just for you, but now for Thomas. 

“Please, please Kylo I'm so sorry. I need you in me, I want you to fill my mouth and give me your seed. I need to taste you, to have to. Now. Please. Let me server you Emperor Ren…” A smile formed as Kylo's focus came back to you. His hand brought your head back down, and your mouth immediately got back to work. Tears forming in your eyes as your head bobbed with such focus. It was as if your actions impacted the very balance of the universe.

“Much better pet, oh yes.... fuck you're such a good little slut. Yes, yes!” The grip tightened in your hair as Kylo's hips bucked up to meet your movements. He was intoxicated with lust, attention now fully on the feeling of pleasure you were giving him. You moaned around him, hand furiously working on anything you couldn't fit inside you.

Thomas groaned in the corner, pain slowly disappearing from his body. But his heart couldn't take what he was seeing. Your own hips began bucking as you felt an invisible hand rub furious circles over your clothed clit. Releasing from Kylo's throbbing cock, you moaned loudly and rested your forehead against his knee, hand still moving against him to keep his pleasure building. “Tell him how I make you cum darling. How you explode, without me even touching you...” Kylo smirked and growled, his high approaching. You nodded and moaned again, pressure against your soaked core becoming overwhelming.

“Kylo, oh, f... fuck I...” You could barely breathe, hand now moving at a vicious pace. You wanted him to cum, you wanted this all to be over. But now your own mind was clouding with insane pleasure that vibrated from your aching pussy. 

“My slut, yes... mine.” He growled and pulled your hair again, you crying out as humiliation fuelled the vibrations within you. You hated to admit it, but there was something about making someone watch that was adding to your pleasure. Kylo laughed, his hand running across your cheek as he heard your dirty thoughts. “That's my girl... You're just like me, you are me. You know you love this really.” Maybe he was right, maybe you were just like him. Maybe the years in his company had made you into him. You whimpered, your own high threatening to erupt as the Force against your clit worked you towards your release. “You gonna cum, slut?” Kylo's hand gripped your chin, thumb pressing against your tongue as your eyes locked with his. His hips began bucking up to meet the rhythm of your hand, beads to precum now spurting from his tip. He was just as close as you were, but he wanted you to cum first. He wanted to be superior, to be alpha. Your thumb swiped over his shaft, eliciting a loud moan of your name. “You better scream my name when you cum, sweet thing. Show him who you want. Show him who owns you.” Sweat trickled from your brow, head nodding furiously as your impending orgasm surfaced like a meteor contacting the surface of a planet.

You couldn't help it; you were so overcome with pleasure. Kylo's name leaving your mouth in a laboured scream, body contorting as pleasure washed over you. Your climax was so strong it nearly knocked you from your knees, eyes disappearing into the back of your head as moans rolled from your tongue like a chorus. “Let me cover that beautiful face with my cum, slut.” Kylo growled and held your head still by your hair as he furiously pumped himself.

Thomas tried to fight his capture, screaming furiously as hot streams of cum decorated your cheeks and lips. Kylo purred your name as he finished on your face. You both panting as the pleasure began to subside, left with the feeling of guilt that washed over you as you glanced towards the broken man in the corner.

“Clean yourself up pet,” Kylo tucked himself back in and stood from the chair, “wouldn't want to be so dirty in front of your guest now would you.” Your eyes dropped to the ground in front of you, unable to look at either of the men whose eyes were locked on you. Using your cape, you slowly wiped your face of the residue that had fallen there. Legs numb, you tried to stand but failed, falling back onto the floor. Kylo slowly draped his hands round you and helped you to your feet, keeping an arm locked around your waist until he felt you were steady.

Thomas couldn't look up; he couldn't look into your eyes anymore. He looked ruined, as though he had been tortured for weeks. His eyes red with tears, body shaking with rage. You couldn't bear to see him like this, hiding your face in Kylo's chest as tears fell from your eyes. 

“Quiet, my good girl. You're finished now, it's ok.” His hand rubbed soothing circles into your hip, slipping over your arse to squeeze your cheek as he smirked, but you’d had enough. You pushed him away and walked towards the door, but you couldn't open it. Force preventing the door from moving, you brought your fist down against the metal barrier in front of you.

“Open the door Kylo.” You didn't turn round, gaze trained on the door. “Open it now.” An amused chuckle left his lips as he walked over to you.

“Leaving just like that, my beautiful girl?” His hand reached for yours, but you moved before he could touch you. 

“Open the door. I want to go to my room.” You finally turned to meet his eyes, him physically taken aback by the anger that met his gaze. He'd never seen this darkness inside of you; it reminded him so much of himself. “I really don't want to have to ask again.” You growled; fists clenched as you refused to stand down. Lip caught in his teeth, Kylo examined you, almost amused by what he was seeing.

“That's it my love, that's it. You feel it. Don’t worry, I feel it too. I always knew it was in there.” He smiled and placed a kiss on your forehead as he opened the door. “I won't be long princess, there's one loose end I need to tie and then I'm all yours.” You looked behind him, taking in Thomas' appearance once more before turning and leaving.

“W... what have you done to her?” Thomas whispered, too tired to raise his voice anymore. Kylo laughed and walked back over to him, crouching in front of the weak form on the ground. 

“I… have just unlocked her full potential. I knew it was in her from the moment we met. I could sense the burning fire, much like the one I feel inside myself. And now, thanks to you, I've finally unlocked it. We will rule this universe together, feared and respected by all.” With that, Kylo began walking towards the door. 

Thomas, confused, called out “wait! You’re just going to leave me, are you? Can't finish the job?” Kylo laughed and stood in the doorway, not turning.

“I’d rather leave you alive for now. I want you to continue seeing the image of her, dripping in my cum.” He smirked and left the room.

You couldn’t explain the feeling swelling in your chest. It was like nothing you ever experienced before. As you walked through the threshold of your private quarters, rage erupted from you. A loud scream spewed from your throat as you threw a chair across the room, watching it collide with the wall and shatter. Looking down at your hands, you couldn’t believe what you had just done. 

But it felt good, so you did it again. A lamp hurtled across the room towards the door, its smashing accompanied by the sound of footsteps outside.

Kylo walked in, quickly examining the mess at his feet before turning to you. There you stood, enraged and panting. A low smirk crept across his face as he stalked over to you. You couldn’t hurt him; you both knew that, so there was no use in trying. Your fists tightened as his hand connected softly with your cheek. “Feel it my darling, let it flow through you… that’s it,” he reached for his saber, an amused smile on his face as it activated. “Take it, use it.” 

Hands meeting his around the weapon, you had never held his lightsaber while it was functioning. His hands engulfed yours, pressing his chest to your back as his hands helped steady yours. “Feel its power my love, feel it’s destruction.” With one quick swipe, Kylo guided you to slash the wall with the burning red sword. Slowly, his hands moved away leaving you to freely control the weapon. It felt heavy but right, the vibrating in your hands tuning into the rage vibrating in your chest. One swing, and you detached the door from its hinges. Another, and the bookstand was set ablaze. This power, so new but so natural to you. Rage began to overtake your mind, conscious sense depleting and eyes becoming dark with this new power as you turned to face Kylo who stood watching you in awe.

Body acting before your brain could even think, your arms swung the weapon towards him, aiming for his head. Knowing your actions even before you did, Kylo quickly dodged the attack and grabbed your hands, easily overpowering you. The weapon fell to the ground as he wrestled it from your hands, whispering a gentle shh as he held you tightly against his chest, arms wrapping around your small body and restraining you while you fought against him. “Easy pet, easy… that’s enough. You need to control it,” one of his hands pressed your head against his chest as he tried you calm you. “Don’t you always get so mad at me if I lose myself and hurt you? You didn’t seem too concerned as you swung that at my head.” He laughed, finding it all fascinating, longing to see the full extent of your power. Slowly your body settled, pupils returning to normal as you panted. “That’s better darling, there we go.” He finally released you from his tight grip and picked up the weapon, deactivating it and placing it back on his waist. “That’s my girl,” He smiled as you turned to him.

“I, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to-“ he took your hand and kissed it softly.

“My darling don’t worry. You’ll learn to control it I promise. I know you’d never hurt me, as you know I’d never hurt you. Sometimes the fire burns too bright and you lose yourself for a moment.” You sat on the bed, Kylo standing in front of you with your hands in his. “I always knew you could do it; from the moment I first walked into that advisory meeting. My soul lit up with your presence and I felt this deep power within you. It drew me to you, made me desire you. That’s why I couldn’t take my eyes off of you; the power within you connected our souls immediately. And now, you have reached your potential. I will help you my love, I will train you as my mentor trained me. We will be unstoppable, side by side forever.” He kissed your forehead and guided you into bed. “Rest now my pet, you must be tired after such a long day. I’ll join you in one moment.” He dropped your hands and left to remove his armour. 

As he exited, your eyes roamed the room, examining the destruction you had created. It was true, you were just like him. Your rage matched his and you were just as capable of inflicting damage. It excited you, it made you feel strong. But it also scared you, concerned how you would learn to control such fury.


	16. Chapter 16

Kylo had decided it best to postpone any wedding plans, prioritising your training instead.

The next week involved hours of one on one combat, your days spent in the training centre located below the tower. Kylo worked you as much as your body would allow; every day you grew stronger and learnt how to channel the fire within you. Training consisted of using wooden or metal poles as Kylo believed you weren’t ready for your own saber, opting to perfect your technique before handing you something so dangerous. 

During your training, Kylo had realised you possessed some Force sensitive attributes, meaning you were able to wield such a weapon. While you couldn’t directly control the Force, it did explain your ability to link with his mind so well and how you could read people’s emotions effortlessly. With training, you were able to focus your abilities and learn how to look inside people’s minds and read their deepest feelings. You had empathic abilities which only grew stronger as your body became accustomed to the darkness. Most days training was precise and insightful; you were becoming a better fighter as each hour passed. However, as any battle for dominance would, your bodies would ache for each other and at times the cravings of lust overpowered the urges to train.

“You will make an incredible warrior little one,” Kylo smiled at you, removing his shirt as your session came to an end. “I am so proud of you.” He pulled you close to him, bodies sticking together from the sweat that had formed during your previous exertions. The familiar devilish smile formed as you looked up at him, running your hand over his forehead and smiling. 

“Don’t even think about it big boy, I’m way too tired. Plus, I could kick your arse now, so I don’t think you want to try me.” You giggled and pushed him away, grabbing a towel to wipe your fatigued frame. 

He simply laughed and followed you, “is that so my darling?” picking up one of the training poles, spinning it around his body with effortless precision, “want to make a bet…”

You knew what he wanted, and you didn’t have the energy to play games. But, you enjoyed the challenge and wanted to show him what you’d learnt in the past week. “let me guess, you win we fuck I win we don’t?” you giggled and lifted your own lance. “You’re on, pretty boy. But, let’s make this fair…” You slowly removed your soaked shirt, left in only your training gear; a tight fitting bralette and shorts.

“How does that make it fair? You’re trying to cheat, you naughty little girl.” Kylo chuckled and shook his head. 

“Well, no. You take your top off, I take mine off. It’s fair.” You smiled and got into position, “remember, no powers. Fair fight, and don’t cry when you lose.” He laughed and readied himself.

The battle wasn’t playful; neither of you wished to leave with a mark to your ego. Kylo wasn’t easy on you either. He wanted you to fight, he wanted you to learn. On many occasions he had injured you in the name of learning and progress. But it didn’t stop you, and you had been studying the way he battled during each session you shared. His weaknesses had become apparent, and it was time to exploit them. Your biggest strength over your opponent; his ego was too big. After a few minutes of basic attacks and confrontations, you decided to strike. A swift hit to the back of his right leg had Kylo buckling onto his knees, a second hit to the top of his back had him pinned on the floor, your body trapping him with a knee on his waist. “Give up pretty boy, I’m just too good for you.” 

His hand tapped on the floor, signalling defeat, and you jumped up with an excited squeal. “I beat you! I actually beat you in combat.” You were relishing in your victory when Kylo ran up to you and scooped you up, spinning you around as you giggled. 

“That’s my beautiful little warrior. I didn’t stand a chance, now did I?” He smiled and kissed you, arms wrapping tightly under your bottom, holding you in the air as you cupped his cheeks. You pulled away and swiped your thumb over his bottom lip, biting your own as you looked into his eyes. 

“How about we go shower, together?” you suggested, head tilting as you watched him ponder your proposal.

“What happened to being tired, little one?” his hands moved to grip your arse tightly, making you bite your lip and smile. 

“Winning just makes me feel good, and besides, now we know I can top you…” you both laughed, reconnecting your lips and Kylo carried you upstairs.

Wiggling out of his arms, you ran into the chamber with Kylo walking in behind you. As the door closed, you felt yourself soar into the air, spinning to face Kylo as he walked towards you. “And where is it you think you’re going little lady?” he kissed your hand and brought you back down to the floor, “I want you in that shower, naked and ready for me in the next minute…” his eyes lingered on your chest before catching you glance, a hand coming down on your backside, making you jump. You nodded and walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind you. Peeling the clothes off your sweaty body and dropping them to the side, you entered the large shower and turned the water on. Waiting for your love to join you, you allowed the water to cover you; the warm water soothing your aching muscles.

Hands wrapped around your waist as Kylo’s chin rested on your shoulder, a soft kiss resting on your neck. “You really were exceptional today my dear, you’ve come so far in such a short time.” His hands rubbed up your front, cupping your breasts and massaging them slowly. You grinned and rested your head against his shoulder, smiling and turning to face him. 

“It comes from having such a good teacher I guess.” Your lips connected with his cheek, revelling in the pleasure his hands gave you. 

“You flatter me, my love, but I’ve trained countless troops and none of them have reached your level so quickly. Its inside of you baby, just like I will be soon.” With his last sentence, Kylo removed his hands and lifted you up, back against the wall with legs wrapped around his waist. “You know, you may have beaten me today sweet thing,” His tip began taunting your entrance, a low whimper escaping your lips. “But I will always have control here… isn’t that true?” With the end of his last sentence, he thrusted into you; “You will never best me here darling, because this is my domain.” His hips started bucking into you. You moaned and nodded. 

“Yes Kylo, it’s true” as your eyes connected, Kylo delievered a harsh slap to your arse. Another swiftly followed, hand colliding with the other cheek. Each slap causing a loud moan to fall from your lips. 

“Not so tough now are you pet? Look at you, moaning away as I show you who’s really the dominant one here.” Kylo’s hips quickly became frantic, a hand tangling into your hair and pulling you against his chest. Your legs held against your sides, stretching you and causing a groan to fall from your lips. With your body settling into this new angle, your arms reached up and wrapped around his neck, bringing his face to your shoulder. 

“You think you’re in control here, my pretty boy,” you smiled and groaned, pulling on his hair, “but who’s needs are you serving, hm? Who experiences the most pleasure,” your pupils dilated, the fire once again burning within you. “You think you’re in change here but really my love,” you slipped from his grip, his cock falling from within you as you looked up at his hardened features, “I own you.”

Without either of you registering what was going on, your hand connected with Kylo’s cheek, a loud smack echoing throughout the room. You bit your lip, watching for his reaction. Kylo’s eyes closed, licking his lips and growling. Faster than your body could comprehend, you were pinned to the wall, invisible ropes tying you in place as your face pressed against the cool tile. “Oh, my love,” as his eyes opened again, your core ached. His eyes were so animalistic, so hungry; it was as if you awoke a demon within him. “You really do like to push my buttons don’t you,” his hand reached down and cupped your pussy, “but now, you’ve forced me to show you just how much power I have over you. And that means,” he lips moved to beside your ear, finger swiping through your folds “you don’t get to cum until I say so…” you bit your lip and smirked, looking over your shoulder at him. “How about you drop the magic and we’ll see who has the power here b-“ he couldn’t take any more sass from you, lips enveloping yours as his nails dug into your hips. The kiss wasn’t soft, it was vicious; his teeth breaking the skin on your lip and allowing blood to drip down your chin. You moaned, and bucked your hips backwards to collide with his, trying to gain any friction as Kylo’s tongue lapped at the blood on your lip.

His tongue dragged down your neck, lips finally stopping at shoulder. His teeth caught the skin and pulled it into his mouth. His name kept falling from your lips as your body began to burn with desire. “Oh, look who’s behaving now…” he chuckled and continued to suck marks into your flesh, fingers on your hips, pinning you in place. “No use trying to fight it my love, this is one battle you won’t win.” His assault moved down your back, leaving hot and wet kisses along you as he knelt down. 

“Baby please do something; I need it so bad.” The cut on your lip getting worse as you bit down on it yourself, a drop of blood landing on Kylo’s face as you pushed your upper half off the wall to look down at him over your shoulder. His eyes looked up and met yours as his tongue poked out to lick the blood from his face. 

“So sweet, aren’t you my pet?” his tongue licked up your slit as your eyes fluttered closed. 

“Kylo I really want to cum now, just make me cum” his tongue dipped in and out of your entrance, squirming inside you as your toes curled. Humming as he moved, sending electric jolts of pleasure through your body. His hands viciously kneaded the skin of your arse as you bucked backwards against his tongue.

Just as you were about to climax Kylo sat back and watched you as you began to shake. A smirk plastered on his face as your eyes shot open and sent daggers towards him. Suddenly, your body dropped to meet him on the floor. Before he could speak, you dived on him, pinning his body to the shower floor. A growl left your mouth, stare fixated on the face below you.

“Princess, you’re so brave… thinking you can hold me like this when you were the one meant to be punished,” Kylo drank in your appearance on top of him, his hands rubbing up your thighs as you smiled. 

“Like I said, I’m the one with the real power here. You want to roll over and take me, but you just can’t. Too tempted to let me work on you. Aren’t you,” you bent down and placed your lips by his ear, “Emperor Ren…” You bit his earlobe and gripped his cock in your hand, lining yourself up. He growled and gripped your hips, adamant he was going to command what happened. As soon as he felt your entrance lower onto him, Kylo pounded into you without any sign of mercy.

Your teeth sunk into his shoulder as he held your hips in place; you couldn’t move, left at the benevolence of his relentless thrusting. You forced your body to sit up and rested your hands flat on his chest, his eyes watching you closely as you began to bounce against his thrusts, moaning loudly as your head dropped back. “Why do you want to fight me so much today darling? Why don’t you just let me, ugh fuck… let me take care of you?” Kylo’s grip on your legs tightened, pleasure washing over him from the combination of your efforts. 

“It’s time I…. time I show you I’m worth so much more than… oh gods, more than a doll on your arm.” Kylo stilled, sitting up and holding your hips in place. 

“You think that’s how I see you?” His hand brushed hair away from your eyes as you bit your lip. “Is that what you think you are to me? A piece on my arm, and nothing more…” You shook your head and rubbed his shoulders.

“I just meant that I want to do more for you, I don’t want you simply doing everything for me. Let me take charge sometimes, let me show you I can do as much for you as you do for me.” You lifted your hand to brush his face. “This ring means we’re equal, so lay back and let me give you all my love.” Your words soothed Kylo’s worries; he felt as though your honesty made you stronger together. His hand captured yours, fingers playing with the ring still sat there. Your hips began to rock against him, capturing his lips with your own as you bounced on his member; throbbing inside of you needing a release. His moans spilled into your mouth, mixing with your own and filling your heart with passion. Both becoming needy for release, your hands began roaming across each other’s skin. Lips disconnecting, your head dropped back as moans poured from your mouth. Shower trickling down, coating your skin in pearls of water, your skin glistened like stars in the sky. Kylo ran his hands up to your breasts, groping them as he groaned. Sensation became too much and you gave in; pleasure rippling through you as you climaxed. Your body fell limp against Kylo, who’s own climax was triggered by your body’s response to the euphoria burning inside. Holding each other in a tired embrace, the water above you stopped. You smiled and placed soft kisses on your lover’s cheeks. He slowly stood, keeping you in his arms and smiling up at you.

Climbing from his grip, you grabbed a towel and exited into the main room. Standing at the window, you watched as the evening bustle roared around the town below. The lights of the city burned into the dark skies above. Everything was right; you felt true peace inside.


	17. Chapter 17

It was time; training had made you a formidable weapon, ready to be deployed. 

No longer were you just the sweet little companion of the emperor. You were his greatest triumph; his proudest achievement. It hasn't changed who you are, as your kind heart still shone through. But Kylo had helped you unlock power within that you had never known existed.

You were awoken by a soft kiss to your head; Kylo smiled and took your hand, helping you sit up as he sat beside you. “Good morning my beauty, how was your sleep?” He kissed your hand as you smiled and rubbed your eyes.

“What's got you in such a good mood, it's rare you wake me for anything other than sex or when you're trying to not kill someone.” You giggled as he rolled his eyes and smiled at you.

“So funny, aren't you pet. How do you know I haven't woken you for those very reasons...” he smirked, eyes drifting down your body as his mind began to wander. You lifted his head with your finger and kissed him softly, pulling away after a second. He met your gaze, “the time has come my love.”

You tilted your head slightly, a confused expression spreading across your face as you watched Kylo. The hand that had remained hidden to you behind his back came forward and your eyes locked on the object he was holding. “Your training is complete pet. It's time for you to stand forever by my side, in life and in battle.” You straightened up and reached for the saber in his hand; it was smaller than his, perfectly shaped for you. Biting your lip as you studied it, fingers running along the grooves and buttons, your thoughts raced. Kylo watched you, smiling as you looked in awe at the weapon in your hands. “Crafted especially for you, my dear. Perfectly balanced, designed after my own. Using a crystal the Order has had hidden away for years. I always knew it would be used for a great warrior, someone who would fight for the new world with skill and honour. I’ll admit, I never foresaw it would be my beautiful girl, but that fills my heart with such pride.” Your eyes met his, an excited smile grew on your face as you leant over and kissed him.

“Thank you so much Kylo. This... this is incredible.” Suddenly, a thought popped into your head. “So, if training is over... does that mean we can finally begin to plan the wedding?” He smiled at you and nodded, hands reaching for your waist as he lifted you onto his lap. You placed the saber on the bed, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck as your forehead rested on his.

“Soon, we will be one. Truly, one. You are everything I knew you could be and more, pet. The stars shine for you, the worlds turn for you. The universe shall bow down to you,” he smiled, kissing your cheek and whispering your name softly. “My wife, my weapon... My beautiful girl.” Your cheeks flushed as each sentence filled you with warmth. You could've stayed in his embrace all day, but a loud knock to the door broke your peaceful moment. The pout that formed made Kylo smile as he lifted you off and walked towards the door. You followed closely behind, and reached out just before his hand met the handle. “Darling, you're not wearing any of your armour. Let me deal with it?” He turned to you and smiled, nodding as he stood out of view in the walk-in to the side. Your chest swelled with pride as he trusted you to deal with whatever waited behind the door.

As you opened it, you were greeted with a gun pointed to your stomach. Your body tensed as your eyes moved from the gun to the face of the assailant. Thomas stood before you, blood dripping down his face from a gash to the head, eyes dark and sunken. Before you could speak, the gun drifted up and rested under your chin. “Where is he?”

You gulped and met his burning gaze. Kylo stood to the side, very aware of what was happening; calculating the best course of action as he remained undetected.

“He's… not here Thomas, why do you think I opened the door?” Your form slowly relaxed, a plan developing in your mind.

‘Stay where you are Kylo… He’s scared, he’s weak. Let me draw him away from the door and into the larger room. I’ll be fine, just stay out of sight because it’s you he’s after. Once he’s in the other room, he will be exposed and we can take action.’ Your mind was racing, hoping Kylo was listening in from where he stood.

“How did you get up here, w… what are you doing?” He walked forward, your body reflecting his movements and stepping back. Kylo had listened to your thoughts and followed what you asked of him, remaining hidden while he watched Thomas enter the room.

“I think you know why I'm here,” Your name fell from his lips as a lump caught in your throat, “It's time for us to go.” No longer feeling threatened, as you saw Thomas' demeanour change and looked inside his heart to find warmth, you turned and walked into the bedroom. Quick to conceal your new weapon from his eyes, you sat on the bed in front of it, hand slipping behind you to grasp it.

“Thomas, I don't know what's going on, but I really need you to relax for me ok? It’s me, just me. Put the gun down and talk to me” You tried to act scared, wanting to play along and not give away the fact you weren't alone. His eyes fixed to your face, watching as you bit your lip and looked to the floor. “Please don't do this... this isn't you,” You looked up again, eyes quickly darting to the doorway and then back to the man threatening you, “Didn’t you say that to me before, that I was pretending. Don't do the same, don't lose the beautiful soul inside you.” 

Your pleas distracted him as Kylo quietly appeared in the doorway, saber in hand ready to strike if you needed him. Thomas moved towards you, features softening as he knelt in front of you. You could feel every emotion radiating from him; hate, jealousy, love, fear… Your mind tuning into the way his heart raced as you spoke, the internal conflict consuming him. He underestimated you; he saw you as no threat and so had no idea of what you were concealing behind your body.

“Come with me. While he's gone, run with me. Let's leave this madness behind and return to the way things were before.” A smile formed on your face, trying to convince him you were listening as your hand firmly gripped the weapon behind you. “Thomas, you have such a kind heart. Your soul could light up this universe if you stayed true to yourself...” as you finished the sentence, Kylo suspended Thomas in the air. The Force tightened around him as Thomas began to kick, desperate to be free. Gun falling from his hand, he growled as Kylo entered the room. “That's why you shouldn't have come.” You stood, eyes turning cold and dark, turning your saber on for the first time. Kylo was right, it was a smaller copy of his own; the three blades glistening in your hand. Red gleam illuminated your features, power surging through you as you held it out towards the intruder.

“You really thought you could come into my home, try to steal my most prized possession,” Kylo laughed as he walked around and stood beside you, “and leave so easily? Boy, you really are a bigger fool than I’d anticipated.” Thomas couldn't take his eyes away from you, silent as he took in your appearance. “You think she would be here, defenceless and waiting for you? Ha, you have no idea what this girl is capable of.” Kylo smiled at you, dropping Thomas to the ground. “He's all yours love. It's time you show me what you can do.” Kylo leisurely sat on the bed behind you, eyes surveying your every move.

You knew how this was going to end; you knew from the first day the three you of collided. But you never expected it to be at your hand. Before you could allow fear to consume you, the flame began to burn within. “You come into my home, threaten my life. Threaten the life of the man I love, and think I would ever consider leaving with you?” You stepped closer, saber trained on him just as Kylo had taught you. Thomas sighed and looked down, unwilling to see the woman you had become. “This ends now Thomas; this all ends now. You can't keep trying to bring back the past. My heart belongs to the future. My destiny is here,” You briefly looked to Kylo. In your moment of sentiment, Thomas lunged for the gun, firing a shot towards the man on the bed. Your saber came down on his arm, slicing it clean off before swinging once more. It pierced his chest, blade protruding through his back as the light scorched the life from his body.

Your saber retreated; Thomas' lifeless body falling to the floor. Eyes glued to the corpse; your chest panted heavily; adrenaline continuing to course through your veins for a brief moment. As the fire settled within, your body spun to face Kylo, dropping your weapon as you ran to his side. The beam had grazed his shoulder, leaving a small but harmless mark behind. You dropped to your knees in front of him, hands cupping his face. “I'm sorry, Kylo I'm so sorry. I was weak, I was distracted... fuck I'm sorry.” Tears spilled down your cheeks, feeling as though you failed. Kylo sighed, hand lifting your chin and bringing your face to his. He captured your lips with his own, kissing you softly as the hand on your chin moved to stroke your hair. Your hands left his face, travelling down his chest and resting on his legs. Kiss soothing you; the tears stopped flowing and you calmed slowly.

“My darling, I'm fine. I promise you. You've left worse marks on me during training than this,” he smiled and pulled away, wiping the tear from your cheek. “You did it, you put an end to that irritating little peasant that wanted to steal you away. You really have completed any training I could give. My darling don’t be sad” Your head turned to look at the body on the floor; rage had left you and now you filled with guilt. You just killed a man...

Kylo brought your focus back to him, wrapping you in a warm embrace as he lifted you onto his lap. “Don't look darling; you don't need to look. Just relax my pet, you did so well. It gets better I promise. I will help you”. Your head rested against his chest, unable to cry as your emotions left you. Your name cooed from the man holding you, his comforting grip on you giving you the chance to process what had happened. “Let me get this taken care of,” he placed you on the bed and stood, “I need to see how this was even possible. Would you care to accompany me my love?” You looked up and nodded, walking to your wardrobe to pick out suitable attire.

Kylo had disappeared, gone to suit up into his armour, appearing moments later in the familiar fear-inducing aesthetic you'd become so used to.

As you straightened your dress, he came behind you to help fasten your cape to its clasps on your shoulders. Hands wrapped around your waist as Kylo clipped a belt to you, bringing your saber over with an invisible grip and attaching it, much as his own fixes to his hip. “You've never looked more beautiful my love.” You smiled and rested your head on his shoulder. “Ready to take control my darling?” You nodded and straightened up, applying a small amount of makeup around your eyes as Kylo sent orders to someone to dispose of the body.

Fear; it filled the eyes of those who saw you both. Your black heeled boots clicking against the hard marble floors, cape flowing behind as you strode the halls. Your masked lover to your side, filling your heart with strength and power as you roamed the tower. It didn’t take long to work out how the intruder had made it to your quarters; after Kylo had spared him that day, Thomas had been left in one of the lower cells. For a week he was beaten and tormented by the guards, his memories causing more pain than any injury ever could.

He was scheduled to be transported to a more secure and permanent facility that morning, but a new recruit had misplaced his weapon and left Thomas unattended in the transportation port waiting for the ship to arrive. Armed and vengeful, he snuck through the tower; leaving minimal casualties as he made his way to your quarters.

Kylo was enraged by the neglect of those responsible, but before he had the chance to unleash his fury your saber met the sorrowful young worker with one harsh swing. No one could believe what they just saw; your actions taking everyone by surprise as you stood emotionless over your victim. Kylo’s mask snapped to face you, body frozen as he tried to calculate your next move. “You all may wish to tolerate insubordinate behaviour, but I refuse,” your saber returned to your waist, hands smoothing over your hair, “this serves as a lesson; do your job and protect the Emperor.” Body shifting, with Kylo trailing behind, you walked towards the entrance of the tower.

“Where do you think you’re going?” He called from behind you, hand reaching for your arm in order to halt your movements. “You think you can just walk away from me after that?” Your body faced him, eyes cold and unfazed as you looked up at his metal disguise. “I don’t even know what to say to you right now,” Your body tensed as you prepared yourself for a vicious scolding. Gaze fixed on the floor, guilt had flushed over your being; something came over you and it was as if you weren’t in control of your body. You didn’t want to hurt the boy, but the raw emotion and the thoughts of what could have happened took over your mind, clouding any real judgement.

“What you did, it was just,” he sighed and took your hands, “it was incredible.” Your eyes shot up to face him, unsure what to do or say in the moment. “Such power, such command. My dear, you almost show me up.” He laughed and pulled you against his body, hands resting on your lower back. 

“You’re not mad?” small hands resting on his chest, eyes following the circles you drew on the fabric of his robes. “I didn’t want to do it, it just happened.” A sigh left your lips as Kylo’s finger hooked under your chin, guiding you to look into his visor. “I’m sorry my love, I am.” His hand rubbed softly against your cheek as your eyes filled with sadness.

“My darling, it’s going to be ok. You’re learning, you’re growing. Things happen sometimes. Your power comes from emotion, that emotion controls what you do. I know you felt scared, you felt as though you wanted to protect us. You were scared that someone had made it to us and could’ve hurt us. Hurt me.” Your head rested against his hand, nodding. “I know you my love, because you are me.” His touch was so soft and calming, it soothed you.

“I want to go out, I need some air and the city makes me calm.” The mask nodded and rested against your forehead. 

“Would you like me to accompany you my darling?’ You smiled and nodded, hands gripping his.

“Stay with me, please.”

The walk helped you; it made you calm being amongst the liveliness of the city. You felt at peace seeing the world around you move. Feeling as though you were a small part of such an extensive mechanism, instead of the feeling of being the centrepiece, took the pressures of your role away for a short time. Kylo’s hand never left your waist holding you tight to his side, comforting you with his large frame. You led him to the fountain, your favourite place. Taking a seat at its edge, your gaze followed the currents of the water, watching drops connect with the large pool at the base. Your fingertips dipped into the cool water, letting it settle around your hand. Kylo stood by your side, watching your calm movements whilst being mindful of your surroundings. His mind full of doubts and questions regarding your new power. 

There was a feeling of fear within him, you sensed it; after your unsettling outburst, Kylo couldn’t help but query whether you truly were ready or whether this new rage could be controlled. His mind raced with thoughts of you becoming uncontrollable, putting yourself at risk because your rage could not be contained.

Noticing the change in his demeanour, you playfully splashed water at the living statue stood to your side. A giggle fell from your lips as he noticeably jumped; the noise of water tapping against his mask breaking the deep train of thought he found himself in. “Something on your mind Emperor?” you stood, walking towards him, and wiping the water from the mask. “You’re so quiet, which makes me worry. I can feel something isn’t right inside you.” The smile on your face calmed the storm of worry within Kylo; such innocence and hope in your eyes, as though no darkness could conquer the light within you. 

“Just lost in thought my love, that’s all. You know I’m not much of a talker, especially when feelings are involved.” He took your hand as you started your walk back.

“I wish I could read your mind you know,” you smiled and nuzzled against his arm, “that way I could hear exactly what spins around in that head of yours, just as you hear everything inside of me.” He laughed and patted your hip gently. 

“My darling, to you I’m an open book. Whatever you want to know, just ask. Once we get back, I’ll tell you anything.” You nodded and walked, watching the clouds pass overhead as the cool breeze blew them across the sky. As you entered the tower, staff and soldiers alike made sure to avoid your gaze; the incident had obviously been discussed throughout the building.


	18. Chapter 18

Two large arms wrapped around you as you entered the chambers, a peaceful sigh leaving the mask as you lent on him. “So, what did you want to know my love?” your hands reached around, unclipping his mask as Kylo bowed his head to let you remove it. 

“So, so many things love. You really are a mystery to me.” He spun you around so your faces met, a smile forming as your hand touched his cheek. 

“How about we get changed into something more comfortable, and I’ll tell you as much as I can.” You nodded and walked into the bedroom, unzipping your dress and letting it fall to the floor. Kylo watched from the doorway as you removed the last pieces of clothing before climbing into bed, his eyes locking on your chest as you turned around. 

“Pervert.” You giggled and climbed under the covers. He chuckled and undressed himself, climbing into bed next to you and allowing you settle into his side.

“So, why do you wear the mask?” you tilted your head to look up at him, smiling and rubbing circles on his chest. He sighed and looked at you. 

“Really start with the hard stuff, don’t you?" A breathy chuckle left his lips as he shook his head. "Well, I wasn’t always like this…” you watched as his expression changed. When you first joined the First Order, you had heard rumours whispered amongst staff about where Kylo Ren had come from, but never had you known what was the truth. 

As you became close, his past didn’t concern you; you were too consumed with the present and what the future could hold for you both. “My mask hides who I once was. My history serves no purpose to what I hope to achieve and so I forged a new identity. You’re the only person who sees the man beneath, truly. Sure, I allow some men to see my face. But that doesn’t mean they really see me.” You smiled, feeling blessed that he feels comfortable enough to share such a personal side of him. "I feel like respect comes from the mask, you know? It makes people scared, makes them fear the unknown. Maybe people catch a glimpse at events, or when I'm training sometimes but mostly, I am an anomaly, to all except you."

“It also reminds me of my grandfather… of what he did and who he was. He was the only family member I connected to, and I never even met him... The power he had, well, that the stories say he had. Its all I've ever wanted. He made me who I am, without even knowing me. What I'd give to know what he thinks of me... of what I've achieved in his name.” Your brow furrowed, but the look on his face told you not to question him any further. Deciding to change the subject, you rested your hand against his chest and looked up. 

“So, what was it that had you so zoned out by the fountain? It’s not like you to disappear into thought.” You sat up, slinging one leg over him to sit on his waist. His hands rested on your thighs as he looked up at you. 

“I was thinking about you, my beautiful bride to be. As I am every second of the day.” You mirrored his smile and placed a light kiss on his forehead. “I was thinking about your strength. How you’re growing and where this will take you. It reminds me of how I grew to know the dark side; the way it took over my being and gave me the strength I wield today.” Your head tilted, watching him as his smile was replaced with a look of concern. His hands landed on your hips, thumbs drawing shapes against your skin. “I just want you to be safe that’s all, I want to look after you and I want to know your powers are controllable.” You nod and lay down, chin resting on his chest and hands reaching for his hair. Your fingers curled the black locks as Kylo placed kisses on your cheeks. “What flows within you is very strong, very sinister. It is the same energy I see in myself. I just don’t want you to fall victim to it. We must work together, my love. Must keep you strong, but keep you. Because your light, your beauty… The way you see the world and everything in it. I can’t lose that, because it’s what keeps me going." 

"How did you do it? How did you learn to control it?" Kylo's brow furrowed as he thought, eyes closing for a moment as you watched him. 

"I'm not quite sure I have learnt, my darling. Sometimes, things can get overwhelming and you feel yourself slipping away. Having you, right by my side, grounds me and reminds me there's someone who needs me. That I can't let the darkness consume me because I have someone to love and to watch over." You smiled, stroking your thumb over his cheek as his eyes shone up at you. 

"I'll always be waiting for you Kylo... always be there to keep you with me. I don't know what I'd do if I lost you again. I don' think life would be worth living if its not holding you close and being able to love you." His hands on your hips pulled you closer, smile growing as you spoke. 

"You, my beautiful little one, are the greatest gift life could have ever given me. Never have I felt loved, or appreciated. Never have I needed to depend on someone else for happiness or pride. Until you came along. Now, I know no happiness unless you are there. I feel no joy or no pride unless you share it with me. The suns and the moons have no baring on me, because my being revolves around your existence." 

You blushed. Heart racing as each sentence touched your soul. You gently kissed him, smiling against his lips. One hand reached up and cupped your face, whilst the hand on your hip moved to your lower back. The kiss was tender and sweet; your name rolling from his tongue as you broke apart. “I will always look after you, my darling… always.”


	19. Chapter 19

Weddings plans were in full force; it was your excuse to avoid training and responsibilities. You spent hours every day designing the venue, the procession, everything. Kylo gave his input at times, whenever you asked, but ultimately this was your project.

Today was the day of your dress fitting. It was one week until the ceremony, and Kylo had commissioned the Order’s best seamstress to create a dress of your own design. You had been conversing with her for weeks, discussing every minor detail to make sure your dress was perfect. 

Accompanying you to the fitting was your personal maid; the lady who had looked after you since your first day as companion to the Emperor. While you didn’t get to spend much time with her outside of clothing fittings and errand runs, she was still a dear friend to you and the closest thing to a mother you have had in years. She was very well versed in your needs and over the years you had become close; it was nice to have someone with such a gentle nature watching over you. When you were injured, it was her that cared for you whenever Kylo had to be elsewhere. So, it was a special moment for you both when you stepped into the viewing room.

It was everything you could’ve dreamed of – the fabric hugged your figure in the perfect fit to flatter your curves. Beautiful lace flowed from your waist in a large skirt that ended in a lengthy train, with two large pieces branching up and sitting on your chest. The points of the lace outlined your face perfectly, standing up like a frame from your breasts up to the points above your head and you couldn’t believe it was really you in the mirror. Golden details littered the dress, shining under the light and giving the impression of glowing energy throughout the material. The veil was delicate and elegant; it attached to a small golden tiara that sat on your head. You truly felt like a princess.

Everything was ready. The plan was to have the ceremony privately; just the two of you, a few trusted friends and advisors as witnesses and the minister. After that, you both would take the procession through town so the people could see you in your dress and celebrate the day with you. The parade would be broadcast throughout the First Order so subjects from across the galaxies could feel part of the festivities. It was all going to be perfect, but one point had remained a disagreement between the two of you. 

“I will not marry a mask Kylo! I won’t. I should be able to look into the eyes of the man I am marrying when I say I do.” You crossed your arms, tired of having the same fight every time you tried to bring it up. Kylo stood at the opposite end of the room, watching you as you began to pace up and down along the window. “If you want to wear the damn thing on the parade that’s fine, I accept that. But I will not walk down the aisle to meet that metal face at the altar!” He shook his head and sat on the edge of the bed closest to you. 

“My dear we’ve talked about this. I cannot allow my face to be so unnecessarily known. It’s not who I am and you know that. Security threats are ridiculously high that day, I need to be able to protect you if something happened.” You turned to him, face cold. 

“Oh don't try and use that excuse again. It’s me Kylo, me. And a hand-picked selection of witnesses. People that you picked yourself. How can you not just be you for one day! You always share your face with me, always. You’re doing it now! How can you deny this one thing for me on our wedding day?” He simply shook his head, standing and walking over to you. You turned your back and faced the window, feeling his presence directly behind as your eyes locked on the sky. “Do you even want to get married? Do you even love me enough…” your eyes closed as anger was replaced with sadness. A longing for validation buzzed in your mind as you waited for a response, scared of what he was going to say. Hot breath hit the back of your neck as Kylo sighed, hands running down your arms and landing on your lower stomach. He pulled you backwards until your back connected with his chest. Teary eyes watched the city as you couldn’t bring yourself to turn around. A gentle kiss was left at your temple before Kylo spoke.

“You know what my feelings are, my dear. Of course I want to be married. I want us to be one,” his lips touched your cheek, tickling it with each word he spoke, “I want you all to myself for eternity and more. But you have to understand this is hard for me.” You turned in his arms to face him, eyes finally locking as you listened to what he wanted to say. “My mask is my identity. So few know of what’s underneath, and that’s what gives it power. If I allow too many people in, I become compromised and that puts you at risk.” You sighed and looked down, hands playing with the strings on your silk robe. 

“Then no witnesses,” you looked back up to meet his gaze, “no guests, no friends, no advisors. Just us, and whoever needs to conduct the ceremony…” Kylo pondered your compromise; he knew how much you wanted your friends present and felt the pain in your chest as you put forward the idea. But seeing his face, seeing his emotions and his smile on the day was the most important thing to you and he knew it.

“You want that my love?” he took your hand, kissing each knuckle softly while you thought about your answer. 

“No… no it’s not what I want. If I had what I wanted, we would have a normal ceremony like any other couple. Our families would be there and the venue would be filled with loved ones all watching what is meant to be the happiest moment of our lives.” You removed yourself from his grip and walked away, sighing before you continued, “I would have the man I love in front of me. He’d be smiling down as our eyes met while we say our vows. The crowd would cheer and clap as we share our first kiss as married people. I’d be able to touch his cheek and tell him how much I love him, seeing the glimmer of happiness and love in those beautiful eyes…” a tear dropped down your cheek as you sat on the bed, your back turned to him. “But I can’t have that… I can’t have what I want.”

You heard him sigh as he walked over, kneeling in front of you and trying to catch your gaze. “So, if I can’t have the wedding I’ve dreamed of, at least let me see the eyes I love so dearly while I say I do… please.” You couldn’t help it; the tears began falling as you broke down. Head dropping to face the floor, hands covering your eyes, the cries wouldn’t stop as you thought of everything you couldn’t have because of who you were saying yes to. No family, no friends, no reception afterwards. Nothing that you’d imagined as a young girl. Your cries, muffled in your hands, still echoed in the quiet room as Kylo watched on. Letting you rid yourself of the emotions, he waited until your cries had dimmed before he spoke.

“I know it’s not the wedding you dream about. I know that… but you should have known that when you said yes. I can’t just walk around with my real self on show. I can’t,” he reached up and removed your hands from your face, wiping away the tears and holding your small fingers in his own. “But…” your eyes met his as you waited for his next sentence. “During the ceremony, when it is us and only us, you can marry the man you want to. I won’t hide from you my love; I know I don’t need to. If that is all I can offer you to make the day even the slightest bit like the one in your dreams, I will do that.” He smiled as your tears stopped falling, running his thumb under your eyes to catch the last ones. A gentle kiss was left in their place as Kylo stood to join you on the bed.

“Tell me you love me…” you looked to him as he sat by your side. “I need to hear you tell me you love me.” His hands once again found yours, rubbing circles onto the backs of them as his eyes locked with your own. Yours were so broken, so tired, but still full of the hope that stopped him falling over the edge. Kylo moved forward and kissed you softly, lips gliding against each other as your hands rested on his shoulders. Parting for a brief second, your name left his lips as a purr, before he uttered the three words that meant so much to you. 

“I love you, little one.” You smiled and reconnected your lips. To any other couple, days before their wedding, the sentence would seem so trivial and natural. But Kylo battled with his emotions most of the time, not willing to show more than what was expected of him. You always knew he loved you; it was in the way he acts around you, the things he does and says. Never had you felt so much love, but you just needed to hear it sometimes. It wasn’t easy for him and it was rare he actually admitted it aloud, but that never stopped him feeling it within. It made the times he did say it even more special, because you knew how real it was.

You both decided to spend the rest of the day in each other’s arms under the blankets. There was nothing left to plan, and you had agreed to spend two days completely separate before the wedding, much to Kylo’s dislike. This meant to today was going to be your last time together before you would see each other at the wedding. 

As you enjoyed the peaceful moment, an idea formed in your mind. Quickly jumping from the bed, you heard Kylo groan as you walked over to the record player. “What happened to relishing in the warmth of each other for the day pet? I was enjoying the cuddles.” You giggled and looked at him; hearing the leader of the new world say cuddles just made you laugh. It reminded you that he was human, and that you influenced him enough for him to pick up things you say and use them himself. As the music began to play, Kylo sat up and watched you as you began to sway in time with the melody. His eyes followed the movements of your body carefully, memorising the way it dipped and waved. A smile grew on your face as he exited the bed and walked over, your hands reaching for his shoulders. 

“Dance with me, lover boy.” He chuckled and placed his hands on your hips, leading your movements as the two of you began to sway in unison.

“This is my favourite you,” you whispered, smiling as he spun you under his arm and brought you back to his chest. “You seem your happiest when we dance.” He smiled and nodded, dipping you slowly. 

“So, what’s your least favourite me then pet?” Your brow furrowed as you contemplated his question, head tilting as you thought. He watched your expression change, swaying you both in time with the music. 

“My least favourite is the side that doesn’t trust me. The side that wants to hide me away and not let me be useful.” He smiled and kissed your cheek, spinning you once again.

“You know I trust you darling, it’s the rest of the galaxy that I don’t trust with you. But that will change pet, that will change. Once we are bound as one, in marriage, the universe will know our power and I will be able to feel safer letting you out of my sight.” You smiled and shook your head, resting it on his chest. 

“For the scariest man in the galaxy, you really are a big softie.” He laughed, kissing the top of your head and swaying. Your bodies moved as one in time with the music as the suns in the sky began to set. This was the man you wanted to marry, the man you loved with all your heart. In this moment, no one else in the universe mattered because your entire life force was in your arms.

“Do you remember when we first danced?” Kylo looked down at you, letting your body dip with the melody and smiling. He nodded and watched as your eyes sparkled. “The imperial ball, celebrating the coming new year. Before that, you never danced. Whenever I asked, you would just shrug it off.” He smiled, spinning you in his arms and kissing your cheek. 

“You looked so beautiful that night kitten, that dress was perfect… I’m pretty sure I would’ve agreed to anything when you looked at me with those eyes, in that dress.” You smirked and bit your lip, 

“sure, it was definitely the dress and not the other man that said he’d dance with me instead.” You giggled as Kylo rolled his eyes, spinning once again to the music as you let your mind travel back to that night.

The ball was held on a neighbouring planet; the council there were all dedicated supporters of the First Order and of Kylo in particular. You’d never been to such an extravagant event before, your stomach full of butterflies as you hung from Kylo’s arm, walking through the large gold doors into a beautifully decorated ballroom. It was one of the exceptionally rare occasions Kylo ventured out without his mask. As it was a First Order event, only the elite and most trusted members of the Order attended, so he felt comfortable with leaving his metal disguise at home. Walls a deep red, with gold accents and features littered across. The band played beautifully, bodies swaying across the dance floor. The announcement of the Emperor’s arrival caused a wave of applause and cheers, everyone turning to face you both as Kylo guided you down the stairs. It was like something out of a holofilm; you felt so out of place amongst all the luxury.

Walking to the bar, Kylo handed you a drink and nodded absent-mindedly to the conversation of dignitaries and politicians who came over to show their support and admiration. He couldn’t care less about what they had to say; his eyes never left your small frame next to him, drinking in the way you looked. Never had he seen something so beautiful, someone so breath taking; and she was his. Your dress was a beautiful gold sequin gown that draped over your body and rested on the floor with a small train. Strapless and backless, you knew Kylo had chosen it because he loved seeing you tastefully exposed. With your hair up it a braided bun, your entire neck and back were on show and you knew Kylo was itching to run his hands and lips along your skin; the glint of lust in his eyes made you smirk. You looked expensive, sophisticated and you knew everyone in the room thought so to. Men stared longingly, women stared enviously. It made you feel powerful, especially when you looked to see the man stood beside you.

An hour or so into the party, you turned to face your partner as he smiled down at you. “Dance with me, Emperor Ren.” Kylo simply shook his head, sipping his drink and smiling at you. 

“You know I don’t dance pet; it’s not happening.” You pouted, eyes skimming the room before a smirk grew on your face. 

“Ok Ren, I understand. I’ll just find someone who wants to dance with me…” you bit your lip and began walking away, hips swaying dramatically as you glanced at him over your shoulder. If looks could kill, his stare would have you dead where you stood. Waltzing over to the other side of the room, a sharply dressed young man caught your eye. His skin was dark, tanned; eyes a bright blue and hair tied into a neat bun on top of his head. He smiled as your eyes met, walking towards you and bowing. 

“Good evening madam, may I say that there isn’t a woman in this room that comes close to the way you look this evening.” You blushed and nodded, smiling as he rose to stand up straight in front of you again. 

“Why thank you, that’s very kind.” His eyes shined as he took in your rosy appearance. 

“My name is Kanto, son of the High Councillor. I hope you are enjoying my humble home.” You bit your lip, looking round. His home… you began to nod slowly, eyes darting around the room. 

“I must say, your home is very impressive. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a display of wealth.” You noted the amused smirk on his face, it unsettled you a little. Kylo was smug, but this man reeked of arrogance.

“I don’t think I’ve got you name yet, madam.” He stepped closer to you, eyes scanning your body. His hand extended out to you, smirk tugging at his lips, “would you care to dance, miss…” before you could reply, a hand gripped your hip and pulled you backwards. The man in front of you bit his lip, head immediately dropping into a low bow. “Emperor Ren, it’s an absolute honour sir.” Kylo scoffed and pulled you close to his side. 

“I see you’ve met my better half, councilmen.” The man’s head shot up, eyes wide with the realisation of who you were, looking at you and nodding. “Now, if you don’t mind, I believe I promised my darling here a dance, enjoy your evening sir and thank your father for the wonderful event when you see him next.” With that, Kylo pulled you away and guided you onto the dancefloor. His hand gripped your waist, other holding yours out to the side as he began to sway with you. 

“What happened to not dancing, Emperor?” You smirked as you saw a snarl crawl across his lips, looking down at you and spinning you so you’re back was pressed to his chest. 

His lips pressed against your ear, as he growled “well, I couldn’t let that little boy think he had a chance with what belongs to me, could I pet?” his grip on your hip tightened, teeth nipping at your earlobe. “My little girl does love to make me mad, doesn’t she? Knows when she looks like this, I just can’t say no… knows no man would say no to her.” You smiled and turned in his arms, both hands resting on his shoulders as your bodies swayed in time with the music. For a man that says he doesn’t dance, he was very good at it. 

“Well, if you weren’t so grumpy all the time… I wouldn’t have to push your buttons.” You kissed his cheek, loving the way his eyes were consuming you. “And, all I wanted was to show everyone how well we fit together, swaying to the music my love.” He smirked, eyes darting around to see the looks of envy and respect on the faces of guests. He couldn’t resist showing you off, letting everyone know that the most beautiful treasure in the galaxy belonged to him. It’s what he thrived on; the fear and jealousy of those around him. 

“Maybe you’re right my love. Maybe I should listen to you more often.” You spent the rest of the night dancing, Kylo’s arms holding you close. You’d never been happier, enjoying the feeling of your bodies swaying together to the sound of beautiful music.

The memory always made you smile; it was one of the first times Kylo had been openly jealous and shown you that he wouldn’t give you up or let any other man near you. The ball was your first official event as a couple outside of work, so it was something you looked back fondly on all the time. It also was the first time you saw him let go and enjoy himself fully. Swaying with you, his smile shone brighter than any star ever could.


	20. Chapter 20

The day had finally arrived.

Your stomach fluttered with butterflies as the maids helped you dress. Your hair had been styled to fall over one shoulder in large waves, tiara perching on top as the veil hung across your face and shoulders. Everything was perfect and the buzz of the city below you made you even more excited.

Two days apart had felt like an eternity. You knew he'd been listening to your thoughts, making sure you were safe and happy. But sleeping alone in your large bed had felt so lonely. Knowing you'd be seeing him again soon helped steady your nerves.

The ceremony venue was beautiful. A dimly light room, lights littering the ceiling like stars. The aisle was lined with those same red flowers he knew you loved. The minister stood at the front, and your smile beamed as bright as the sun as you turned the corner to see the love of your life at the altar.

His hand covered his mouth as your eyes met, speechless at the sight of you walking towards him. You had always been the most beautiful view in the galaxy to him, but seeing you in your wedding dress took his breath away. As you stood to his side, you took in the appearance of your lover. Kylo's eyes shone so brightly, even in the dim light of the room. His smile made your heart soar and you'd never seen him in such formal clothing. 

The suit was completely black, saber still resting on his hip. His hair was slicked back, but a small strand still cascaded down his cheek. Hand reaching out, you brushed the strand behind his ear and smiled. No mask, no hiding. Kylo stood before you, ready to marry you as himself. His lips met the palm of your hand just as you pulled it away, and your fingers interlocked with his at your side. You didn't want to look away; fixated on the sight of him. “Hi” you whispered, giggling and looking down. You couldn't believe what was happening; you never thought you'd get here.

All you could focus on was the man in front you of as your turned to face each other, reciting the vows that the minister asked of you as your hands held on tightly. Your eyes didn’t leave his once; you spent the time memorising every detail, every mark on his face. He was so handsome, so natural; you couldn’t believe this man wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. As “I do” fell from your lips, a tear ran down your cheek. The minister barely managed to finish his final sentence before Kylo’s arms wrapped around your waist, bringing your bodies together as you shared your first kiss as a married couple. Your hands tangled in his hair as your lips glided against him, his arms crossed against your lower back keeping you tightly against him. This was no longer just your lover. No longer simply your Emperor. This man in your arms was your husband.

You could hear the streets full of crowds cheering from inside the tower as you both prepared for the parade. Standing on the procession craft, Kylo’s hand never left yours. You turned to him, wanting to capture the look in his eyes once more before it was hidden behind the mask. So lost in his smile, you hadn’t realised that the craft had begun to move into the daylight. As you finally became aware of the movement, you quickly turned to Kylo. “But, you… Your mask? What ab-“ his lips connected to yours, silencing you as a hand cupped your cheek and kept your face to his. Your hands rested on his arms, face pulling away slightly as the sunlight warmed your skin.

“No more hiding, my darling.” He smiled and turned to the crowds, waving at the people below. You couldn’t believe it; the crowds screamed with joy and cheered as they caught the first glimpse of you both. Kylo’s skin glistened in the sunlight, his eyes bright with pride and joy as people threw flowers up to you. Your eyes couldn’t leave his face, mesmerized by the way he looked in that moment. “Kitten, you have the rest of our lives to stare at me, wave to the people,” he laughed and wrapped his arm around your waist, “it’s time they see us.” Before he could turn away, you held his face in your hands and kissed him passionately. You were so proud of him, so in awe of the strength he had to finally show himself to the world. A soft moan left his lips, his smile growing as he listened to the thoughts roaming your mind. 

Pulling away, you finally turned towards the crowd and waved. Cheers intensified as you did; thousands of smiling faces watching as their leaders shared such a personal moment with them. “This is for you little one,” Kylo’s head rested on yours, his arms wrapping around your waist as your side rested against his chest. “They cheer for you, for the power you give me. They would never have seen me like this without you.” A tear fell from your eye, running down your cheek as your eyes met the beautifully dark ones looking down at you. His thumb wiped it away slowly, placing a kiss on your head as he turned back to the crowd. The parade was almost over, your arms loosely wrapping around Kylo’s waist as you smiled to the people. Today had been magical, but you couldn’t wait to finally be alone with your husband.

Strong arms holding your frame, Kylo carried you into your chambers as your arms hung loosely around his neck. It felt good to be alone at last, savouring the company of the man you love as the world outside moved on. Your feet connected with the floor as the door shut behind you, but all you could focus on were the eyes staring down at you. “I can’t believe it’s real…” you sighed as placed a gentle kiss on his lips, “my husband, my life.” Your foreheads connected as Kylo’s hands rubbed circles into your hips.

“You took my breath away today my love, I never knew it was possible for you to look better than I’d seen you before. But this dress, gods it’s incredible on you.” You smiled and bit your lip as his attached to your neck. A sigh escaped your mouth as Kylo’s teeth nipped at your skin, leaving purple marks from your ear to your collarbone. “I missed you pet, and I think your body has missed me too,” he smirked and led you to the bedroom, spinning you around so your back was facing him. “I almost don’t want to take this dress off, it’s just so perfect…” you smiled and looked over your shoulder at the man behind you. His eyes were hungry, but so hypnotised by the sight in front of him that his infatuation overpowered his lust. 

“You know,” you began to slowly walk away from him, hips swaying dramatically as you moved, “we haven’t had a first dance yet, my darling husband.” He smiled, watching your body move as you reached for the light switch. You brought the lighting to a dim red hue, watching as your husband made his way over to the record player.

“Does my darling want to dance with me?” his hand reached out for you, stepping closer as he admired you in the new light. The gold in your dress gleamed against the red light, outfit almost appearing to change as your hand rested on top of his. Both of you looked down at your hands, admiring the beautiful rings each of you wore that symbolised the bond you had made that day. Chests touching, your free hand rested on his shoulder and his free hand gripped your hip. As you began to sway in time with the melody, you looked up at your husband.

“What made you change your mind? What made you leave your mask here?” he smiled down at you, bodies becoming one as he dipped you in time with the music. 

“In our time apart, I had the chance to look back on my life and the choices I’ve made.” You spun around, back leaning against his strong chest as his lips met your cheek. “I realised that the mask should not be my identity, that I am so much more than my past. And that, my dear, is because I have you.” His lips met your neck again, smoothing over the marks he left minutes ago. “Because of you, I have no weakness anymore. Nothing can expose me because you are my greatest strength and the only weakness I could possibly have. The entire universe sees you, so what’s the point of hiding my face when you already shine so brightly? My mask will be my weapon, it won’t disappear. It will become a symbol of fear; when people see the mask they will know severity, know terror.” You spun to face him again, hand resting on his cheek, watching his expression change from serious back to calm. “But because of you, my people will know me better than before. Every time we walk the streets, my heart is already on my sleeve. You stand by my side, showing the people what means most to me. So, my face means nothing. It changes nothing. They will respect me, regardless of my appearance. My mask is gone because the world sees my soul every time you step outside”. His lips met yours as your hands cupped his cheeks. Arms wrapping around your waist in a tight embrace, it felt like Kylo was trying to absorb your body into his. 

Your hands stroked his cheeks as the kiss became more intense, more passionate. His arms lifted you, bringing you into the air without allowing your lips to part. He walked you over to the bed and laid you down gently, crawling in top of you. Dress restricting your body, you longed to wrap your legs around him as his body lay on top of yours. His hands reached beneath you, pulling the zip down and gently peeling it from your shoulders. Kylo’s jawed practically dropped, and a smirk formed on your face as you licked your lips watching as he revealed the lingerie that you’d hidden under your dress. The red lace framed your breasts, dripping down to the black and red harness connecting to your hip and thighs. Garter belt on your left thigh, white lace surrounding the red strap, you lifted your legs as Kylo removed your dress entirely.

“Your wedding gift, dear husband.” He couldn’t speak; too consumed with lust to register your words. His eyes devoured you beneath him, a low growl leaving his lips as your hand reached for his cheek. “Are you going to just stare at me, Kylo… Or are you going to unwrap your present.” He loved when you said his name, but the way it purred from you this time drove him wild. Without warning, Kylo’s lips came crashing down onto yours. 

Hands clawing at your waist, as yours frantically worked to remove his clothes, you both became consumed with lust. His hips began to desperately buck into yours, desperate for friction as you tugged on his dark curls. Breaking apart for a second, your breath ragged, you moaned as his lips moved to your chest. “How the fuck do you do this to me,” he growled and ripped the lingerie off your body, too consumed with desire to waste time removing it, “you ruin me my love, you turn me into an animal.” Your chest arched into his touch as rough hands gripped your breasts and squeezed. “You like that don’t you, kitten… you like when daddy gets rough, when I lose my mind because of your body. You want me like this.” Your head began nodding as his lips wrapped around your nipple, tongue gently lapping at the nub as you pulled his hair; legs instinctively coming up to wrap around his waist. The friction caused by his thrusts was becoming too much, your name falling from his lips in a laboured groan as your hips met his rhythm.

“Kylo, please just make love to me. Please me, fill me.” Your pleas were swiftly answered; the last pieces of clothing on each body removed. His lips found yours again, hands gripping each other as your husband finally entered you. Slow, passionate thrusts had your eyes rolling back. Your name fell from his lips over and over, each thrust punctuated with a moan that rang in your ears like a symphony. Lips connecting in a tender embrace, your hands wrapped round the strong shoulders above you, nails running along Kylo’s pale skin. The kiss was passionate as the embrace began more heated; no longer loving and slow. 

Your bodies began screaming for more, and Kylo began to increase his pace to match the burning desire inside. Tongues entangling within the kiss, your moans mixing together as each thrust sparked waves of pleasure. Gripping Kylo’s shoulders, you pulled his body to the bed beside you and straddled him, grinding your hips down on his length as his nails dug into your thighs. “That’s it baby, oh fuck yes that’s my girl” Kylo’s hands smoothed up your torso, landing on your chest. His fingers rolled your nipples as you began to bounce faster, desperately chasing you release. “Look at you, gods,” Kylo pinched your nubs harshly, causing you to whimper and speed up, “my beautiful wife, so desperate to cum. Bouncing like a little slut, yes just like that.” Kylo’s head dropped back, eyes closing as you clenched around him. Your hands resting flat on his chest, nails digging into his skin leaving little crescents across him. One harsh thrust up into you caused a loud moan to erupt from you, head dropping backwards as Kylo began to meet your movements. 

You felt teeth against your neck as Kylo sat up and attached his mouth to your skin, sucking harshly as his arms crossed behind your back. His arms held you tightly against his chest while your nails ran down over his shoulders. Moans so strong and so loud, your hand slithered into his hair and tugged his head back harshly; removing his mouth from your neck.

“I want you to look me in the eye,” your forehead rested against his as his eyes locked with yours “and I want to hear you say you love me.” Kylo smiled, hands controlling the movements of your hips as his tongue darted over his bottom lip. 

“My darling wife, you know I love you.” He made sure you rocked slowly onto him, creating a pace that caused so much pleasure your eyes rolled. 

“Say it again Kylo…” your lips touched as you spoke, teasing each other but not giving in to temptation. Before speaking, Kylo connected your lips in a passionate kiss as your hands cupped his jaw. Pulling apart, his chin moved to rest on your shoulder, lips next to your ear. 

He purred your name, catching your earlobe in his teeth before whispering “I love you pet, more than you’ll ever know.” Stars formed in front of your eyes as you climaxed, chest colliding with his as your body began to shake. Kylo held you tightly against him, watching in awe as euphoria consumed you. His eyes glued to your face, the sight of you experiencing such pleasure pushed him towards his own release. With one harsh thrust up into you, Kylo came; his grip tightening around your waist as his forehead rested on your shoulder. As he experienced his own pleasure, your hands rubbed soft circles on his back while your lips left soft kisses on his cheek. 

Kylo’s head raised from your shoulder to meet your gaze, a lazy smile growing on his face as fatigue began to set in. Climbing from his waist, your body relaxed as your husband took his place by you. Your eyes wandered the man next to you; a faint glow caught his cheeks from the previous exertion, making him shine. You couldn’t stop the smile forming on your face as his hand reached over and stroked your cheek. Your head relaxed into the touch, eyes closing as you rested against his hand.

“My wife…” Kylo chuckled slightly, leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss on your lips. Your eyes opened once more, watching as he settled into the bed. Arms outstretched, he pouted up at you as he waited for your body to meet his. You giggled and laid down, snuggling into his side as his long arms engulfed you. “All mine, forever.” You nodded, head resting on his chest and arm hanging over his waist.


	21. Chapter 21

The euphoria of the wedding lasted for a few days; neither of you wanted to leave the embrace of the other. You still couldn’t believe the commitment the two of you had made to one another, forever bonded. Allowing yourselves time to enjoy the feeling of marriage, neither of you returned to work until necessary. 

The wedding had been so monumental to the Order itself; peace had reigned in the time you took away. Returning to your duties was a welcomed event as it meant you could work with the man you loved once more on the future of your people. The relationship between you and Kylo made your work stronger and more impactful.

One day, you decided it was time to ask for more responsibility. You remembered the promise he had made you before the wedding; once you were married, he would trust you to do more.

Walking into the command centre, you found your husband in a meeting with a collection of senior officers. As you entered, all eyes turned to you as the men watched you confidently walk into the middle of the room. 

Kylo, sat on the throne in the centre, smiled and held his hand out for you to take. “My darling, what can I do for you?” You took his hand and grinned, standing beside him as your eyes scanned the room. 

“My emperor, I was hoping to speak with you about the possibility of me taking on more duties. I think there’s more that I can do around here.” He nodded, looking around the room and then back to you. 

“I think you’ve come at a perfect time pet, because these gentlemen here were just asking for leadership in a new venture and I was conflicted on whether I have the time to leave for such a mission.” Each man bowed as you turned towards them, nodding in agreement. You bit your lip, looking back down to your husband as he rubbed soothing shapes onto the back of your hand. “There’s been reports of a disturbance on one of the moon bases and I was considering venturing out there myself but…” he smiled and stood, free hand resting on your waist as he pulled you closer to him, “if my wife wants more work, then she can go in my place. Shouldn’t be much trouble, just a little re-arranging of the internal affairs. Even though the thought of you leaving doesn’t sit well with me, I think it’d be something you would excel at.” His lips left a soft kiss to your forehead after you nodded in agreement, before turning back to the men stood before you. “There is your answer men, you will escort the empress to the barracks in five days and follow any command she gives. You will treat her with the same respect and obedience you would me, even more so. Your lives depend on it. It’d be on your heads if anything were to happen.” Each man nodded before turning to leave the room. 

Your eyes met Kylo’s after they left, smile beaming up at him. “Are you sure you want to do this pet? I can accompany you if you need me…” your hand raised up, a single finger resting on his lips. 

“I’ll be fine Kylo, seriously. Let me show you what I can do. If I need you, you’ll hear from me. We both know you like to listen in whenever you get the chance.” Kylo smiled and kissed your finger, nodding as your hand moved away from his face. A soft sigh left his lips before he spoke, 

“I’m trusting you my love. The idea of you leaving scares me… but, I want you to be happy and to feel like you have purpose. It shouldn’t be hard; the worst part will be that we are apart.”

The next few days were spent preparing you for your journey; Kylo made sure you were fully prepped and ready for anything you could face. No one was anticipating any major difficulties, hence Kylo allowing you to go alone, but he wanted to be cautious all the same. Meetings took place in order to brief you on what you were expected to do during your time away; each talk filling you with confidence but you husband with concern. 

The day before you were due to leave, Kylo wouldn’t let go of your hand. Every final preparation was overseen by him; he would not allow any error to put you at risk. Arms wrapped tightly around your waist, Kylo clung to you as you packed your bags. “My love, I promise I will be fine. It’s just a routine operation. I should only be gone a week or so” you turned in his arms to face him, hands cupping his cheeks and bringing his lips to yours. “You don’t need to worry about me ok? You’ve trained me well enough to handle myself. I’m not helpless. I am your wife, remember? You know how much hell I give you; can you imagine what I’ll do to anyone that disobeys me?” He smiled and nodded, looking down at you as his hands rubbed over your hips while a small chuckle fell from his lips. 

“I just don’t like us being apart. That’s all… The thought of you out there, when I’m so far away, I don’t like it.” Your lips connected once more, hands tangling in his hair to keep him close. You didn’t want him to know that you were feeling nervous. If he sensed even an ounce of doubt within you, he’d stop you from going. This was your chance and you couldn’t let it pass you by. The kiss was slow and tender, both of you savouring the taste of the other in case you wouldn’t be able to taste it again for some time. You wanted him to feel safe while you were away; he couldn’t be distracted by worrying. As you pulled away, you held his face close to yours. 

“Focus on what’s here, ok? You can’t spend your days worrying about me; the people need you to be present. If I need you, I will find a way to get to you. I promise I won’t do anything stupid.” Once again, he simply nodded. This was going to be a test for both of you, but you knew everything would work out fine.


	22. Chapter 22

It had been a week since communication had been cut off from the capital, around ten days since you first ventured on your mission. 

The attacks had grown stronger and more frequent in the days since your arrival. Kylo had appointed you commander because he’d seen it as a harmless task that wouldn’t put you at risk. Nothing serious had ever been reported in the area; it was one of the first moons to fall under the occupation of the Order and so rebellion had never been an issue. It was your first chance to truly prove yourself as a leader and you were excited to accept the challenge. Leaving your husband had been hard, but having him finally trust you was worth the pain of being apart.

Upon arrival, you were advised that the matter was nothing more than trivial hooligans trying to make easy money from stealing supplies. However, the day after you touched down, one of the main cargo vessels was destroyed in an ambush attack. You were meant to be on board the vessel at the time, but had instead chosen to privately review security plans in your quarters, favouring a later inspection. Upon hearing of the attack, Kylo insisted he joined you; he felt as though the destruction of the vessel was an attempt on your life. You subdued him, putting it down to mere coincidence on the advice of the barrack's general and assured him there was no need to come. That was the last time you'd spoken to him. Communication towers were targeted next, leaving your compound isolated from the rest of the Order. With each passing day, the attacks became more aggressive and the failings of the crew and soldiers within the compound caused a growing rage within you.

Each strategy you'd put in place failed because of the ignorance and arrogance of the superior officers; their egos unwilling to follow orders directly from a woman, even knowing who you were did not change this. 

Their shortcomings forced you onto the battlefield yourself, getting a taste of real combat for the first time; something you knew Kylo would strongly oppose. Your saber slashed through countless adversaries as you and a hand-picked team personally defended the base after receiving warning of a large-scale attack from spies within the enemy ranks.

Before deploying, Kylo had made sure you were equipped with proper body armour. Your small frame guarded by the same lightweight protection the Emperor wears himself; all you were missing was the mask. You had refused one, opting instead for a beam visor across your face in order to appease your husband's countless attempts to keep you safe. The battle was long, but your troops followed every command once on the field. Their respect grew as they saw what a formidable weapon you had been made into. During your short time at the barrack, many had sworn allegiance to you, following your orders over those of the officers who had been in charge before your arrival. Which is why it did not surprise you to learn that one of the generals had found means to send reports of your antics on the battlefield to the capital. It was a blatant attempt to have you removed; they were threatened by the power you possessed and the command your skill demanded.

As you sat in your quarters with a glass of wine and your casual robe on, losing yourself in countless reports and strategy documents, the familiar sounds of the imperial ship woke you from your trance. Standing at the window, you watched as the ship docked and a procession of storm troopers made their way down the ramp. Your fists clenched, eyes narrowing as you watched Kylo make his way from the vehicle and immediately march into the building. He was masked, but his body language suggested a visible level of anger as his strides took him into the entrance of the barrack and out of your sight.

It didn't take long for your door to burst open. Your husband storming over to where you stood, hand immediately reaching up and gripping your chin tightly. The leather-bound limb forcing you to look up at the masked face before you, hold tightening as he spoke. “So, you didn't plan on telling me about your little expeditions onto the battlefield, did you pet?” He brought your face closer to his own, hand pressing down on your throat as his grip dropped from your chin to your neck. “Trying to hide things from me, my love is never wise. I thought you promised not to do anything stupid in my absense.” He tilted your head to the side, mask resting against your cheek as he sighed. “You should know by now I'm always watching. I always find out.” Your own hands squeezed at his wrist, desperately trying to get him to release you. “This is what happens when I let my pet off her leash it seems. How do you think it makes me look, hm? I have to hear that my own wife is carelessly parading around a battlefield from a low life general who's only aim is ridding himself of you. Did it feel good darling… did it? Tasting sweet little victory on your own. Do you like being without me?” You tried to shake your head, breath escaping you as Kylo's grip held firm. “And now I've had to drag myself out here, just to straighten up the mess that you clearly can't contain on your own.” As your eyes began to close, he let go; your tired body dropping to the floor in front of him. “In better circumstances, I’d enjoy seeing you so scarcely dressed, that beautiful little body of yours on show for me. Maybe I should punish you before dealing with the scum that crawl around here.” His mask tilted as he stood over you, rubbing his hands together as he scanned your body. Your mouth curled into a low growl, his words sparking a deep anger inside of you. “That does sound good to me… What do you think pet, should I show you what happens when you hide things from me? Should I ravage that little body of yours until you can’t walk… maybe that way you won’t go putting yourself in unnecessary danger behind my back.”

Before you had the chance to speak, a loud explosion ripped through the compound followed by a flurry of alarm bells and sirens.

The force of the explosion brought Kylo to his knees beside you, arm instinctively wrapping his cape around your small frame like a shield as he helped you stand. You looked up at him before turning to the window. Fires began to light around the compound, a large hole in the building's structure coming into view. Freeing yourself from the grasp of your husband, you quickly dressed into your armour and attached your weapon before running towards the centre of the explosion. Kylo followed closely behind as you both rushed past the dozens of terrified workers evacuating in the opposite direction.

Reaching the devastated remains of the loading bay, you were greeted with the salutes of troopers as well as the superior officers who had been gathered. Clear fragments of explosives could be seen littered around the room, implying someone was able to gain access to the building and place them. Rage filled your body, eyes growing dark as you walked over to the collapsing wall. Kylo grabbed your arm, stopping you from going too close in fear something could fall and hurt you or unexploded contraptions may still be active. 

You didn't turn to face him, simply halting your movement as his hand stayed on your arm. “Stand down, my love. I am here now. I will take care of this.” Your arm ripped away from his grip, body turning to him. As you tried to protest, he shifted his focus to the men cowering behind him. His actions caused a fury inside of you, mirroring the fires that burned outside.

You heard as each man desperately tried to find a way to make the whole thing sound as though they had no part in it. Each begging for their life to be spared as Kylo growled orders at them. Two storm troopers escorted one of the generals out of the room, tasked with evacuating the people as quickly as possible. This left the ones that had been appointed for the specific purpose of defending the barracks from intruders. Before Kylo could direct his anger to them, you intervened. This was your position and these were the men under your orders. You would not be pushed aside and ignored, so stood in front of Kylo as he went to speak once again.

“That's enough, Emperor.” Your expression was cold and vengeful, eyes dark and mouth curling into a snarl as you spoke. Hand, decorated with the ring Kylo had placed on your finger at your wedding ceremony weeks before, lifting up to silence him. “You may think you rule all, but this is my domain and these are my men. Remember it was you that gave me this job in the first place, leaving me with the bottom of a festering pile of waste your Order calls soldiers to deal with. I will be the one to hand them their fates. Not you.” His mask trained on you, shifting slightly as your posture remained unchanged even under his pressured glare. Your anger had killed off any fear or concern in your mind, hands clenching at your sides as your thirst for revenge became stronger with each second passing.

“I told you to stand down, pet. You had your chance here and look where it got you. Now let me clean up the mess so we can return home. I do not wish to have to tell you a-“ 

You'd had enough. Turning your back to him, cape whipping his arm as you did, your gaze fixed on the trembling figures watching the intense exchange. Their fearful eyes an admittance of guilt in your opinion; they knew their failures had caused this carnage, and so you believed they deserved punishment. As the walls around you continued to crumble, your hand rested on top of the weapon lying dormant at your hip.

“You know the cause of this was your disgusting arrogance. You know that you stand here, in front of this destruction because you couldn't even follow simple instructions.” Your voice was harsh and low, Kylo barely recognising it as he stood behind you. His arms crossed over his chest as your words startled him. “I was sent here to observe and tackle growing hostility from local vandals. You, the weak and pathetic cowards you are, told me that there was no real threat and my presence was not needed. Look around! Look at the damage your foolishness has caused. It's a disgrace that you stand here in front of your Emperor and commander and snivel like children. You want to beg for your life, then fine. Get on the floor and beg.” Kylo tried to step forward and stop you but your flat hand pressing against his chest held him back, other hand drawing your saber from your belt and igniting it. The men quickly dropped to their knees in front of you, one even bursting into tears under the unwavering pressure of your intimidating stare. Your name rang from the mask, Kylo's tone matching your own, warning you against continuing your actions. His hands reached up, unclasping the metal confines of his helmet and removing it entirely.

“That is enough now. You do not defy me in front of my men. I've ordered you to stand down and you shall do so immediately. You may be my wife, but I am your Emperor above everything else and so you will do as your told!” The words rang like alarms in your mind. Above everything else... The phrase, so cold and bitter, pushed away any remaining particle of your loving and forgiving nature. He valued his power and grip on you over your marriage; the idea like gasoline to the flame within you. 

Ready to explode, your head snapped towards him. The look in his eyes told you he knew what you were thinking, a glint of regret and sadness looming behind the harsh façade he was using in front of the officers. But it was too late for apologies. Too late for reconciliation. The rage had swallowed you and there was no you left inside. “If you are not with me, Kylo… then you are my enemy.” His hand slowly reached for your arm, touch soft as he tried to search for you in your own eyes, but he couldn't see you anymore. His words had dispersed any hope of you returning to him at this point. It was like you were possessed with a force far darker than you and he couldn’t find a way into your heart anymore. Your hand moved to tightly grip his arm, jolting it away from your body as your saber lifted towards him.

“Do not touch me… As you said, above everything you are the Emperor, so do not try to hold me as if you see me as anything more than another one of your slaves. You monster.” His face hardened, an ache in his heart growing as your words cut deep. It felt as though looking into your eyes was like looking into those of a stranger, and his careless words had caused it. One sentence was all it took to tip you over the edge in that moment. Kylo scanned your mind but could only find hurt and anger within you.

It was unacceptable. You would not admit defeat. This was meant to be your most triumphant moment, the chance to prove you were just as much of a leader as your husband, and it was ruined. Before your blade could meet the head of the men in front of you, it collided with its counterpart.

Kylo's saber blocked your swing, momentum of the collision knocking you backwards as sparks littered the floor. “That is enough!” His saber trained on you as you regained composure. “You do not want to do this. Please, my love. Stop.”

You smirked.

“You really want to stand in front of me Kylo? You dare stop me, when you are the one who gave me the position. You gave me this power and yet you defy me?” Your sabers collided once more, Kylo blocking a swing you had intended to meet his body.

“Stand down now, pet. You don't want to face me. I've trained you; I know your every thought. This won't end in the way you want it to.” You sensed an unnerving pulse of anger flowing from the man in front of you, his eyes burning into yours as a conflict of emotions fought on inside him. He didn’t want to fight you, from fear one of you would leave injured. But he couldn’t just stand by and let you do something you’d regret.

Even if you wanted to stop, you couldn't. The rage had taken over. Your kind heart caged by the fire within; it cried out as you began battling the man you loved. Scattering, the men whose lives were almost ended by your fury bolted to the door; too scared to witness the fight. Each swipe of glowing red accompanied a loud screech as the beams crashed against each other, neither of you allowing to other a chance to rest. All of your training had come down to this; your body a warhead that could no longer be contained. Each swipe, each attack showed how far you’d come and how far you were willing to go, even against the man who’d given it all to you. Smoke surrounded you as the fires raged on, walls collapsing and cries from outside echoing in unison with the cries of the blades. Kylo’s hand reached out, Force pushing you back as your blade just missed his head. His use of power felt like even more of a challenge to you, like you had to defeat him because he needed to rely on the Force when facing you. Your name fell on deaf ears, his calls for you to cease were not heard.

He looked inside your mind, seeing your frail and pleading heart scream out as the fire raged on inside. There was something else inside; a dark hooded figure controlling your actions while you cowered in the back. He tried to reach you, tried to pick up your crying soul and bring it back to the light but he couldn’t. Your saber caught his arm, grazing the armour and forcing him back into the real world.

Weapons resting against each other, your bodies came together. A battle for dominance ensued, the red reflection of the beams highlighting the anger and ferocity in your features. You tried pushing, at that moment you wanted to slaughter the enemy you saw in front of you. A growl escaped your lips, eyes not registering the man as anything other than a blockade to your goal. You briefly retreated, saber dipping under his defence and catching the back of his leg; a weakness you always exploited during training. Kylo winced as the beam scorched his skin, staggering backwards as the pain dimmed. A second powerful swing barely missed his chest, with a third cutting across his right arm. Kylo backed away briefly to allow his arm to stop hurting, skin burning as his eyes locked with yours; he couldn’t believe it was you stood in front of him. Your attacks becoming erratic and aggressive as your rage sought after retribution.

Anxious to end this, Kylo overpowered you, connecting his saber to yours once more. Twisting his blade and sending yours flying from your hands, your eyes locked with his for a second as you tried to reach for your weapon on the floor. Pain becoming too strong to ignore, the Force shot you across the room, roughly pinning you to the wall by your throat as your husband allowed his injured arm to drop to the side. Kylo stood, hand extended, panting as his body finally relaxed; no longer needing to protect himself.

You screamed out; a sharp piece of molten metal from the dismantling wall digging into your back and ripping into the skin just below your rib cage. Kylo’s actions had been reckless; desperation to end the fighting clouded any rational judgement as his power had impaled you against the crumbling interior. The cry tore through his heart, the Force leaving your throat as you fell to the floor. He ran over, grabbing your hand and examining the large wound now in your side. Blood began to spill from you, tears filling your eyes as the rage subsided.

Kylo’s hand reached for your cheek, pulling your gaze from the wound to his eyes. Heart breaking as he looked into yours, seeing the warmth of your glowing heart return for a mere second before pain replaced all other feelings inside you. 

You knew he never would’ve hurt you; he could’ve swung his saber at any point during the battle and ended you, his power had always outweighed yours. But he didn’t because he wanted to help you; he wanted to protect you from yourself. Now, you lay in his hands as the colour drained from your face. Kylo applied pressure to your wound, causing you to cry out in agony, pearls of sweat forming on your brow as you tried to focus on anything other than the pain. As his hand cupped the wound, you sighed; the pain disappearing for a brief second as your mind focussed on the feeling of having your husband so close. Realisation began to settle in your mind. You two were alone in a collapsing building, fires raged and everyone had evacuated to safety. No help was coming, no one was there besides the two of you. 

“Don’t think like that,” Kylo snapped, desperately trying to stop the bleeding as his own eyes filled with tears. “I won’t let you die, I won’t!” Pain and fear consumed his heart, breathing becoming erratic as he tried to figure out a way to save you.

His strong arms reached around and carefully picked you up, eyes darting around for any sign that help was near. You gripped his shoulder as your head dropped back, the pain from your side draining you of consciousness. Blood began to drip down his arm as Kylo steadied onto his feet, the wound in your side growing worse. 

With a quick flick of his hand, both of your weapons returned to his side as his eyes scanned the room. He ran through the door, holding his cape over you to shield you from the flames that were engulfing the building. With each passing second your life force slipped away, eyes struggling to stay open as Kylo ran through the halls trying to find a safe exit. “Stay with me love, please stay with me.” Kylo looked down at you, desperately trying to get your attention. 

Your hand felt from his shoulder, every ounce of strength helping you stay awake. Finally finding the exit, Kylo ran through. His breathing becoming heavy, smoke filling his lungs as he slowly placed you on the floor to catch his breath. As your body relaxed into the grass, a recon drone flew overhead desperately searching for you both. You saw Kylo tense, his hand reached out and called it over. Help was coming. The last thing you remember was Kylo dropping the floor next to you, lungs so full of smoke he could barely breath.


	23. Chapter 23

Pain engulfed your every nerve as you began to regain consciousness. Your body lay weak on the table aboard the imperial ship. 

Eyes darting around as much as possible; you were unable to locate your husband in the vessel. Two medics were trying to mend the hole in your side, one holding your body down as the other began to stitch the wound up. No one had anticipated the need for battle precautions; the mission was simply meant to be retrieving you, so the ship had not been properly equipped to deal with such a serious wound. A loud scream erupted from you; agony so strong that you nearly vomited. 

As soon as the cry left your lips you felt a familiar warm hand against your cheek, cold ring chilling your burning skin, eyes slowly lifting up to meet the worried gaze of Kylo as he stood over you. His eyes fearful and red, cheek singed from the flames he had carried your through. His arm was bandaged to protect the mark your saber had left. Voice gentle and low, his mouth resting against your ear as he cooed words of encouragement to try and calm you down as the medics finished sealing the gash as best they could. The ship raced back towards the capital, your body still growing weaker with every moment you didn't receive proper treatment. Kylo's hand never left your cheek, only releasing you when the emergency team met the ship at the arrival pad.

The surgery was long and painful. Because of the lack of blood in your system it was too dangerous to knock you out from fear the drugs would get into your brain at a more concentrated dosage. Metal from the melting wall had solidified into the wound, making it hard for the surgeons to clear you of debris and clean up the cuts. After hours of gruelling labour, the surgeons managed to remove all the foreign objects and applied proper stitches to help encourage a speedy recovery.

You lay in a dark, quiet room, left to your own devices per your request. Kylo had been rushed into emergency talks as soon as you were taken into theatre, and you had asked staff not to alert him about the end of your surgery just yet.

Time alone was all you needed right now, too tired and weak to try and face your husband. You knew he'd blame himself; you knew he'd worry and you couldn't bring yourself to offer him solace at this time. Flashbacks kept replaying in your mind, so intense you could still feel the heat of the sabers as they collided between you both. Never had you envisioned such a scene unfolding between the two of you. Seeing the memories in your mind felt as though you were watching someone else's life flash before you. 

It wasn't you fighting, it wasn't you trying to hurt him. Rage had become too much and you felt as though you were caged in your own mind. The idea of ever losing control like that again terrified you. It wasn’t who you were or who you wanted to be. You couldn’t allow yourself to become so consumed in such hate again.

You sighed and rolled over, pressing the button to alert the staff you wanted assistance. There was no point trying to prolong it, you knew he'd hear your thoughts sooner or later and come bursting in anyway. As the nurse entered, you asked her to find your husband and bring him to you. She simply nodded and left at pace to try and find him.

Within minutes Kylo walked in, slowly making his way over to you and sitting on the edge of the bed by your side. His eyes roamed you, examining your broken appearance. Your torso was covered only by bandages securing the stitches and protective covering over your wound. Skin was still pale as your body slowly accepted the blood given to you during your surgery. When his eyes met yours, his heart skipped a beat. Those beautiful shining orbs he loves so much, never truly losing their hopeful glimmer as you had finally been freed of the cage. He could see life and love in your eyes, their shine reminding him of who you really were. Silence, only the faint beeping of the heart rate monitor attached to you filled the air. Neither of you knew what to say, or how to approach what happened. His hand rested on top your yours, fingers playing with the rings that sat on your small digit. He smiled, running his finger over them as his eyes never left yours. A smile rested on your lips as his hand reached up to your cheek. Your head leant into his touch, letting him hold you up as your eyes closed while your body relaxed. A calm hum left you as Kylo’s fingers slowly brushed through your hair; the feeling so soothing it almost put you to sleep. Pecking his wrist, your eyes met once again as he leant down to leave a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“There’s my pretty girl” his eyes held so much pain as he looked down at the bandages surrounding your waist. “What am I going to do with you, my beautiful little one. Always getting into trouble.” You reached for him, hand resting on his thigh as he spoke. “I thought I lost you my dear, I really did.” A finger delicately grazed over the dressing, sighing as he looked back up to you. “For the first time, I really saw life slowly slipping from my grasp as the thought of losing you became real. Even when you were gone for so long, when you were in the arms of another man… I knew you’d come back to me. But this time, it really felt like you were gone. Gods,” he paused, focus being consumed as he looked to your gaze and losing his train of thought as you hung on his every word, “those eyes of yours get me every time.” A blush met the surface of your cheeks, smiling and stroking his leg as he spoke. You could see something was troubling him, his gaze distracted by something in his mind.

“Nothing comes above you my love… nothing. My position means nothing when compared to our bond. I didn’t mean what I said, you will forever be my only priority. My wife, my entire life force.” You nodded gently, moving your hand to rest on his as it sat by your wound.

“I don’t want to be a fighter Kylo… not anymore.” His head tilted, watching as your face became serious. “My role is protecting you, supporting you. It’s not on the battlefield, it’s by your side. I don’t want to go places and do things without you. I want to be with the people, teaching the next generation and helping those less fortunate. You are the fighter, the warrior…” you sighed, squeezing his hand. “I don’t want to lose control again. Please don’t make me, don’t let me.” Kylo carefully leant over you, arm supporting him on the opposite side of your body as his forehead rested on yours. 

“That’s my girl.” He smiled and kissed you slowly, lips parting as your hand tangled into his hair. You hummed as his tongue ran over your bottom lip, relaxing into his touch as the kiss washed away any pain left in your body. Breaking the kiss, Kylo sat up again and ran his thumb over your lip. “You know I serve you princess; whatever you want you can have. I don’t want to see you hurt ever again, so you will stay with me always. I will shield you from the cruelties of this existence. I will watch over you whatever you decide you want to do.”


	24. Chapter 24

Your recovery was difficult, but you were strong and refused to give up. Kylo made sure you were properly rested and tended for while he worked on ways to diminish the quarrels on the moon base. 

It took time; troops were promptly deployed and the vandals were eradicated. The wound healed; a scar left in its place as you got better. Once again, another reminder of how similar you were to your husband. A physical resemblance to the scars that had littered his body since you first met.

You didn’t blame him. Any other individual would resent the person who’d marked your fragile body in such a way, but your love was far too strong to see it as his fault. He loved you too much, cared too much to want to harm you at all, it was just an unfortunate accident. 

You weren’t injured anymore; you were stronger than a simple wound and so was your love for your husband. Once the battles had been won, you both decided to take time away from your duties in order to heal any wounds left over; physical or otherwise.

It had been so long since the two of you spent a day in bed together. Your time off so far had consisted of medical examinations and treatment, but today you both wanted to bask in each other’s company. Soft music playing in the background, your back rested against Kylo’s side as you played with the ring on his finger while his arm draped over your shoulder. 

“Do you remember the first time we were alone together?” You looked up at him as he smiled and nodded. “I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest. You've always been so sneaky I didn't even hear you come in.” You giggled, enjoying reminiscing on your earlier memories. “And of course, you happen to walk in at the moment I was bent over the table trying to reach the data pad that had fallen behind the cupboard.” He laughed and drew lazy circles on your arm. 

“Still one of the best views I've ever seen.” You lightly smacked his chest, causing you both to burst out laughing. 

“My soul nearly left my body when your hand grabbed my hip. I've never stood up so fast.”

Replaying it in your mind, you saw yourself straighten up as Kylo's body moved closer. It happened a few days after the second meeting; when he’d scared off the other man. Your back against his chest as the Force brought the data pad to your hands. “Struggling there kitten?” His hand squeezed your hip as his mask inched closer, resting on your shoulder. “Need me to look after you, to please you, baby?” Your jaw almost dropped, body aching at his every word. “Don't think I don't hear every nasty little thought that goes on in that head of yours, pet. I know you crave me; you work so hard just so I see you.” His hands spun you around, pinning you to the table and digging his growing erection into your thigh. You bit your lip as his free hand rested on your neck, thumb rubbing over your jawbone. “Gods, I'd fucking wreck you... right here, over this table. Bet you’d like that” Your eyes closed, chest heaving as Kylo released you and turned to walk away, leaving you aroused and confused.

Kylo smiled and held you tightly, “I've always loved teasing you darling. From the moment I saw you I wanted to be in your head, in your heart, as much as possible. When I saw the opportunity to have you alone, finally, I couldn't pass the chance to make your head spin.” You rolled your eyes, turning to face him as he stroked your cheek.

“I think the worst time was in the emergency board meeting... You bastard. I didn’t know what to do, or how you could leave me like that.” You giggled as you watched him think back, a smirk growing on his face as the memory of the event came back.

It was your first council meeting as Kylo's personal advisor, around a week after your initial night together. You'd never been invited to attend such an important event and your stomach flipped with nerves as you entered Kylo's individual seating area. It was secluded from the rest of the senate, located towards the top of the rows. You could see the rest of the room with ease, but because of your small frame no one could see you if you stayed seated. Once again, you found yourself alone with the masked figure as he walked in and closed the door before taking his seat beside you. A gloved hand rested on your thigh as soon as Kylo settled into his chair, face trained on the rest of the room as your gaze looked down at the hand and then back to your data pad. Thinking nothing of it, you began to brief him on his allocated talking points before the meeting commenced. Kylo hummed in recognition as you helped him prepare for his speech, but your focus faltered as his hand began to raise higher up your leg. As the leather digit met the hem of your skirt, the Supreme leader entered the hall; a signal for everyone to stand out of respect. Once the meeting officially began, you took your seat once more as Kylo remained stood; engaging in the debates whenever he felt appropriate. You gave occasional input from the cover of your seat, prompting Kylo whenever you felt he needed it or if he signalled for you to do so. As the discussion became more intense, you felt a hand returning to your thigh, but Kylo’s body had not moved from its position at the railing. The invisible hand parted your thighs and ran up your clothed slit. Lip catching between your teeth, you looked up to see Kylo’s hand at his side, gently moving and flicking as you realised what was happening. Your eyes closed, legs parting even more as you relaxed into the touch.

No longer feeling the need to engage with the current debate, Kylo returned to his seat next to you watching as your breathing became laboured. The teasing touch was becoming taunting and your need for pleasure made you whine when you felt the glove hand wrap around your throat. He tilted your head towards his, thumb parting your lips and pressing against your tongue.

Your eyes opened slowly, lips wrapping around the digit and sucking gently as his free hand dipped under your panties. A low hum left the mask as your body reacted to his every touch, hips bucking as he finally made contact with your clit. “Enjoying this are you pet?” He whispered as his finger rubbed harsh circles on your nub, moans trapped in your mouth as your tongue licked at the covered thumb inside. His fingers pressed against your throat, mask trained on your face as you whimpered and bucked your hips even more. “You like having me pleasure you in a room full of your superiors? You little slut, look at you. Whining and sucking on my thumb like a whore. Imagine if someone saw this, saw how needy you are to cum for me…” he chuckled, finger dropping from your clit and circling your entrance. Just before his finger dipped inside, all contact ceased as Kylo returned to his position at the railing leaving you soaked and panting in your seat. Reaching for your clit, a soft whimper left your lips as you pleasured yourself. Lip between your teeth, your eyes rolled back as your small digit penetrated you and began thrusting at a slow pace. Just as desire began to build within you, your hand was ripped away; both hands pinned to your sides by imperceptible restraints. 

Kylo’s arms crossed behind his back, gaze fixed on those speaking below as you began to squirm in your seat. His head slowly turned to face you, slowly walking over and standing between your legs. “Be a good girl, and behave for me, ok pet?” Kylo’s hand stroked through your hair, pulling your head towards his body and looking down at you. “Oh how I’d love to use that little mouth of yours right now… Gods, having you suck me off right here.” A groan escaped his mask as he contemplated the idea, you looking up at him through your lashes and licking your lips, a broken breath escapes you as your hips buck. “Don’t tease me pet, you won’t like what happens when you do.” His hand runs over your jaw, tilting your head to the side. “I could use you however I want couldn’t I pet? So desperate to please your commander, whenever he wants you.”

You sat up in bed, Kylo watching you as you turned and kneeled beside him. “I never did get you back for that, you know…” your eyes roamed his body as your mind began to wander. “You always get away with teasing me, leaving me on the edge.” He smirked and sat up, hand resting on your cheek as his thumb ran over your bottom lip. 

“That’s because you love it really, don’t you baby? You enjoy being toyed with; you love when I tease you.” He was right; he knew you far too well and knew how much of an effect he has on you. You caught his thumb between your teeth and growled playfully. He laughed and moved his face towards yours, noses touching as you shook your head with his thumb still between your teeth. “My little pet wants to play, does she?” He laughed and pounced on you, pinning you to the mattress as his hand fell from your mouth. You screamed, body bouncing as Kylo dropped on top of you.

Chuckling, his hands pinned yours next to your head while his forehead rested on yours. “Want a fight do you… well, bring it on little one.” You smiled and used your feet to push him off, his body falling backwards. As his back collided with the bed, you jumped up and sat on his chest while your fingers interlocked with his. You began to wrestle, flipping over and over as each of you tried to stay on top of the other. Without paying attention, you both rolled off the bed and onto the floor, your body falling on top of Kylo’s as you started to giggle. Your legs on either side of his waist, hands flat on the floor next to his head as you looked down at the man smiling below you. “Oh no, you got me,” he faked pain as you poked his sides, fingers tickling his torso. Kylo’s head dropped back, eyes closing as he played dead beneath you. Smiling, you jumped up and decided to join in the dramatics. 

“Finally, I got him. Ha, its time I escape!” You began to run towards the door, but were lifted into the air and spun around.

Kylo stood and walked over to you, grabbing your body in his own hands and holding you in the air. Without warning, he threw you over his shoulder and began to spin. “You’re not going anywhere little one, you’re all mine”. He laughed and smacked your bottom, your squeals only making him spin faster. 

“Kylo stop! Stop I’m gonna puke!” Kylo jumped onto the bed, throwing you up into the air as he did and catching you as his own body hit the mattress. Holding you up above him, his hands suddenly left you. Tensing as you prepared to drop, your arms covering your face as you waited to collide with the man below you. Your eyes peered through your hands, seeing an amused grin on Kylo’s face as your body remained suspended in the air. “You’re such an arse you know.” He laughed as you stuck your tongue out at him. His arms stretched behind his head, relaxing as he took in the view above him. 

“I rather like you like this pet, just dangling there for me to admire.” He smirked and tilted his head, meeting your gaze as you reached your arm down in an attempt to poke him. “I also like how small you are, those little arms just can’t reach can they?” he laughed and sat up, face just inches away from yours.

“Are you going to let me down yet you pervert, or am I going to dangle here forever?” His brow furrowed, faking deep contemplation as you giggled. His hands gripped your waist, slowly bringing you down onto his lap. “That’s much better” you smiled and kissed him, hands cupping his cheeks as he rubbed soothing circles into your hipbones. As your lips parted, your foreheads rested against each other and your eyes locked. 

“You like to call me a pervert little one, and yet…” he caught your bottom lip in his teeth for a moment, pulling it and letting it drop back, “you always beg me to touch you. Beg daddy to please you. So really, which one of us is the perverted one?” 

You smirked and kissed his cheek, mouth resting by his ear as you whispered “like you always say my love, I’m just like you. Just as sick, as nasty and as greedy as you are…” you kissed his neck just below his ear, moving to the other side of his face. “maybe I love when you eye fuck me, hm? Maybe I crave that filthy mouth spitting teases in my ear. Gods, you should know by now I do love being your little slut.” One more kiss was left below his ear before you removed yourself from his grip. Your forehead rested on his as you smirked and whispered, “daddy’s little slut,” before crawling across the bed and settling against the pillows at the head. Kylo sat stunned, lip between his teeth as he looked over at you. It was rare that you got so bold with your words, especially with any kind of sexual motivation. He was used to your defiance and your independence by now, but dirty talk always caught him off guard.

That was the exact reaction you wanted; it was your turn to tease him as much as you could. You didn’t want him; you didn’t even feel particularly in the mood. It just made you feel powerful to see him silenced by your words. Flashing him the most innocent smile you could, lashes fluttering as your lip caught between your teeth.

Kylo’s eyes closed, taking a deep sigh before opening once again and crawling over to you. His body rested next to yours, hand immediately running over your hip and down your thigh. His lips attached to your neck, arm wrapping around your waist and bringing your back flush against his chest. You smiled, enjoying the sensation of his lips on you as his hand gripped the waistband of your pyjama shorts. “Ah, mister. I don’t know where you think that hand is going, but you better behave yourself.” A rough bite tugged at the skin of your collarbone, a frustrated grunt leaving your husband as his hand lay flat on your stomach. You sighed in content, hand reaching back to pull his hair and drag his face away from your neck. Kylo growled, hand digging into your thigh as he became more aroused and frustrated. You turned to face him, soft and playful eyes meeting his dark, lustful ones. “Baby boy… I just want to cuddle.” You smiled and placed a loving peck on his lips before nuzzling your head into his chest, arms wrapping tightly around his waist. You could feel his erection brushing against your thigh; your plan was a success and you finally got a taste of teaching him a lesson. Realising you were being serious, Kylo’s body slowly relaxed; his rough grip on your thigh becoming the soothing embrace of his strong arms around your waist.

“You really are a cheeky little minx my love.” He smiled and kissed your forehead, sighing as you looked up at him and rested your hands on his shoulders. “Only you can rile me up so much, and get away with it so effortlessly. My darling wife, such a naughty little one.” You smiled, tongue poking out of your mouth slightly as you gave him a cheeky wink. 

“But my husband, isn’t that why you love me so much?” your lips gently pressed against his, stroking his cheek with your thumb as he pulled your body against his own. “You would get bored with me if I didn’t keep you on your toes so much. An Emperor deserves a challenge; an exciting life. That’s why I’m here.” His hand reached up to caress your cheek, smiling and leaving a kiss on your nose. 

“So true my darling, so true.” Holding each other tightly, Kylo tiled his head down towards you. “My love… how would you feel about running the new training facility that is opening within the capital?” Your brow furrowed as you looked up into his eyes. “Someone needs to teach the new generations the right morals and how to be who their destiny sets out for them to be. I think the best person for that is you. I know that’s what you love doing. You always light up when you spend time with the local children, so… will you do it love?” Your lips connected to his, hands cupping his cheeks as you nodded against his mouth. Kylo smiled and held you close, melting into the kiss. Finally, you felt you were going to do something you really could be proud of.


	25. Chapter 25

You'd finally found your true passion. Teaching and training the next generation was your calling and something you excelled at. Kylo couldn't have been prouder of you; seeing you happy and making a difference was all he wanted for you. He would take the time to come and visit your class when he had little work to do, something both you and the younglings enjoyed. 

The way he interacted with the children always warmed your heart; so gentle and understanding with them. Thoughts of him caring for a child of his own would spin around as you watched the kids listen in awe to every word he said. A gentle smile would grow on his face whenever you considered having a child, as if he was listening in on what you were thinking. But there were your duties and responsibilities to consider; neither of you had a lot of time outside of your work. You knew that a child would require a commitment that you just couldn't give right now.

Kylo always made time for you outside of his duties. Even though you were usually a part of those as well, he made sure that there were times you could both switch off and enjoy each other's company.

Things had changed since your injury in the barracks; being so close to losing you again ignited something in Kylo. He couldn't allow another real chance of you being hurt or leaving. Life would lose all meaning if you were to disappear, so he used every spare second tending to you.

Your birthday was coming up and the one thing you had requested was for the two of you to go back to the retreat on your home planet for a few days as a break from hectic imperial life. Kylo happily welcomed the idea, putting his energy into making plans to cover both of your responsibilities for a while so you could both get away without worrying. You were scheduled to fly out that afternoon, so spent the morning packing for yourself and your husband while he made his final checks around the command centre. 

The winter months had rolled in, so you tried to pack for warmth and comfort. Turning to the door you saw Kylo walk in, smile beaming as he wrapped his arms around you. His lips left soft kisses on your cheek as you continued to pull clothes from the wardrobe, arms holding your waist tightly. “Ready to go my darling? I can’t wait to have you all to myself in front of that fire place. Have you, all to myself…” his teeth caught your earlobe, your eyes closing as your lip caught in your teeth, “no interruptions, no worries. I can have you however I like for as long as I like.” He smirked and kissed your collarbone, teeth dragging over your skin as you hummed. 

“So that’s why you want to get away…” you giggled and turned to face him, “not to relax, or to spend time with your wife for her birthday…” your hands rubbed up his chest, resting on the sides of his neck as he smiled down at you, “you just wanted to fuck as much as possible. Pervert.” He laughed and rested his forehead on yours, one hand reaching up to cup your cheek while his thumb caressed your bottom lip. 

“What’s wrong with that baby? You’re telling me you don’t like the idea of cumming, over and over for days…” His thumb pushed past your lips, resting on your tongue as your lips wrapped around the digit. “Doesn’t my princess want to spend her birthday being pleasured as much as her husband can give, as relaxed and euphoric as possible.” Your eyes closed as you relaxed into his touch, mouth sucking lightly on his thumb. He smirked and removed the digit from your mouth, attaching his lips to yours instead. Your hands tugged at his hair as his body pinned you to the wardrobe, your frame at the mercy of his touch. Your tongue slipped past his lips, gently lapping at his own as he moaned against you. Before you allowed yourself to get too consumed in the embrace, you pulled away and smiled. 

“I need to finish packing or we aren’t going anywhere.” He smiled and kissed your forehead before moving to sit on the bed.

You quickly worked to grab the last remaining items you needed, placing them in your bag and zipping it up all while Kylo sat admiring you from the bed. Once you had finished you turned and walked over to your husband, standing between his legs and placing your hands on his shoulders. “Are you staring at me sir?” your hands gently massaged his strong frame, fingers working into the muscles as a content hum fell from Kylo’s lips. 

“Just admiring the view my love, that’s all. I can’t help looking at such a pretty girl when she’s all mine.” You giggled and straddled his lap, hands moving to soothe his tense, overworked body. Kylo’s eyes closed, enjoying the feeling of your petite hands running over his shoulders. You left a light kiss on the tip of his nose, smile mirroring the one growing on your husband’s face. 

“Is it time to go yet?” his eyes opened and looked up into yours, hands smoothing over your thighs. 

“Does my wife want to go now?” you nodded, giggling as he stood with your body clinging to him. His strong arms held you tight against his frame, not letting you drop back onto the floor. “Shall I just carry you there, like you’re my baby?” you shook your head and smiled, turning his head to face you and pecking his lips. 

“Put me down crazy man, let’s get going.” One last kiss was left on your lips before Kylo released you from his grip. Grabbing the bags, you both began walking to the landing bay where Kylo’s personal craft was waiting for you. The journey was quick and smooth, you sat watching the stars shoot by just as you always did. Excitement overcome you as the beautiful red fields came into view, beauty intensified by the thin veil of snow sprinkled across the landscape.

Walking into the house melted any stress or tension in you away, the roaring fire instantly calming you as you placed your bag at the bottom of the stairs. Servants took your belongings upstairs as you sat on the large sofa by the fire, enjoying the warmth radiating from the flames. Two large hands gripped your shoulders, slowly beginning to massage the skin as your hands had done earlier. Your head rocked forward, humming as your husband dug his thumbs into your flesh; working to untangle your nerves as a moan left your lips. 

“Shh now my pet, don’t get too carried away while we have company.” His lips connected to your temple, a smile forming on your face as you closed your eyes. “You know I’ll make you scream as soon as we’re alone. But for now, relax and let daddy take care of you.” A blush crept up into your cheeks, tongue darting over your bottom lip as you held in the moans threatening to leave you. Kylo’s hands expertly worked over you, freeing you of the knots that had formed from the stress of work. “That’s it my darling, just relax… you know it feels good. You know my hands work your body perfectly.” You smiled and nodded, his fingers running up the back of your neck massaging the skin as you sighed. 

The sound of the door shutting behind you both signalled that you were finally alone, teeth biting down on your bottom lip as Kylo’s hands slid over your shoulders and down the front of your chest. His hands began massaging your breasts, soft moans falling from your lips as his lips began marking your neck. “All alone now darling… all mine to play with.” You felt him smirk against the skin of your neck before biting down harshly, a broken cry left you as your hands covered his own on your chest urging them to squeeze harder. Kylo chuckled against your skin, lips moving up to rest on your cheek. “Getting needy now are we pet? Wasn’t it you that just wanted to relax on this trip… you were the one judging me for wanting to please you, and now look at you,” one hand reached down and slipped under your dress, a finger running up your clothed slit, “I’ve barely touched you and yet you’re falling apart.” His hands left your body entirely as he walked around to stand in front of the sofa, positioning himself between your legs as your eyes peered up at him.

Slowly dropping to his knees, Kylo’s hands rubbed up your thighs and to your hips. He pulled your body towards him, you sinking down until your legs draped over his shoulders. Hands stroking through your husband’s hair, you smiled as he left gentle kisses on your thighs. “You look so beautiful in this light darling, on your knees for me. The leader of the new world kneeling before his queen.” You smiled as his eyes met yours, hands tugging your panties off and licking his lips. 

“My queen, I love when you get so confident… so cheeky.” He placed a kiss just above your clit, your lip catching between your teeth. “You know exactly how to push my buttons, to make me lose control. You have me under your spell.” One slow lick was delivered to your slit, a soft whimper falling from you as your hands reached for Kylo’s hair. His tongue began lapping at your sensitive clit, eyes never leaving your face as soft moans of his name began to tumble from your tongue. His hand left your thigh, digit circling your entrance as his lips suctioned onto your clit. One finger entered you, pumping slowly as your grip on his hair tightened, hips bucking up seeking more friction. Kylo’s tongue moved quickly against your clit, sucking harshly as his finger gained pace. One more digit was added, moving in unison as you began to crumble above him. 

“Fuck, baby that feels so good… gods you’re so good at this.” His free arm laid across your hips, pinning you in place as he moaned against your pussy. You could feel your climax becoming imminent, moans becoming frantic and pleasure overwhelmed you. Kylo’s face pulled away, fingers pumping into you at a furious pace. His smirk slick with your arousal, eyes trained on your face as your head dropped back. 

“I want you to look at me baby, look at me when you cum. I want to see you unravel under my touch. I know you’re close, I can feel it.” Mouth hanging open, your head rocks forward so your eyes met the lust filled gaze of your husband between your legs. His tongue darted across his lips, catching your arousal and groaning as he added a third finger to the assault. The look he gave you tipped you over the edge, his name coming out as a laboured scream as your body jolted from the intense pleasure surging through you. Hands tugging his hair, thighs coming together, your orgasm drained you; pleasure too intense. 

You collapsed back against the sofa, panting furiously as Kylo climbed from the floor to hold himself above you. “Gonna clean me up like a good girl?” He smirked as you nodded and sat forward, your tongue gliding over his chin as you tasted yourself on his skin. Your hand held his chin in place as you lapped at his cheek and over his lips. Your tongue caught between his teeth as his hand glided up to rest on your throat, smiling as you whimpered. His mouth released your tongue before connecting his lips to yours, hand on your throat pulling you in closer. Your hand on his chin moved to rest on his shoulder, smiling against his lips as your name fell from him as a long moan. You pulled away, resting your forehead on his; you admired his eyes that looked so deeply into yours. “You are so beautiful, my darling. How did I manage to claim the most precious treasure in the known universe? Right here in my arms where she belongs, where she’ll stay.” You blushed and looked down, lip catching in your teeth as Kylo left soft kisses on both of your cheeks. You spent the rest of the afternoon in each other’s embrace, relaxing in front of the fire.

That evening, Kylo seemed distracted. It was as though something was playing on his mind as you sat down for dinner, focus drifting in and out of your conversation. Once you had finished eating, Kylo suggested you take a walk through the fields; something you happily agreed to. As you strolled side by side, you turned to your husband and decided to pick at his brain. 

“Something the matter my love? You’ve been so quiet this evening… You’re worrying me.” Kylo smiled and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you into his side as you both continued walking. 

“My darling, can I ask you something?” You stopped walking and turned to face him fully, hands reaching for his as you caught his gaze. 

“Of course you can Kylo, you can always ask me anything.” His hand left yours and rested on your cheek, stroking softly as his eyes searched yours for answer. 

“Will you ever give me an heir my love?” You were taken aback slightly, not expecting such a question. You looked down at the floor as you began to think over what he said. “I know you’ve been thinking about it lately; your mind has been toying with the idea ever since you started your new job. I just want you to know that nothing would bring me more joy than having a child of our own. I’d love to be able to give you a baby if that is what you want.” His hand guided your gaze back up to face him, lips coming down to yours in a tender kiss. Your hands rested on his waist, smiling against his touch as your mind raced with ideas and answers. As you moved away, you let out a quiet sigh before speaking. 

“It’s true, I’ve thought about it a lot lately. I’ve always wanted to be a mum, always wanted to look after a child of my own. I just…” you looked up into his eyes again, “I don’t know if I’m ready yet. There’s so much going on already, I’m scared we just don’t have the time. I want us to be as strong as possible and to welcome a child into the perfect world. I couldn’t bear to think of bringing life into the world only for us to neglect them because we’re too busy.” He nodded, watching as you sighed once more before pulling you into a tight embrace. “I want to, it’s not that I don’t. But one day, not yet…” He kissed the top of your head and rubbed your back, soothing you as your body became tense whilst anticipating his response. 

“My darling relax, its fine. I just wanted you to know where my head was, that’s all,” he lifted your head once more, pecking your lips softly before smiling, “I have everything I could need right in front of me. It was just voicing a thought. Don’t worry, you know I would never pressure you into something like that. When we are both ready, it will happen.” His reassurance calmed your anxiety as quickly as it flared; the fact he would wait until you felt ready showed you how much he valued your comfort and safety. It made you calm and helped you feel confident in the future of your marriage. The conversation was reassuring as you were both on the same page. You continued your walk, enjoying the peace of the fields as the suns began to disappear behind the horizon. Fingers interlocked, your head rested on your husband’s arm as you began to head back to the fort.

Stepping through the front door, Kylo helped you remove your coat and led you upstairs. Climbing into bed, you giggled as your husband scooped you up and brought you to lay on his chest. You made yourself comfortable on top of him, playing with a single strand of hair that cascaded down his forehead. He smiled and stroked his hands over your hips, letting them rest on your arse. Kylo massaged the skin gently as you smiled down at him, kissing him slowly as your hands combed into his hair. You felt him smile against your lips, his hands applying more pressure as you whimpered. Disconnecting your lips, you kissed his cheek and let your head rest against his shoulder. “Happy we got away baby?” you nodded and looked into his eyes, placing a kiss on his nose. 

“I’m always happy when I have you to myself.”

It was your birthday – a day you would choose to ignore given the chance, but your husband insisted on celebrating. You woke to an empty bed; Kylo had arisen early and disappeared. 

As you sat up, you realised the floor was covered in a blanket of red petals. Smiling, you climbed out of bed and made your way downstairs. Kylo had arranged for the cooks to put out a vast spread of your favourite foods for breakfast which was being finished as you walked into the large kitchen. The chefs smiled and bowed before continuing their final dishes. 

Searching for your husband, you walked into the living room, but to your disappointment he wasn’t there. A small piece of paper with your name on it sat on the sofa, setting out a small list of instructions on how to find your present. You smiled and shook your head, putting the paper down and following the instructions. Details leading you out the front door, you walked into the middle of the field as the paper had said. A box sat waiting for you, the lid secured by a single red ribbon. You scanned your surroundings for any sign of Kylo; failing to see him you lifted the lid of the box. Biting your lip, you lifted the beautiful new dress into the air. Its red lace pattern was perfect, the slim black solid fabric underneath soft and shiny. It was exactly your style, suiting you so well. Under the dress, another note waited. This time it simply said turn around. Quickly shifting your body, you were met with your favourite smile as your husband stood with a black jewellery box in his hand. 

“I thought I told you I didn’t want presents.” You smiled and placed the dress back in its box, walking over to Kylo as his hand extended for you to take. 

“If I can’t spoil my princess on her birthday, then when can I spoil her?” He brought you to his chest and kissed you, fingers interlocking with yours as you moved back. 

“You spoil me all the time Kylo, don’t act like you don’t.” You giggled as he shook his head. 

“My girl deserves the universe at her feet, and that is what I give her. But for today, I thought she deserved a few material gifts too.” You took the small box from his hand, eyes gleaming up at him before looking down to the silk box. As it opened, your jaw dropped. Inside sat the most beautiful diamond necklace; a stunning collar littered with jewels shining as bright as any star. Your finger ran over the necklace, smile beaming as you looked back up at the man in front of you. 

“Kylo… I, I don’t know what to say… it’s beautiful.” Closing the box, you jumped into his arms. Free hand wrapping into his hair, you pulled him into a passionate kiss, his arms wrapping around your waist as your legs tangled around his. Moving back, you rested your forehead against his as he smiled up at you. 

“My pet needed something pretty, so I thought she’d like the best jewels this galaxy could offer. Can’t be daddy’s kitten without a collar.” You giggled and kissed him once more, smile refusing to fade as you disconnected. “Come on now love, let’s get back inside. Breakfast will be waiting for us by now.” Unwrapping your legs, your feet reached the floor once again as Kylo picked up the dress box and led you back inside. Waiting on the kitchen table was the biggest bouquet of flowers you’d ever seen, Kylo kissing your cheek as you looked in awe. He pulled out a chair for you at the table, guiding you to sit as your eyes darted around the incredible spread laid out for you both.

After stuffing yourself as much as you could, you retired to the living room and collapsed onto the sofa. Too full to move, you giggled as your husband collapsed next to you. “If this is what being pregnant feels like, I really don’t look forward to it.” You giggled and looked over to Kylo as he smiled and kissed your cheek. 

“Is my queen enjoying her birthday?” you nodded and rolled onto your side, arm draping over Kylo’s chest as his arm snaked underneath you to pull you against him. A gentle kiss was left on the tip of your nose as Kylo rubbed circles into your hip. “What if I were to tell you I had one more surprise in store for you, pet?” your brow furrowed, head tilting as a mischievous look grew on his face. 

“Oh no, I don’t like that look on your face… it never ends well for me.” A laugh fell from Kylo’s lips as he hid his face in your neck.

“Well, actually… there’s two things. We are going out in a while for your first birthday treat, and then by the time we get back the final surprise will be ready.” Your arms wrapped around his neck, holding him close with your hand stroking through his hair. 

“You don’t need to do all this you know. I’ve already had so much… you treat me all the time anyway, today doesn’t need to be special.” He hummed as you played with his hair, your own smile growing while you felt him melt into your touch. Kylo started leaving kisses across your neck, hand holding the other side as your eyes closed. 

“You deserve it darling, all this and more. Now come on, let’s go get ready. Transportation will be here soon.” You whimpered as he stood, body feeling cold without his beside you. Your husband smiled and lifted you from the sofa, carrying you upstairs and into your bedroom.

The journey was short; Kylo wrapping his arm around your waist as you departed the speeder. The area felt familiar to you, but you couldn’t work out why. Confused, you looked around as Kylo led you to the cliffside which overlooked the same red fields you enjoyed walking through. Looking over, you saw the compound in the distance, the view of the fields breath-taking. “Why are we here?” Turning to your husband, his smile gleaming as your head tilted. 

“Look around darling, search your mind and you’ll see why.” You walked over to the edge, eyes scanning every inch of scenery as your brain skimmed every memory it could recall. As you went to question Kylo once more, it hit you. 

Tears filling your eyes, hand covering your mouth; it all came flooding back. Kylo’s arms wrapped around your waist as your side rested against his chest, his lips pressing a gentle kiss to your head. “H…how did you k-“ you couldn’t even find the words, emotions so strong as the images replayed in your head. 

This is where your parents got married, this cliff was the same one you’d seen in the holograms recorded on the day. You could see it, clear as day, the image of your parents’ hand in hand at the edge as they said their vows. The ceremonial floral arch no longer standing, but the view as beautiful as the pictures. 

“I’ve told you before pet, your dreams speak volumes. So vibrant, so vivid.” He began to rock you slowly as you held him close, feelings of love and loss becoming too much. “You never wondered why I chose that field, that area to make our home? I wanted you to feel close to them… as much as I could.” You looked up at him, eyes teary but smile bright as you cupped his cheek and kissed him softly. Kylo smiled and tangled one hand into your hair, holding you close as your tender kiss caused soft moans to fall from your lips. Parting slightly, Kylo kissed your nose before speaking. “The surprise is… a monument is going to be built here. A statue, of your parents. As they said their vows, right here immortalized forever. I’ve designed it myself, using your dreams as a guide. A place you can always come to remember them, to see them.” You couldn’t help but start to cry, heart so full of love and admiration you couldn’t contain it. His hands cupped your cheeks, thumbs wiping your tears away as he left soft kisses on your forehead. 

“Kylo I… I don’t know what to say… I can’t even think of how to thank you.” His lips silenced yours, kissing you as your arms wrapped around his neck. Kylo’s strong frame lifted you into the air, your legs wrapping around his waist as his arms hooked under your bottom. Tongue slipping past your lips, Kylo groaned as your hand tugged the hair at the back of his neck. Your lips parted for a moment, Kylo biting your bottom lip and smirking. 

“I think we should continue this when we get home pet, this isn’t the place for those kinds of naughty thoughts.” You nodded and smiled, leaving one last kiss on his lips before releasing him from your grip and straightening your dress. You took his hand as he led you back to the speeder, holding you close while you were transported back to the compound.

Before opening the door, you looked up to your husband as he stood by your side. “You said there would be something waiting when we get back… I’m not sure I want to open this door.” Kylo laughed, placing his hand on the door and pushing it open. You bit your lip, watching as it swung open. Everything seemed calm, normal; it concerned you. 

“Come on pet, in you go.” His calm nature made you anxious, slowly walking in as he followed and shut the door behind you. Nothing stood out as different, which made you confused. Your eyes darted around the room looking for any sign of Kylo’s surprise. His hand gently placed on your lower back as you turned to him. “Stop looking so worried pet, it’s hardly going to be a ronto charging at you.” You smiled and nodded, finally letting yourself relax. “If you must know, you have to go upstairs to find it. In the bedroom.” His smile made your mind wander as you slowly climbed the stairs towards your bedroom. 

The petals still decorating the floor as you walked in, Kylo following closely. On the bed lay a beautiful silk robe with feather details on the sleeves. Resting on top of that sat a dainty charm bracelet, a singular red flower charm hanging from the links as well as a silk blindfold that matched the robe. You grinned up at your husband before turning and picking up the bracelet. The charm was small and delicate, it hung from the middle of the chain and held a single diamond in the centre of the petals. Kylo’s arms snaked around your waist, kissing your cheek as you studied the jewellery in your hand. “Now, you always have a piece of home with you. Even when we aren’t here, you can carry it with you as a reminder of our safe space.” Your head rested on his shoulder, looking up at him as your smiled matched his. 

“Will you put it on for me, my love?” Kylo nodded and took the bracelet from you, leaving a kiss on your neck as he fastened the jewellery around your extended wrist.

His lips didn’t leave your skin, kissing down from your earlobe to your collarbone as his hands ran up from your wrist. One held your neck, keeping you still as his lips continued to attach themselves to your longing skin. Each kiss grew more teasing, Kylo beginning to suck light bruises into your flesh as you whimpered at the feeling. His other hand came into contact with your chest, squeezing one of your breasts harshly. His name fell from you in a broken moan, a smirk forming on his lips as his teeth dug into your neck. “How about my precious puts on her new robe and then lets me take care of her? I want to see you unravel in nothing but the pretty silk daddy got for you.” You head nodded quickly as Kylo released you from his grip.

He took a seat on the bed and watched as you slowly undressed in front of him. Lip caught in his teeth, Kylo’s eyes devoured you as you stood between his legs in just your underwear. Reaching back, you unclipped your bra and let it fall onto his lap. Your hands rested on his shoulder, body bending so your eyes became level with his. “Will you get my robe for me, Emperor Ren?” you left a sweet kiss on the corner of his mouth, his tongue catching your bottom lip before you moved away. Kylo picked up the robe and signalled for you to turn around. His hands guided the fabric along your arms until it rested on your shoulders. His grip left the robe and landed on your hips, holding you in place as his eyes scanned the sight in front of him. Looking back over your shoulder, you bit your lip and ground your arse against his growing erection. As you did, the grip on your waist tightened; Kylo groaned and pulled you back against him. 

“Trying to tease me pet?” his hand smacked your right cheek, the contact on your bum making you moan. “Little birthday girl wants to get naughty, does she? Want me to punish her, the pretty little slut.” Each sentence and question were punctuated with a smack to your bottom, moans becoming louder as the stinging on your skin made your core ache. Kylo lifted you up and threw you on the bed, smirking as you giggled and straightened yourself up. He began crawling over to you, hands gripping your ankles and pulling you down towards him.

Your lips connected to his as soon as they were level, gripping his hair and moaning as his hips began grinding into yours. Hands gliding down the back of his neck, you pulled at his clothing as a signal for him to get undressed. Once you were both finally free of any clothing, the robe the only piece of fabric on either of you, Kylo’s finger began drawing slow circles on your clit. Your head dropped back against the pillows, eyes closing as whimpers left you. “Tell me what you want darling, I’m here to serve you… whatever you want, just tell me.” His lips attached to your neck once more, sucking marks into the skin as you moaned. 

“Make love to me Kylo, please. I want it slow… fuck, I want you to show me how much you love me.” He smiled and looked into your eyes, guiding himself into you as your lip caught in your teeth. Kylo whimpered, your name dropping from his mouth as he filled you. Your hands sat on the sides of his neck, bringing his face to yours as you kissed him softly. Hips beginning to move, Kylo’s thrusts were deep but slow; just like you asked. 

The kiss was so tender and passionate, the feeling between your legs making your toes curl, you couldn’t stop the moans dripping from your tongue. Lips parting, Kylo’s tongue tangled with your own as one of his hands continued to circle your clit. “This what you like baby? Fuck, you always feel so good…” you smiled and bit his bottom lip as Kylo’s eyes closed, rhythm faulting as he approached his own release. Your finger traced the scar on his face, smiling as he brought his lips back down to yours. Nearing your high, your legs wrapped tightly around your husband’s waist bringing him deeper into you. The slow pace brought new levels of euphoria as your climax finally hit you, head dropping back and chest arching into the man above you. Your eyes clamped shut as your body shook from the intense pleasure; all the emotions from today charging your orgasm to reach new heights. Kylo’s pace began to quicken as he sought after his own release. You brought his face down to yours, kissing him as your hands tangled in his hair. Your name fell from his lips as you tugged his hair, a moan falling into your mouth as Kylo’s hips became relentless. As your own climax began to subside, Kylo collapsed on top of you; his release washing over him and draining his energy. You left gentle kisses on his cheeks as his face rested on your shoulder, your fingers running up and down his spine while he caught his breath.

“Thank you for this amazing birthday love… I couldn’t ask for more.” Kylo’s head rose as he looked down at you and smiled, kissing you softly. His softening member slipped from you as he rested on the bed beside you, lips not parting as you cupped his cheek and pulled him close. You hummed against his lips, happiness overflowing from the day you had shared with your husband, his hands smoothing over your hips as he pulled you flush against him.

Lips finally parting, Kylo brushed his nose against yours causing you to giggle. “Are you happy baby? That’s all I need to know.” You nodded and kissed him once more before resting back onto the bed. Kylo held you tightly against him as his hands gently rubbed circles into your back. “I’m glad you’ve enjoyed today. Tomorrow we can just spend the day relaxing. But we will have to go back after that, you know they’re all useless without us.” Nodding, you nuzzled your head into his neck and sighed; tiredness beginning to take over. “How about we have a little nap and then this evening a candle lit dinner, just us?” Looking up for a moment, you pecked his lips, 

“that sounds perfect Kylo, thank you.” Holding onto each other, you both drifted off into a deep and peaceful sleep.


	26. Chapter 26

Waking up in your husband's arms, you smiled as you noticed he was still sleeping. Kissing his nose softly, you left small pecks all over his face until he finally woke up. Once his eyes opened you giggled and kissed him, cupping his cheeks and bringing his face close to yours. You felt him smile against you, his hands resting on your arse as you bit his lip. A quick squeeze of your bum made you release his lip and smile, resting your forehead against his. "You should always wake me up like that pet, it would make my mornings so much better..." he began massaging the skin in his hands, making you bite your lip and close your eyes. "Although, I don't think I'd be able to get out of bed and go to work if I had your lips on mine."

"I couldn't just let you sleep, you promised me a candle lit dinner sir." He chuckled and sat up, taking in the sunset glowing in through the window. "Plus, I wanted to watch the sunset with you." You sat up beside him, looking out the window as you leant against him. "There's something special about the way the flowers glow when the sun sets here. Only in the winter though, when the suns are low." Kylo's arms wrapped around you, chin resting on your shoulder as he kissed your neck. 

"Its beautiful love, but nothing compared to those eyes of yours. I lose myself in those eyes every time you let me in." Blushing, you let your head drop back against his shoulder as your gaze settled on him. The setting sun illuminated his harsh features; his strong jawline highlighted and dark eyes glowing in the dim light. Eyes shining down at you, Kylo found himself lost in your stare. Neither of you could turn away, the intensity of the eye contact locked you in place as the sun set behind you. Finally looking away, you blushed and climbed out of the bed. "Come on, we'll cook together yeah?" you held you hand out, Kylo taking it and raising from his spot.

Quickly finding some comfortable clothes, you dressed and made your way downstairs together. Walking into the kitchen, Kylo lifted you up and placed you sitting on the counter. You smiled and held his shoulders and his hands rested on your thighs. "So angel, what do you want to make?" You scrunched your face as you began thinking, your husband laughing and kissing your cheek. 

"I think you should just surprise me really, pretty boy." You left a kiss on his forehead, running your hands over his shoulders and down his chest. "I'm going to take a nice, long bath while you make us something nice." He pouted, resting his forehead on yours. 

"I thought we were going to do this together... I don't want you to go." You giggled and pecked his lips, cupping his cheeks. 

"Fineeeee... you big baby. I'll stay, just for you." Kylo smiled and kissed you, his arms snaking around your waist as you pulled his body against yours. You broke the kiss, smiling and hopping off the counter. "Let's go lover boy, I'm hungry." As you walked away, Kylo smacked your arse causing you to jump and spin around. He smirked and stuck his tongue out at you, walking over to the cupboards and removing ingredients. As he began preparing the food, you stood behind him. Your hands snaked around his waist, resting on his stomach as your head lay against his back. You sighed and rubbed circles on his skin as he began cooking, your body following his as he moved and stretched. 

"I thought you'd be helping more pet." Kylo laughed and looked over his shoulder at you. 

"It's my birthday, I don't have to help. I just want to cuddle." His hand rested on top of yours, pulling you in front of him and trapping you between his body and the counter. 

"All you do is cuddle, cheeky little girl. Come on, let me guide you." You turned in his arms, Kylo's hands covering yours as he controlled your movements. His head came down and rested on your shoulder, leaving kisses on your cheek as he helped you finish preparing the food. Once it was ready to cook, Kylo released you and placed the pot in the oven. As he did, you walked over and laid on the sofa. 

"All this cooking has made me so tired." You stretched your arms up in an exaggerated yawn, smiling as Kylo walked over.

"You know what, so am I..." before you could speak, Kylo fell on top of you. His large frame crushing yours as he pretended to fall asleep on top of you. You screamed as his chest covered your face, giggling but desperately trying to move him from you. 

"Kylo! I can't breathe you big beast!" your hands tried pulling his shoulder up but he was too strong; body like a statue on top of your tiny frame. Giving in, your arms dropped to your sides, too tired to try and move him. As they did, Kylo's head popped up, looking down at you and laughing. His hands snaked up your sides, body rising to kneel over you as his fingers tickled your stomach. Giggling, you began to kick as the assault on your sides became more pressured; the feeling causing tears to form in your eyes as your laughter began to grow. 

"Look who's not tired anymore, hm?" Kylo smirked and carried on, pinning your hips to the sofa with his own body weight. "You can't escape me little one, you know that," Kylo bent down to catch your lips with his, hands stopping their movements and gripping your sides as your lips began moving together. Your hands cupped his cheeks as you smiled, kissing him back as you relaxed back into the sofa. His lips backed away from yours as Kylo sat back up. "I never knew you were so ticklish," he smirked and stood up, "good to know." You stuck your tongue out at him as you sat up.

Kylo walked back over to the kitchen, removing the food from the cooker and placing it on the table. "You joining me my love?" Candles lit, Kylo dimmed the lights in the room and held his hand out for you as you walked over. Taking his hand, you smiled as he led you over to the table. 

"I really can't believe you did all this." He kissed your forehead and pulled out your chair, letting you sit and tucking the chair back in. The meal passed by with gentle conversation, looking back on the day and enjoying each other's company.

Once everything had been finished, you both resumed your place on the sofa by the fire. As you lay against your husband's chest, his arms wrapping around you and playing with your small hands, you let out a sigh. "Tell me about your family." Kylo's body noticeably stiffened at your question, hands freezing as he considered what you said. "You know about mine, about what happened. I don't know anything about where you come from." His arms tensed, stare becoming cold as his gaze locked onto something in the distance. You sat up and turned to face him, hand stroking up and down his chest. 

"I am an orphan, just as you are..." you placed a kiss to his forehead, trying to make him relax as you felt tension growing. "My parents, they... they did not share the same vision. They were weak and chose to stand against me." You bit your lip, feeling an overwhelming sense on unrest as he continued speaking. "My father especially. So weak... he wanted me to be so different than what I knew I was meant to be." Kylo finally looked at you, hand cupping your cheek and bringing you in for a kiss. It was short, but you felt the need in his touch as he pulled away. He looked down briefly, before meeting your eyes once again. "Little one, sometimes you have to let the past die. Kill it if you have to..." you bit your lip, a sense of fear creeping up your spine as the look in his eyes changed. "That's the only way to become what you are meant to be." His hand on your cheek kept you facing him, unable to look away from the burning within his eyes. Your hands lay on his shoulders, rubbing slow circles as you stared into the void of his soul. 

"I will not let you make the same mistakes they did. I will not make the mistakes they did. Together, we will become everything we are meant to be and more. Understand?" You nodded; mind too busy considering everything he had just said. 

There was something he wasn't saying, and by the look in his eye you knew asking would only bring out a side in him you didn't want to see. Lips connecting to yours, Kylo's thumb stroked over your cheek soothing you as he felt the emotions run within you. Your hands held onto either side of his neck, bringing him closer to you as you tried to kiss away the pain you saw in his eyes. His body relaxed under you touch; the feeling of your hands on him calmed any storm that could brew inside. 

You sighed as his hands ran around your sides and under your bottom, pulling you flush against him as he bit your lip. Kylo smiled and pulled back, your lip still caught in his teeth. Hands sneaking up his neck, you tugged his hair and smirked as he released your lip and groaned. "Thank you for my special birthday pretty boy." You kissed his forehead, wrapping your arms around his neck and grinning down at him. 

"I think we should head upstairs baby. Time for bed so we can enjoy our time together tomorrow. Our last day needs to be special and it can't be if my pretty girl is tired." You nodded, yawning as if one que. It astounded you how well he knew you; how he could pick up on the smallest changes in the way you acted and know what you needed. 

Scooping you up, Kylo stood and held you against his body, carrying you up to your bed. His eyes still held a glimmer of pain, as if your previous conversation was still festering in his mind. Life before you wasn't something he cared to talk about much, but you couldn't help wanting to know more.


	27. Chapter 27

Sunlight seeped in through the window, catching your eyes and causing you to wake up. The bed beside you was empty, cold sheets all you had to hold. Sitting up, you rubbed your eyes and looked around but there was no sign of your husband. You sighed, climbing out of bed and walking into the bathroom to get ready for the day. 

Once you had washed and dressed, you made your way downstairs in hopes you’d find Kylo but were met with even more silence. Biting your lip, you walked around looking for any sign but were met by nothing. You stood by the window, looking out and seeing your husband stood in the field. Tilting your head, you watched as he trained; saber lit and spinning around his body as he practised amongst the flowers. Walking out the front door, you stood leaning against the wall watching as he swung the weapon effortlessly. 

Stopping as he sensed your presence Kylo turned to you and smiled, beckoning you over with one finger. Walking over, you greeted him with a kiss as his arm snaked around your waist. Moving your lips away, you looked up at your husband and wiped the sweat dripping down his forehead. “Morning my love, I needed to get some anger out of my system… didn’t want to wake you so thought I’d take the time to train.” You kissed him once more, cupping his cheek and pulling him close to you. 

“What’s got you angry my darling? We’re out here together, nothing should be bothering you… is it me?” Kylo quickly shook his head, turning off his saber and clipping it to his waist so he could hold you in his arms. 

“Princess no, of course not. Never,” he kissed your forehead, “I just let my mind wander too much last night. Things I try to ignore… they got the best of me. But now you’re here with me, all of that just disappears.” His hands rubbed soothing circles into your hips, holding you close as his lips attached to yours again. Your hands tangled in his hair, bringing him as close as possible while your lips glided in unison. A soft moan left you once Kylo’s tongue ran over your bottom lip, asking for permission which you mouth readily gave. Before you lost yourself in the embrace, you pulled back and smiled as your husband groaned. “Pet, come back here. I’m not done with you yet.” His lips crashed back down onto yours, hands moving up to tangle in your hair as yours fell to sit on his belt. His hands kept you in place, lips assaulting yours with passion and need. Hands dipping into the pockets of his trousers, you pulled his body against yours and moaned as Kylo tugged at your hair. Lips finally parting once more, you panted as breath returned to your lungs, eyes flickering up to meet the dark orbs looking down at you. “What does my girl want to do today then? Because, if I get to keep you here like this any longer…” his eyes roamed your body, hands still tight in your hair, “I won’t be able to control myself and we’ll end up just fucking in this field…” he smirked and began to kiss your neck, hands in your hair guiding your face to point to the sky. You bit your lip, revelling in the feeling of his lips against the sensitive skin on your neck. “Doesn’t sound like my girl is protesting that idea…” you felt him smirk against your neck, biting down gently and bucking his hips against yours. Not letting him get his way, your hands pressed against his chest creating a small distance between your two bodies.

“Not so fast big boy. You don’t get to have your way all the time.” He laughed and pouted, his hands dropping to lay on your waist. You giggled, leaving a gentle peck on his bottom lip and walking back towards the compound. “Come on, we need to get ready.” Kylo’s head tilted as he began to follow you inside, curious as to what you had planned.

Relaxation; that’s all you wanted from your last day away. You had convinced Kylo to go on a picnic into the woods, taking a basket and a blanket with you. You had snuck a small music player into the basket whilst Kylo was getting ready. 

As you both walked into the wilderness, you smiled and took in your surroundings; your husband watching your joyful expression and forgetting any worries he had felt earlier that day. Settling on a quiet clearing within the forest, Kylo laid out the blanket for you both to rest on. The forest was so beautiful and peaceful; it was perfect for spending the day with the one you love. 

Laying on the blanket, you opened your arms and beckoned Kylo over to you. He smiled and took your hand, joining you on the floor as you looked up through the leaves above you. “This is my happy place…” you sighed, holding his hand as you looked up to the sky. He turned to look at you, admiring the relaxed look on your face. 

“You always look so happy in nature; I’m not surprised this is where you are most happy.” Turning to meet his gaze, you giggled and moved closer to him, 

“I meant here with you, silly. It doesn’t matter where we are… you are my happy place.” His lips attached to yours, free hand cupping your face as you rolled over to rest on top of him. Your hands still linked, kiss tender and loving as your free hand rested on the ground beside his head. Sitting up, you brushed your hair out of your face and smiled down at the man underneath you. 

“You’re my best view. Not just my happy place, but my entire happiness darling.” Blushing, you bit you lip and stood, smiling as you saw Kylo sit up to watch you. Bending down you took the music player out of the basket and turned it on, turning and calling your husband over to join you. “Look who’s full of surprises,” he smiled and flicked his wrist, bringing you flying over to him as his hands caught you, “you do love to dance, don’t you baby?” you nodded and giggled, taking his hands as he began to spin you in time with the music. 

“Only when it’s with you, my husband. This just feels like the perfect time, and you know you enjoy it just as much as I do.” Kylo kissed your cheek and nodded, swaying with you as the sunlight shone down through the leaves. 

“You know me so well my beautiful wife. I can’t deny that having you in my arms like this is one of the best feelings I know. No one has ever managed to make me dance before you came along.” Kylo dipped you, your head dropping back as you swung with the melody. Dancing in the broken sunlight was just like something out of a fairy tale, like the ones your mother used to read to you. The forest made you feel close to her; you saw images of her reading to you under the same trees. Kylo noticed your shift in emotion, looking into your mind and watching the memories come flooding back. He brought you close to his chest, arms instinctively wrapping around you and holding you tightly. “Little one. Don’t be sad. She’s still with you. I know it.” 

You smiled and looked up at him, kissing him softly. He rested his forehead on yours as your lips left him, guiding you to sit down again as he held you to his chest.

“You know, I don’t actually know what happened to your parents. I feel like it’s something you want to talk about, but haven’t. Whenever I’ve looked inside that mind of yours, it’s always been hidden.” It was true, you’ve never really spoken about your parents passing with anyone, even Kylo. 

The memories had always been too painful to revisit, but having him by your side made you feel strong enough. Sighing, you leant against his strong frame. “It’s hard for me to talk about, but… maybe I need to. Maybe that will help me move on.” His hands rubbed up and down your side, soothing you and helping you open up. “I was 14 when my father signed up to be a solider for the First Order. He had always supported the movement, but didn’t want to enlist until he felt I was old enough to be without him for long periods of time. They both used to leave for a few days at a time to go to rallies or conferences, but it was never more than that and I always had people close by looking out for me. Well, until my closest friend moved away. His family hated what the world was becoming it seemed. I don't know, I never got the chance to ask before they vanished one day without a goodbye. That's when I did feel alone when they left, all alone. The Order had only recently posted soldiers on our planet, so it wasn’t as if there was a crazy amount of fighting. My mother was so proud of him, we both were. She herself was a TIE technician, they both worked so hard for what they believed was right.” 

Kylo’s hands intertwined with yours, finger running over your wedding rings as he listened to every word you said. “It was about two years after he first joined that the Resistance grew on our planet. Because of where we are, this was the perfect planet for them to win from the Order to gain an advantage and an easy point of call on the way to the capital. Fighting began to consume everything. It was so dark…” a tear fell down your cheek; flashbacks of the smoke and the sounds of gunfire echoing in your mind. Kylo’s lips rested on your temple, leaving soft kisses on your skin. “Two days after my 18th birthday, that’s when… they were both posted in the main vehicle bay. Mum was fixing ships that came in from battle, while dad was scheduled to fly out in the next wave. I was told they were together when it happened, my mother had a break and decided to visit dad before he flew out.” You smiled, wiping your cheek and looking up at your husband. He smiled and nodded, resting his hand on your cheek. “It was quick; no one saw it coming. The explosions were so loud, I remember hearing them from the house. Flash so bright, you could see it for miles. No one knew how they managed to get in and lay the explosives, but… there were no survivors. Everyone, every ship, worker, weapon… vaporised.” Kylo looked down, hand on your cheek moving to hold your hand again.

“I’ve heard stories of that day, pet. It was around the time I began training under the Supreme Leader. No one could believe what happened.” Your head lay against his shoulder, a long sigh falling from your lips. 

“I ran as fast as I could towards the bay. It was like I knew what had happened, knew what was waiting for me… but I had to know for sure. I had to see it, but when I did…” Kylo cooed in your ear, shhing you gently as tears began rolling down your face. He held you tightly, kissing your temple and rubbing your arm. 

“That’s its baby, that’s it… let go baby it’s alright.” Your body relaxed, the feeling of pain lifting from your shoulders as you finally let the feelings of loss settle. 

“It took about 3 weeks before they cleared the bay and identified the bodies… I already knew, it was simply formalities at this point. After the funeral, I immediately went to the command centre in town and signed up myself. If they couldn’t fight anymore… I would. I was prepared to help finish what they started.” Kylo smiled and shook his head, chin resting on your shoulder.

“I know how that feels… gods you really are just like me.” Your head turned to face him, lips brushing against his cheek as he leant into your touch. “My grandfather was my biggest inspiration, the reason I am who I am today. I vowed to finish what he started so long ago. And, I am… I have. You help me build the world he wanted to create.” You smiled, kissing his cheek gently and playing with his hair. 

“He must have been a great man, to inspire such greatness in you.” Kylo sat up and looked at you, thinking for a moment before uttering the next sentence. 

“Darth Vader was my grandfather…” your jaw dropped. Brain not being able comprehend, you sat up and wiped your cheeks of tears. Looking at him, your mind raced as you considered what he said. Kylo looked into your eyes, trying to figure out what you were feeling as you remained silent. “When you asked me about my mask, I wanted to tell you… I just wasn’t ready. But hearing you confide in me, hearing how you feel the same things I feel when I think about him, it made me realise I could trust you with everything.” You smiled lightly, placing a kiss on his cheek and relaxing again. 

“Thank you, for trusting me so much. He would be proud to see what you have done Kylo. I am so proud to see what you have done.” Your lips connected once again, hands reaching up to cup his face as he brought you onto his lap. He sighed against your lips, smiling up at you as you pulled away. “I’ve always thought you reminded me of him… I thought it was just the mask” you giggled and kissed his forehead, seeing him smile back at you made your heart flutter. You spent the next few minutes losing all sense of reality as you looked into each other’s eyes. Each second you slipped deeper into his soul, feeling his heart beat under your hand that rested on his chest.

Finally coming back to reality, you shook yourself out of the trance and stood up, grabbing a drink from the basket and leaning against a tree. Kylo sat watching you, taking in every inch of your body as you smiled at him from where you stood. “So now, you know everything about me my husband… do I know everything about you?” he stood and walked over to you, capturing your hands in his own. 

“There’s too much to me to know it all in one sitting… maybe one day you’ll know me in my entirety. But for now, you know everything you need to.” He kissed your hand, placing it over his shoulder as he took your hips in his grip. Looking into his eyes, you saw everything you could ever want; the setting sun making them glow an intense hazel shade. He looked happy, relaxed; that’s all you could ever hope to give him. “It’s time to head back pet, we need to be up early tomorrow alright?” You nodded, packing up the blanket and picnic gear making sure not to leave anything behind. 

Kylo took the basket, putting his arm out for you to take as he guided you back through the forest. The walk back was calm and quiet, your arms gripping his large one as he led the way. Your mind was racing with everything that had happened in the past hour, everything you both had shared kept replaying as your heart filled with love and admiration for the man you were holding onto. 

The fact he trusted you so much, that he wanted to share his secrets with you showed you how much he loved you. Once back, you both made your way upstairs to pack and prepare for returning home tomorrow. Before long, you found yourself in bed wrapped in your husband’s loving embrace. The warmth of his body against yours helped you ease into a deep and peaceful slumber.

The journey back was easy, the feeling of being home again both joyous and disappointing. You loved what you did, you loved your people; but the time you spent with Kylo at the retreat was always so different, so special. You always felt low for a few days after returning, but it soon passed once you got back into your duties. Spending time with the children always made you feel better, and Kylo loved visiting and helping out when he could. There was a lot of work and sometimes it all got too much for you. One evening, you mentioned that you were struggling with managing everything alone, so Kylo offered to find someone to help you. It meant a lot to you; finally having someone to deal with trivial matters while you focussed on important tasks made you even more excited to go back to work.


	28. Chapter 28

About a week after your return, Kylo appointed you a class aid to help distribute the burdens of running the facility. You weren’t a part of the selection process, but trusted your husband’s judgement and knew he would find someone suitable for the position. The day your aid arrived was like a breath of fresh air. 

His name was Jafan and you quickly established a great working relationship. He was slightly older, tall and tanned, with thick blonde hair. Shining blue eyes that always looked so happy. Any woman would easily consider him very attractive. Jafan was very much like you; he wanted to help the next generation grow as strong as they can be which meant he was just as passionate about your work. Having someone around to help allowed you to focus more on the children and their education instead of worrying with administrative nonsense.

Kylo had yet to visit the class since your aid had arrived; he had become extremely busy training soldiers for new ranks within the army and couldn’t spare the time during the day. You wanted them to meet, wanting Kylo to appreciate and respect the person who had been helping you so much over the past weeks. Jafan had really facilitated your success in the new position and you thought he deserved recognition for his work.

It was just a normal day in the classroom. Basic weapons training had finished and the younglings wanted to hear a story before they returned home to their families. Reading to them was your favourite part of the job, and so you were more than happy to oblige. 

You walked over to the bookshelf, eyes scanning the vast array of stories on offer. Settling on the one on wanted, your small frame began to stretch up in an attempt to grab the book from its high perch. After visibly struggling for a moment, you felt a gentle arm wrap around your waist as Jafan came to stand beside you. His free hand reaching effortlessly above you to retrieve the book you couldn't get to. You smiled and blushed, eyes looking down at the floor before looking back up at the man in front of you. “Struggling there, madam?” He smiled and handed you the book, arm on your waist not moving. Before you could speak, a loud knock at the door made you jump and spin towards to entrance. Your husband stood in the doorway; arms crossed over his chest with a cold expression on his face. His brow raised slightly as Jafan moved backwards from you, bowing as Kylo walked over.

“My love I didn't know you were coming today, I'm so glad you're here.” You smiled and wrapped your arms around his neck, his instinctively crossing behind your hips. His eyes didn't leave the man stood behind you, even when you placed a soft peck on his lips. “You can finally meet Jafan, the class aid I've told you so much about.” Hold on you falling, Kylo walked over to the man and once again crossed his arms over his chest. No matter how tall Jafan was, his frame looked tiny compared to your husband. 

“So... you're the one who spends all day with my wife? Seems you feel awfully comfortable with your hands on her.” 

Eyes darting towards the children and then back to the exchange, you quickly intervened. Standing by Kylo's side with a hand sliding across his back, you rubbed soft circles trying to calm him down. “Darling play nice. Jafan was simply helping me reach something from these ridiculously high shelves. The children wanted to hear a story and you know how much I love to read to them.” Kylo looked down at you by his side, seeing the warm smile on your face made him relax slightly. He looked around to the children gathered on the floor, eagerly waiting for a story to be read. 

A smile grew on his face as he looked down at them. “Ok pet, you go read to them. I'll wait for you to finish and then we can head home.” He kissed your cheek and took a seat to the side of the room, watching as you sat at the front of the class and began reading. Jafan remained stood by the bookshelf, watching as you began the story. The feeling of both men staring at you made your focus break for a moment, a nervous energy rising in your stomach as you tried to concentrate on the children and the story.

Once the book had finished, the children gathered their belongings and made their way to the exit. Many of them running over to Kylo, desperate to talk to him and show him what they could do. You stood and watched, smile growing as he began to interact with them, Jafan came over to stand by your side. “I must say, I didn’t expect him to be so good with the kids.” You looked up at the man stood beside you and raised your brow. “I mean, it’s Kylo Ren. The scariest man in the galaxy, but he’s so gentle with them. And with you it seems.” You bit your lip, looking back over to your husband who laughed as the children around him tried showing him the moves you had taught them earlier that day. Your heart filled with pride as you saw how calm and gentle he was with them, smiling as he encouraged the young ones to show him their moves. 

“There’s so much more to him than people realise,” you smiled, “he really is an incredible person.” Jafan chuckled as one of the children span too fast and fell, shaking his head and looking back down to you.

“I’d hate to think of someone as kind and loving as you with anyone who didn’t show you the proper love you deserved. You don’t deserve coldness and anger.” Before you could respond, Kylo stood from his position with the children and walked over. 

“What do you mean by that, aid?” You felt the anger building as Kylo took the comment personally, his fist clenching as you gripped one of his hands. “Something you want to say to me? Dare to comment on the way I conduct myself around my wife?” you tried to interject, hand resting on his chest as you looked up at him. 

“Don’t do this love, you know that isn’t what he meant. Even if it is, you know it’s not true so please just relax for me.” He didn’t even look down at you, eyes trained on the man in front of him. Jafan bowed and stepped back, creating a distance between himself and your husband. 

“My apologies, I never would have intended to cause offence Emperor Ren. It was more a comment on the character of your wife than you. All I meant was that she is a token to you and any man would be lucky to have someone like her by their side. I can’t deny knowing of the fragmented past between you two, but that isn’t my business and I wouldn’t wish to bring that up.” Kylo’s brow raised, arm leaving your hand and wrapping tightly around your waist, pulling you flush against his side. 

“You’re right, she is by my side. You better remember that or you’ll find yourself out of your position and in serious danger. You’re lucky she means so much to me. Lucky she’s here, because if she wasn’t, you’d see just how scary and cold I can be.” Jafan nodded quickly, bowing once more and taking the que for him to leave. Kylo’s eyes burned into him as he left the room before finally looking down at you. “Home. Now.”

“You really do enjoy being in the arms of little blonde peasant boys don't you pet? You like to spend time with fools who think they have a right to challenge me.” Kylo slammed the door to your chambers as you stood by the window, eyes burning into him as he approached you. The walk home had been quiet, Kylo’s grip on your arm tight as he marched you through the tower to your room. His eyes cold as they stared down at you, chests touching as yours rose and feel with each frustrated breath you took. 

“How can you be mad at me Kylo? You're the one who appointed him! I had no say in who was sent to help me, that was all on you. I would’ve accepted help from anyone you wanted but you picked him for whatever reason. I bet you didn’t even look into who you chose. You couldn’t be bothered to really consider who you left me with. He was just complimenting me for fuck sake. You make it sound like I was the one that went out and chose to have an attractive aid just to spite y-“ You were silenced when his hand gripped your jaw, face being pointed upward to stare deep into his eyes. 

“What was that love... you find him attractive?” You growled and tried to pull away but his grip on your face tightened. “Little slut spends her days staring at the help instead of focussing on her duties. Is that why you won't give me a child, pet, too busy keeping your options open? Can't give me what I want because she's too busy lusting over servants.” His words hurt you; they made you furious. Your hands collided harshly with his chest, freeing yourself from his grasp and stumbling backwards. 

“Don't you dare even say that, you prick. You know that's not true, so don't you fucking dare! When I have a child is my choice, my business. We already spoke about this and you told me you were happy to wait. Now you want to act like I’m not giving you a child because I want to hurt you. How dare you speak like you have some kind of right over my body.” You sighed, arms crossing as you looked down at the floor. “Why do you always do this? We have such a good time when we go away, you really open up to me… and as soon as we get back you become this. Maybe if my husband wasn't such a psychotic villain with violent mood swings, I wouldn't have so many doubts about bringing life into the world with him!” 

The back of his hand quickly came into contact with your face, harsh slap causing your body to spin and fall to the ground. Your hand quickly resting on the burning mark he had left, thumb wiping a drip of blood from your now broken lip. Kylo looked down at you, panting as his tense frame softened. Anger in his eyes disappearing as he realised what he had done. You looked up at him, your own eyes teary and cheek stained red from the impact. 

He stepped back, almost scared of what he saw in front of him. Before he had the chance to speak, you rose from the floor and marched towards the door. Kylo called your name, running after you and grabbing your hand. “My love please, wait... don't go. I didn't mean it I promise. Baby don’t leave let’s just talk.” You yanked your hand away from his touch, looking into his eyes one last time. Anger becoming too much, you spat at him; drips of blood and saliva connecting with his cheek as you walked out the door. Making your way down the hallway, you could hear his screams of anger; the familiar noise of the saber colliding with the wall echoed as you distanced yourself from the room as quickly as possible.

Making your way to the vehicle holding bay, you requested a small personal vessel be prepared for you immediately. The officers were hesitant at first, not wanting to act in fear of angering the emperor, but when they took in your bruised appearance they agreed and readied a ship for you. With very little piloting experience, you were nervous about taking a vehicle yourself but your broken heart and need to leave outweighed your fear. The officers had locked in the co-ordinates at your request so there was very little you actually had to do in order to reach your destination; simply make sure all systems were operational for the duration of the flight. Before entering the ship, you requested your location be kept anonymous, but the officers could not promise this from fear for their lives if the emperor were to discover they'd helped you and concealed where you were going. You sighed, but nodded as you turned to walk up the ramp and into the ship.

Touching down, a small handful of staff greeted you; your arrival was unexpected and so they hadn't prepared a typical welcome. This didn't concern you, assuring them it was no issue and asking they simply escort you to the fort. You knew he'd work out where you were quickly, knew he'd see the red fields in your thoughts and come to find you, but you needed to go home. You wanted to get away from him for as long as possible, and the fields always soothed your soul when it felt broken. Entering the building on your own for the first time hurt; you had only ever visited with Kylo. The idea of having the big house all to yourself was scary, but you couldn't be near him after what he said and did.

You walked into the bathroom, clothes dropping to the floor as you drew yourself a warm bath. While you waited for the tub to fill, you took in your appearance in the mirror. Dried blood cracking on your lip, cheek swollen and red. You'd left battlefields looking less beaten than this, enemies not damaging you as much as one swipe from your husband. Tears began rolling down your cheeks; you looked away as the view became too much to bear and stepped into the now full bath tub. Warm water covering your aching body, you settled against the edge of the basin and allowed yourself to gently float.

The moment kept replaying in your mind, sound of the impact still ringing in your ears. Each time you saw the hand come down, you flinched and began to cry even harder. You couldn't believe he'd struck you in such a way, with so much force. The look of pain in his own eyes made your heart break even more, tears running down your cheek and cooling the hot flesh of the bruise forming as you saw his fearful expression before you closed the door. He had looked even more scared than you; even more pained by what he had done.

The warm water of the bath helped you calm down, cries stifling as you began to relax. You didn't want to go back, didn't want to face your husband in fear of what he would do. 

Finally climbing out of the bath, you wrapped a towel loosely around your body and stepped into the bedroom. The silence of the empty house left you uneasy; no servants or help posted because of your unannounced arrival. You truly were all alone with your thoughts, a dangerous place to be.

The night had been hard; you could barely sleep, the feeling of being all alone in such a big bed made your anxiety spike. It had been so long since you'd been alone like this, your body not reacting well to the unfamiliar coldness of the sheets. 

Getting up, you grabbed some clothes that you had left here on previous trips and slowly dressed. One quick glance in the mirror made you see that your cheek had now turned a harsh purple colour where Kylo's hand had caught the skin. The pain dull but noticeable, lip slightly swollen and scabbed over. Seeing yourself in such a way made you scared, made you nervous. Wanting to distract yourself, you quickly left the bedroom and walked downstairs. You jumped slightly when you were met with two servants preparing food for you in the kitchen, both sending you an empathetic smile as they took in your injuries. It didn't take a genius to work out what had happened, but no one brought direct attention to it. Nodding to each of them, you smiled lightly and made your way out of the front door.


End file.
